TITLE:      K IS FOR KISMET
AUTHOR:     DONNILEE@SNET.NET
RATING:     NC-17 (Of course, what else do I write?)
WARNING:    Descriptive sex. Smut warning.
CATEGORY:   MSR
SUMMARY:    Scully can't ignore this "thing" between them 
anymore and decides to make Mulder fess up about his 
feelings for her.
SPOILERS:   Little ones for previous episodes here and 
there, nothing specific.
DISCLAIMER: Nope. Not mine. Used shamelessly and without 
remorse. They belong to Chris Carter, 1013 and Fox, and god knows 
who else, but not me. 
AUTHOR'S NOTE:  This is more "fluff" than I usually do.  
There is not X-File in this one and not really much of a 
plot.  It is a consummate the relationship story, straight 
up, no frills!  

WEBSTER'S NEW NINTH COLLEGIATE DICTIONARY

Kis-met (kizmit, kismit) n. fate as a predetermining power 
|| one's fate [Turk. Fr. Arab.]

PART 1 ( R )

GEORGETOWN 
FRIDAY EVENING 
9:30 PM 

The case was finally over.  We'd have a weekend off for a 
change.  Another one solved.  It was an X-File in the fact 
that it was weird and the D.C.P.D. couldn't figure it out.  
But it turns out that it wasn't paranormal or unexplained.  
The culprit was a delusional weirdo who thought that by 
drinking the blood of his victims, he could imbue himself 
with their qualities and the strength of their spirit.  He 
drained his victims of blood into containers through a 
sterile pharyngeal tube for later feasting.

I watched my partner driving from my dark corner of the 
passenger seat. The green light from the dashboard cast a 
subtle glow over his features, his high cheekbones in 
shadow. He had thrown his trench coat and suit jacket in 
the back of the car when we got in and rolled up his shirt 
sleeves to be comfortable for the drive. He didn't like 
driving in a jacket. A little quirk of his that I'd come to 
know over the years. 

This case had shown all the earmarks of an X-File. The 
absence of blood was strange, but we'd seen things like 
that before. The ensanguined cows were a case I'd rather 
forget. Mulder had told me briefly of his encounter with 
vampires while I missing. I had no idea how much to 
believe. I'd read the case file. So what now? Well, a good 
night's sleep wouldn't be a bad thing. I was tired. My feet 
hurt from walking in heels all day. 

I really had to get over this being short thing and just 
start wearing lower heels. They were no good for my back 
and I couldn't take it on long days like this. I was short 
enough as it was and felt like a midget next to Mulder with 
no heels, but the more I thought about it, the sillier it 
seemed. I had a lot better things to be hung up about.

Like my unrelenting attraction to my partner. He glanced 
over at me and caught my examining him. He was relaxed, one 
hand on the wheel, the other on his thigh, lightly tapping 
his fingers to the jazz tune playing on the radio quietly. 
He smiled that slow, lazy smile he has and I felt a flush 
of heat rake over my face and turned away. There was 
something about that smile that unnerved me. It was almost 
as if he was saying out loud, 'I know you're checking me 
out and I love it.'

I stared out the window, hiding my blush from his gaze. He 
pulled up to the curb at the front of my building. I let 
out a huge sigh and reached for the door handle. His hand 
came down on my left one that was bracing on the seat to 
push me up and out of the door. I froze as the warmth of 
his hand permeated my skin and sent a shiver up my arm and 
made me lower my ear to my shoulder involuntarily. 

"Mulder?"

Do you want to go out for breakfast tomorrow?" 

I turned to look at him. We only did breakfast together 
when we were out of town and then usually it was bagels and 
cream cheese or something else portable. "We don't need to, 
we're home for once."

"I didn't ask you if we needed to. I asked you if you 
wanted to." He looked at me calmly, still not releasing my 
hand.

"I ... guess so. Where do you want to go?" 

"There a nice little diner in D.C. I've been wanting to 
take you there, but we never seem to be out that way. 

He'd been wanting to take me there? "Uh, O.K., then pick me 
up at 8:00. If we are going to go out to eat, I don't want 
to feel rushed."

He smiled again. "Good, 8:00 AM it is." He released my hand 
and I pushed out of the car quickly. 

I said a quick, "Good night!" over my shoulder as I walked 
briskly into my building. What was going on here? It was 
just breakfast for Christ's sake. We'd eaten together a 
million times before. It was an opportunity to dine out 
because we wanted to, not because we had to. That's all it 
was. 'I've been wanting to take you there.' Shit. I gave 
myself the stern reprimand, 'Go to bed Dana and stop 
reading into it.'

WASHINGTON D.C. 
OUTSKIRTS-CAROL'S DINER
8:30 AM 

This was definitely a cut above your average diner. I'd 
only been in here once before, and then I'd been alone. The 
booths were tiny and private, having three walls 
surrounding a small table with a bench seat. I slid in next 
to her after she had sat down. We ordered and I went to the 
bathroom. When I returned I casually slid into the booth 
but slid closer to her than before. As close as I dared 
without arousing suspicion.

We discussed the case a little bit and what we would put in 
our report to Skinner.  He would be glad another one was 
solved. That conversation over, we sat in silence and ate 
slowly, enjoying our breakfast.  Spending time with her 
outside of work was playing with fire.  I was more likely 
to give my feelings away when I wasn't distracted by work 
but I couldn't seem to stop myself from asking her to be 
with me.  I couldn't stand to be away.

I'd had the hots for my partner for a long time.  I'd been 
attracted to her physically almost since the beginning.  
I'd been in love with her for a shorter time, but even that 
seemed like forever.  I'd pretty much given up hope of ever 
having more than friendship with her.  But then, in the 
last couple of months, I'd caught her looking at me ... 
differently.

Her face would be soft and relaxed with tenderness and a 
sort of admiration, whether for me or my body, I couldn't 
say.  When I'd catch her, she would blush.  That was the 
give away.  If she'd just been looking at me feeling 
fondness, there wouldn't be a blush.  I hadn't said 
anything to increase her embarrassment, yet.  But only a 
guilty conscious or embarrassment would cause her to blush 
when nothing had been said.  I wanted her so badly, but at 
the same time, I was frightened out of my wits.

Yesterday, I'd caught her twice.  Once when I was bending 
over Mason Blackwell, 
examining the puncture wound in his neck.  I was talking 
about how unusually large and round it was, definitely not 
a stab wound.  I sensed she wasn't paying attention when 
she didn't respond after I had asked her what she thought 
the weapon might be.  I turned and her eyes were fixed on 
my backside.  Not that I minded Scully checking out my ass, 
but it made me uncomfortable too, considering where we 
were.  I didn't need to get excited just then and that was 
exactly what her look was doing to me.  

I cleared my throat and she'd startled guiltily and looked 
at the victim with sudden over interest, rushing over and 
bending down, a blush creeping up her neck and spreading 
over her face as I watched.  I pretended not to notice and 
asked her if she was O.K., instead.  She blurted out her 
patented, 'I'm fine, Mulder,'  And then she mumbled some 
lame excuse about not sleeping well and zoning out.  

The second time had been in the car last night.  It had the 
same effect on me and I smiled just the same goofy way.

I found it hard to suppress the smile that wanted to grace 
my face when those 'moments' occurred.  Despite my best 
efforts not to get my hopes up, I found myself excited and 
hopeful.  I was paying careful attention to her wants and 
needs and emotional moods.  To many people, she might 
appear emotionless.  They called her the Ice Queen at work.  
But I knew better.  I could read her looks and usually tell 
what she was feeling.

Except when it came to me.  Real handy, huh?

It excited me to think Scully was attracted to me.  My 
feelings for her went way beyond the physical.  But that's 
where my feelings for her started.  My attraction caused me 
to pay attention to her.  And I fell in love with her mind, 
her dry humor, her tolerance for me, her compassion, and 
most of all, her willingness to stay by my side.

I watched her from under my lashes and became mesmerized by 
the sight of her full lips pursed around her fork as she 
slowly pulled it back and then began to chew her eggs 
slowly.  She seemed lost in her own thoughts.

I gave up trying to be discreet and just openly watched her 
chew, watching her neck muscles flex as she swallowed.  She 
sensed my scrutiny and became still.  She turned to face 
me.  I couldn't take my eyes off her lips.  A small flake 
of scrambled egg clung to the corner of her mouth.  I 
wanted to lick it off!

Instead, I lifted a finger to catch the crumb and tipped it 
into her lips.  Her lips opened slightly and caught the 
crumb with the tip of her tongue that darted out and 
quickly retreated.  But not before it swiped the end of my 
index finger.  A tingling jolt of electricity shot down my 
spine and pooled between my legs, causing my groin to stir.

I closed my eyes, biting back a moan.  I didn't dare move 
or I would give myself away.  She wasn't moving either.  I 
opened my eyes and her gaze immediately locked with mine.  
She was breathing shallowly.  It was unreal how I could be 
smacked with such a powerful wave of wanting her at the 
oddest moments.

Her expression turned from curiosity to surprise and it 
suddenly dawned on me that I wasn't hiding it.  I looked 
away and shut my eyes again, putting my blankest expression 
in place.  I glanced at her again but knew I'd been too 
late.  She'd seen it.  Oh God.  What now?

XXXXXXXXXX

My heart was in my throat.  I couldn't believe what I had 
just seen.  But I was sure of it.  He looked at me, his 
expression more unguarded than I'd ever seen it, except for 
when he was grieving for his mother.  And it was possibly 
the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.  His hazel eyes 
closed and when they reopened, they were dark green.  His 
pupils were huge and his eyes almost looked black.  I'd 
always wondered what this look would be like on his face.  
This was not his look of passionate obsession ... this was 
his look of desire ... for a woman ... me.

Desire.  Holy mother of God!  He did want me!  The force of 
that look slammed into me and I lost my breath.  I could 
still taste the salt of his finger on my tongue and I 
shivered under his look.  His eyes shuttered closed and he 
looked away from me.  I saw his jaw clench and his blank 
mask fall smoothly into place over his face.

Why did his efforts to hide it make me sad?  Oh, Mulder, 
Jesus.  What could I say?  Anything?  His hands were 
gripping his knees and he took a deep breath, still staring 
at the other side of the booth.  He was pulling away from 
me.  I could feel it and suddenly, I couldn't stand it.  
This was what we always did when we ventured into the 
territory beyond friendship.  

We'd both glimpsed this desire in each other and not been 
sure if we really saw it.  This ping pong game of sneak a 
peak and then hide that we were playing was getting 
ridiculous.  We were both adults.  We should at least be 
able to talk about it.  This thing between us, whatever it 
was, had been growing stronger.  It was strong enough now 
that it simply couldn't be ignored any longer.  I didn't 
want to ignore it anymore.  This constantly pulling away 
from each other was going to drive a wedge in our 
friendship and our working relationship if we didn't work 
it out.

Softly, I said, "Mulder, look at me."  

He shook his head slightly and said, "No, not yet."

I sighed.  "Now.  Stop hiding from me!"

He licked his lips and blinked his eyes rapidly.  "Scully, 
we should be going."

Damn it!  He was going to make a run for it.  It was only 
9:30 and we had all day if we wanted it.  But I didn't 
really want to talk here anyway.

"Can I drive?"

He smiled briefly and fished the keys out of his pocket.  
He was always amused by my desire to drive and since his 
crack about little feet reaching the pedals in Comity, he 
didn't feel he could object.  He stood up and yanked out of 
his wallet, dropping some cash on the table and carefully 
avoiding my gaze.

We walked in silence to the car.  Instead of heading toward 
my house, I drove to the park a few blocks away that I'd 
seen on the way in.  He said nothing but looked at me 
curiously.  I parked and hopped out.  He got out and 
followed me, no questions. It was cold out but we were both 
dressed for the weather in jeans, turtlenecks and long wool 
coats. I sat on a bench and patted the seat next to me.  
Seems we had some of our best talks on benches.  Maybe it 
would be the charm this time too.  He sat, elbows on his 
knees, peering out at the park.  It was deserted this time 
of morning.

"So, Mulder, what's going on in that handsome head of 
yours?"

He looked at me quickly and away again.  A flash of a smile 
came and went.  I'd never called him handsome before.

"Scully, why are we here?"

"Because we need to talk."

"Yeah, right, we need to talk, the masters of avoidance."  
His voice was dripping sarcasm.

"I want you to tell me what you're thinking about this 
thing between us."

"What thing?"

"Don't sing dumb with me!  Mulder, we've always been able 
to be honest with each other."

"Not about this."

"Why can't we be honest about this?"  I cursed how upset I 
sounded.

"This?"

"Stop it!  How we feel about each other."

He glanced at me again and shook his head slightly as if 
the idea amused him.  "Scully, I feel that we have a great 
partnership and a beautiful friendship.  The best I've ever 
had, in both arenas."

"That's what you feel about what we have now, I'm not 
talking about that and you know it.  I'm talking about what 
we WANT."

"What we have is so good, Scully."

"And?"

"And, so it's the most important thing in the world to me, 
NOT to screw that up.  I'm way past wanting you at my side, 
Scully.  I NEED you.  I don't ever want to risk doing 
something that might push you away.  It's too risky.  
There's too much at stake now."  His voice had lost its 
edge and he sounded reflective.

"But?"

"But ... that doesn't mean I don't feel things sometimes 
... all the time.  But I can keep it under control.  I 
don't have to ACT on those feelings."

"What do you feel?"

"Let's not go there right now, Scully."  He was agitated 
again.  He stood up and walked behind the bench, leaning 
against the backrest.  He was putting more distance between 
us.  I realized I was tired of that distance.  We could 
breech it when one of us were sick or injured.  Then, it 
was like all bets were off, and it was O.K., to cross that 
invisible line behind which we hid our emotions.  If I was 
sick, or he were hurt, it was suddenly O.K. to show how 
much we meant to each other.  

I stood up and walked behind the bench, facing him.  His 
hands gripped the top of the bench backrest beside him, his 
butt perched precariously.  I watched his knuckles turn 
white as they clenched and unclenched.  He was trying to 
strike a casual pose but the was wound tight as a spring.

I reached down and pulled his hands up and held them in 
mine.  He looked nervous as he stared at my hands, as my 
thumbs rubbed circles on the back of his.  "Stop pulling 
away from me, Mulder.   It's not what I want.  And if you 
mean what you say, ... it's going to drive a wedge between 
us and you say that's not what you want.  It hurts me when 
you pull away and hide from me like this.  It makes me feel 
like you don't trust me."

"You know I trust you."

"Not with everything."

"Yes I do."

"No, Mulder, you don't.  You trust me with work, you trust 
me with your friendship and some of your family secrets.  
But you don't trust me with what's in here."  I poked him 
with my index finger over his heart.

He swallowed noisily.  "I don't mean to hurt you, Scully.  
You have to know that.  I can't help it, guarding my 
emotions, trying not to feel too much.  I get scared..."

"Scared of what?"

He was silent a moment.  "Scared of what I feel ... and I 
want to protect you."

"Protect me?!  From what?!  Big, bad, Mulder?"

"From what I feel, Scully, because it could ruin 
everything.  You know me well enough to know that I don't 
do ANYTHING half way."

I shivered at the implication of that.  He was trying to 
say, without really saying it, that if we ever crossed that 
magic line, he would plunge in with both feet and there 
would be no reverse.  Maybe there wouldn't even be the 
possibility of slowing down.  

"If I don't know what you feel, then how I can tell you 
whether it's something I feel too."

He looked at my face then.  "I doubt it.  Be careful what 
you ask for, Scully.  Be VERY, VERY careful.  What we have 
now, it works.  It's awkward at moments, but it works.  If 
you want to know what's in here ... "  He pointed to his 
heart, "Be sure you're ready."

I held his gaze for a moment and nodded.  I understood.  
"Let me think about what I want to know.  This isn't really 
the place.  I'm getting cold."

"No, it's not."

"Can you promise me that we will talk about this later?"

"Yes.  If you want to, that is."

I nodded.  I stood there, reluctant to break the contact of 
holding his hand.  I suddenly had a huge case of 'I don't 
give a damn.'  I turned and stepped away from him.  And I 
didn't release his hand.  He pulled gently but I squeezed 
his hand tighter.  He looked at me, at my hand, at my face 
again.  I smiled gently and tugged again.  He stood up 
slowly and we began walking back to the car, not saying 
anything, but holding hands.  

I smiled inside.  I was unprepared for how that simple act 
of public display would effect me, even though there was no 
one to see it.  His hand was large and warm and almost 
completely engulfed mine.  It was such a 'couple' thing to 
do and I almost wished someone would see us.  Where did 
that come from?  God, I wanted him at the weirdest times.

I knew we were attracted to each other.  But was he 
attracted to me simply because I was the female that was 
with him the most?  The one that was in his face nearly 
every day of the week.  I was 'available'.  Big difference 
between that and being in love.  He'd said it once but he'd 
been drugged up at the time and I didn't dare take him 
seriously.  I could kick myself now.

We reached the car and stopped.  We both turned tentatively 
to look at each other.  He smiled slowly.  "Who's driving?"

"I am."

"You've always been in the driver's seat, Scully."  I 
tilted my head to indicate that I wasn't sure what he was 
saying.  "You still are."

Bing!  The light bulb just went off.  He was saying that I 
was in control of this relationship, this friendship, or 
this... this... whatever it was.  I was the one who would 
call the shots.  I would set the pace.  I would have to ask 
what I wanted to know and I would definitely have to be the 
one to make the first move if it came to that.  That gave 
me a little thrill. I smiled my understanding.  "Thanks."

"No thanks necessarily.  It's just the way it is."  I 
nodded again and let go of his hand.  He walked to the 
opposite side of the car and slid in.

XXXXXXXXXX

I couldn't get this whole incident out of my mind.  Neither 
of us had really admitted to anything, although for the 
first time we acknowledged this 'thing' between us.  That 
was a big step right there.  It wasn't like Scully to press 
me for what I was feeling.  We usually treated each other 
with a 'when you're ready, you'll tell me' attitude.  It 
was safer that way.  

That conversation on the bench, as banal as it sounded on 
the surface, was anything but.  That was definitely not 
safe territory.  Scully knew it.  It went against our 
unspoken agreement not to push each other emotionally.  It 
had always been that way.  We spilled when we were ready.  
She pushed it anyway.  What could that mean?

And she was right.  I wanted to trust her with my heart.  
But I honestly didn't know if I could.  It was too beat up 
in the past.  And she meant everything to me.  She could 
shatter it with one word, 'No.'  And that would change 
everything.  I was too much of a coward to risk what we 
had.  So, as much as I longed for her to feel the same way 
about me that I felt about her, I was unwilling to make 
that move.  Besides, she wasn't exactly the queen of 
sharing herself.

I knew I was asking a lot.  I had put the ball completely 
in her court.  But that's the way it had to be.  I knew 
that I needed her more than she needed me and that scared 
me too.  That was always a recipe for disaster in the past.  
I knew I was needy or had the potential to be.  And I 
didn't want to go into a relationship with Scully that way.  
I didn't want to put that burden on her.  In the past, I 
wouldn't have cared.  I didn't care whether meeting my 
needs was a burden to Phoebe or to Diana.  But I hadn't 
been in love with them.  I had thought I was.  But now I 
realized, I had been more in love with the idea of being in 
love.  They satisfied a need in me to feel loved for a 
while, but it was false.  As evidenced by the way both of 
those relationships ended badly.

We gave each other furtive glances throughout the ride back 
to her place.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder was quiet all the way home, sinking into his own 
thoughts.  What I wouldn't do to know what went on in that 
head of his!

I parked in front of my building.  "Want to come in for 
coffee?"

"Umm, Scully, maybe I should just go."

Oh, no mister, you're not running away that easily, I 
thought.  I looked at him.  "I want to spend more time with 
you."  

His head turned to me.  He looked frightened.  What the 
hell had I done to scare him?  Hold his hand?  "O.K., yeah, 
coffee would be good."

He followed me up and waited patiently while I opened the 
door and hung up our coats.  I went into the kitchen and 
started the coffee.  I spun around to head back out to the 
living room and ran smack into Mulder.  I hadn't even heard 
him follow me in.  "Oommpphh."  

I staggered from the impact and his arms wrapped neatly 
around my waist and steadied me.  The room was suddenly 
filled with tension.  I glanced up at him realizing my 
breasts were crushed to his chest.  There was that look 
gain.  How in the hell was a woman supposed to resist that 
look?  My voice came out husky as I said, "Uh, thanks.  I 
didn't hear you come up behind me."  

His arms began to loosen and he looked at the ground.  "No 
problem," he mumbled. I wrapped my arms around his waist 
and pulled him to me again.  He tried to swallow the little 
gasp that escaped him but I heard it.  His arms slid 
tentatively back around my shoulders and settled there, not 
holding me to him, just setting there.  "Scully?"

"Mmm, you are nice and warm.  It feels good to hug you like 
this."  I felt the deep breath he took.  He was obviously 
nervous.  I still wasn't sure why.  I was a little too, but 
not so nervous it was paralyzing me the way it seemed to be 
paralyzing him.  Maybe a little mundane talk.  "Uh, would 
you like anything to eat?  Cheese and crackers or 
something?"

"We just ate, Scully."

"Oh yeah.  Um, dumb question."

We both listened to the coffee pot grumble and avoided 
looking at each other.  I slowly stepped away from him and 
went to the cupboard and pulled out two mugs, appalled to 
find that my hands were shaking.  His voice sounded close 
behind my ear.  "Scully."

I startled and spun around, knocking one mug to the floor.  
It shattered and I jumped again, hopping out of the way of 
the flying ceramic.  "Damn it!" I shouted.

I went to walk past Mulder to get the dust pan and whisk 
broom when he stuck his arm out and stopped me.  "Look 
Scully, if me being here is making you so uptight, maybe I 
should just go.  Maybe we need some time to think about 
what we've said to each other."

"No!"  I was nearly shouting.  "Just let me clean this up."

"Scully, listen ..."

"No, Mulder!"  I looked him in the eye.  "I don't want you 
to leave.  So I'm a little nervous.  So what?  I want you 
to stay and talk to me."

"But ..."

"But nothing.  I was so happy when you asked me out for 
breakfast.  I just wanted to spend the day with you.  Is 
that too much to ask?"

His head tilted a little to the side and he looked at me, 
almost amused.  "You don't get enough of me during the 
week?"

"At work you're Mulder, my partner.  Today I want to spend 
time with Mulder, my friend."

He nodded slowly.  "O.K., I'll stay, but you need to relax.  
It bothers me to think that I am upsetting you."

"Deal."

Funny how we could say so little and mean so much.  I 
cleaned up the mug and grabbed another one.  By the time I 
pulled out the milk and sugar, the coffee was ready.  I 
poured us each a cup and we went to the living room and sat 
on the couch.  I reclined against the back of the sofa 
sipping my coffee.

"O.K., Scully, shoot.  What do you want to talk about?"

"You."

"Me?  I'm not that interesting.  This should be a short 
conversation."

I chuckled.  "Au contraire, my friend.  You are the most 
interesting person I've ever met.  Sometimes you intrigue 
the hell out of me."

"Do I now?  Didn't know I was that mysterious."

"In many ways, you aren't.  I think I know you as well as 
anybody knows you."

"You know me better than anyone ever has, Scully.  You know 
me better than I know myself sometimes."  I smiled.

"I doubt that.  But there is still plenty about you that I 
don't know."

"Like what?"

"What's your favorite ice cream?"

"Pastachio."

"Who's your favorite author?"

"That's tough, I have a few.  Isaac Asimov, Shakespeare, 
Anne Rice, Alan Dean Foster.  Asimov and Dean Foster are 
sci-fi writers.  Rice is gothic horror and adventure.  For 
poetry, god, I like Shelley and Keats, Whitman, Dickenson, 
Plathe, the list goes on."

"See, I didn't even know you liked poetry.  That's 
interesting."

"How so?"

"It means there's probably a hidden romantic in you."

"You have no idea, my friend."

I smiled at him.  "Oh really?  Why don't you tell me about 
that."

"What do you mean?"

"If you could indulge your romantic side, what would you 
do?"

"You mean in regard to a woman?"

"Yeah."

"Hmm."  He looked off into space.  "I would buy her 
flowers.  I would leave her poems, or phrases from 
philosophers that I think describe her.  I would surprise 
her with little gifts, things I know she likes.  I love 
candle light dinners and slow dancing and cuddling on the 
couch."

"Wow."

"I wouldn't have taken you for the romantic type, either, 
Scully."

"That's kind of sad, isn't it?"

"What?"

"That I've created such an outside shell of professionalism 
and aloofness that people don't even consider that I'm a 
normal woman."

"I do."

"Not if you think that I wouldn't want romance in my life."

He was silent for long moments.

"Do you want romance in your life, Scully?"

"Of course, I do."

"Have anyone in mind?"

I looked at him then and scanned him from head to toe.  
God, he was a gorgeous specimen of manhood, from the tip of 
his spiky hair to the bottom of his lean runner's legs.  I 
looked up again and saw him part his lips and his tongue 
dart out to moisten them, first the top then the bottom.  I 
felt a warm flush flow through my body and pool between my 
legs.  I looked away.  "I don't know.  Sometimes I think I 
have a chance with someone, and other times ... I have no 
clue."

"Someone?"

"Let's back up for a minute.  I lost control of this 
conversation."

"And you like control, don't you, Scully?"

I looked at my lap.  "Yeah, but I don't HAVE to have it."

"I think you do, or you panic."

"Is that why you told me I was in the driver's seat?"

"Partly, and partly because it's true.  Unlike you, I don't 
want the control."

"Why not?"

"Too much responsibility if things go wrong.  And I have 
enough things to be responsible for and feel guilty about 
in my life.  I don't need to add to the pile."

There was silence for several long moments.  "Would you 
like to go out somewhere?"

"Where do you want to go?"

"The Museum of Natural History."

"Back to D.C., huh?"

"Would you mind?"

"No, whatever you want to do." 

"O.K., then, my friend, let's go."

XXXXXXXXXX

My, my, my.  Didn't we change the subject quickly.  
Although Scully seems to be the one plowing forward in this 
discussion, she also seems strangely more hesitant than I 
am right now.  I was the one with all the reservations 
about ruining what we had.

Seeing her nervousness around me brought on this weird 
sense of calm.  It's a weird thing between us.  It's was 
like whatever mood one of us slides into, the other slides 
the other way to balance us out.  It's a good thing most of 
the time, keeps us level headed and capable of going 
forward when we needed to keep going forward.  

On the other hand, it would be a blooming miracle if we 
were ever feeling brave at the same time in regard to 
advancing this relationship.  That's when it will happen.  
I'm sure of it.  But she has to make the first move.  She 
has to.  I just can't.

XXXXXXXXXX

MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY
WASHINGTON, D.C.

We spent several hours at the museum, looking at the 
displays.  We'd both been here a hundred times before, but 
it had been a while for both of us and I enjoyed it.  The 
best part was that half way through, she took up my hand 
again and tugged me through the place room to room, never 
letting go of my hand.  I saw the envious stares of every 
single man that we passed.  They envied that such a 
beautiful woman was towing me around behind her.

At nearly every display, she would launch into a speech 
about it, giving me more history and details than were on 
display there.  I smiled at her enthusiasm and was glad to 
see her relaxed and enjoying herself.  She noticed my 
amusement and swatted me in the shoulder when I laughed at 
her over exuberance.  That only made me laugh harder.  She 
never let go of my hand.  We finally exited the museum and 
decided to walk to the nearest restaurant to get some 
lunch.  It was already 2:00 PM and we were hungry.  She 
started skipping and I stretched out my stride to keep up 
with her.  I'd never seen her like this, carefree and 
relaxed, almost child like. 

She gave a whoop and whirled around, grinning at me and I 
couldn't stop the answering grin that came to my face.  
"Woo Hoo!  God, Mulder, I'm having so much fun.  This is so 
great to just have a day to do whatever I want to do."

Then she leaned her head back and peeled a laugh from the 
back of her throat.  I tugged on her hand which was still 
firmly trapped in mine and spun her into my body, wrapping 
my arms around her. She looked up at me and at that moment, 
smiling, she was the most beautiful creature I'd ever seen.  
I felt my groin tingle and my dick harden.  One hand slid 
down to the small of her back and pulled her hips into me. 

Even through our long wool coats, I knew she could feel my 
hard on.  I croaked out, watching my breath cloud her face 
in the cold.  "You are so incredibly beautiful when you 
laugh, Scully."

The smile in question faded and her lips parted slightly.  
My eyes locked on those berry red, swollen, full lips.  Oh 
God, I only knew it a second before I did it.  I was going 
to kiss her.  I heard myself mumble, "Forgive me, Scully."  

And I let my head drop and captured her lips with mine.  
She froze as I pulled her top lip between mine and gently 
suckled. I had to taste her.  My tongue darted out and 
swiped across her bottom lip, then the top one and she 
gasped.  My tongue slid inside of it's own volition and I 
explored the inside of her mouth.  Then it happened. 

She kissed me back.  Oh lord.  I was totally unprepared for 
the feeling of Scully's mouth pulling on mine.  I was lost 
in the feeling of her warm, hot tongue rolling lazily over 
mine and licking the inside of my mouth.  I groaned deeply 
right into her mouth.  I felt her shudder as she swallowed 
the vibrations of my groan and pulled her even tighter to 
me.  She sucked on my bottom lip and I felt my knees start 
to buckle.

I suddenly remembered that where we were.  We were standing 
on a side walk just a block from the museum in plain sight 
of the world.  I reluctantly broke the kiss and panted 
softly as I rested my forehead on hers.  Her eyes were 
closed.  My dick was throbbing unbearably right now.  I 
pulled my hips away from hers slightly and felt the cold do 
its job to shrink me back down.  "Open your eyes, Scully."

She did.  They were bright blue and her pupils were 
dilated, her eyelids heavy.  "I couldn't help it."

One side of her mouth quirked up.  "S'okay.  I wondered if 
you'd ever get up the nerve to do that.  If you hadn't, I 
would've."  I must have looked as incredulous as I felt 
because she laughed at my expression.  "Come on, let's 
eat."

"You're not angry that I just grabbed you in a public place 
and put you in a lip lock?"

"You could have picked a more discreet place, but no, I'm 
not angry.  No one we know saw us."

"I hope not."

"I doubt it.  And if they did, screw 'em if that can't take 
it! Let's go."  She turned away from me and took one step.  
She turned back when I didn't move.  "Mulder?"

"Yeah?"

"You're a fabulous kisser."

I knew my grin must have looked goofy but I couldn't help 
it.  We proceeded to the diner, hand in hand.

XXXXXXXXXX



PART 2 (NC-17)

DANA SCULLY'S APARTMENT
6:00 PM -SATURDAY EVENING

We spent three hours in the restaurant, eating ourselves 
silly and talking and laughing.  I couldn't remember the 
last time I'd had such a great day and I told him so.  He'd 
grinned at me, so pleased that he was part of it.  I was 
finding it harder and harder to keep my hands to myself.

This discussion and acknowledgement of this 'thing' between 
us was new, but I was like a run away train now that I'd 
let it out that there was something going on here and I 
couldn't seem to rein myself in.

I stood unlocking my door.  He was leaning against the wall 
in the hallway next to my door, looking down at me with a 
contented look on his face.  "Scully."

"Yeah."

"Maybe I should be going now."

I looked at him.  "You've been trying to get away from me 
all day."  I knew I was pouting but I couldn't help it.

"That's not true and you know it.  We've had a great day.  
I'll never forget it.  Seeing you like this was ... 
unbelievable."

I opened the door and yanked him in by his coat lapel.  He 
chuckled but came in.  "What do you mean unbelievable?" I 
asked as I hung up our coats.

"I don't remember the last time I saw you look so happy ... 
so carefree."

"Well, to be honest with you, neither do I."

"That's the point Scully.  You're always with me, running 
around chasing shadows and you don't get to let your hair 
down.  You don't get to go out with friends and skip down 
sidewalks and throw your head back and laugh.  I want that 
for you.  I'm always just holding you back."

Good lord he could be exasperating sometimes.  "Mulder, am 
I mistaken or were you not with me today?"

"Yes, but you were having a good time because you didn't 
have to be anywhere.  You said it yourself.  You were 
having a good time because you have a weekend off and here 
you are hanging out with the guy you spend your whole week 
with.  I mean, you were feeling so happy because ..."

I cut him off.  "Because I was with you, Mulder."

He went silent and stared at me.  He opened his mouth and 
shut it again as I walked up to him and put my hands on his 
chest. I felt him stiffen but I grabbed his wrists and 
placed his hands on my hips.   He looked like he was about 
to bolt.  My hands slid up his chest to his shoulders and I 
reveled in his deep intake of breath.  "Scul...ly."

"Mmm?"

"Oh God.  What's going on here Scully?"

I pressed my cheek to his breastbone.  God he was tall.  I 
rarely wore sneakers around him.  "I can't get that kiss 
out of my mind, Mulder."

"No?"

"No.  I'm wondering if I imagined that it was so good."  I 
felt his heart beat speed up against my cheek.  "I'm 
wondering if it was a fluke.  If you just kissed me because 
of an impulse, a spur of the moment thing seeing me happy 
and laughing."

"Or?"  His voice was low and thick.

"Or if it was a kiss you'd been wanting to give me for a 
while and suddenly you had the opportunity so you took it."

He murmured.  "Both. It was spur of the moment and it was 
something I've wanted to do for a long time."

"Ahh, now we're getting somewhere."  I could feel his eyes 
on the top of my head but didn't look up just yet.  His 
hands were holding my hips gently, not pressing, not 
pulling.  There was still an inch between our bodies and I 
stepped in to press myself against him from my head to my 
hips.  Heat!  As soon as I was pressed against him his 
hands tightened on my hips and I could feel his erection 
pressing into my belly.  Oh man, just the feel of it sent 
moisture flooding between my legs.

"Scully?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you coming on to me?"

"Yup."

"O.K., just checking."

I began to giggle.  I couldn't help it.  He sounded so lost 
and was trying so hard to sound casual.  'Just checking!'  
Oh lord.  "Mulder, you crack me up," I said between 
giggles.

I looked up to find him grinning at my giggling fit.  "I 
crack you up, huh?  How come?"

"It's so hard to give you a hint.  Do I need a 
sledgehammer?  You're making me work way to hard for this."

"Work to hard for what?"  He was on the verge of chuckling 
but wasn't even sure what he was laughing at.  He was 
unsure whether this was funny or if I was insulting him.

"You're making me work way too hard to get you to kiss me 
again."

His smile faded instantly and he stared at me.  His hands 
flew up to my face and held me in place as his lips fell on 
mine.  He kissed me hard, with passion, his tongue sweeping 
the inside of my mouth and dueling with my tongue.  Then he 
pulled back and kissed me tenderly, sucking my tongue into 
his mouth and sucking on each of my lips in turn.  My head 
was spinning and I sagged against him as my knees turned to 
water.  His arms came down and banded around my waist, 
holding me upright.  He left my mouth and gulped in air but 
moved to my neck, nibbling his way down to my collar bone.  
His tongue was hot and wet and insistent, lapping hard 
against my pulse and I moaned so deeply that I didn't even 
recognize my own voice.  

He finally pulled back and looked at me with heavy lidded 
eyes, dark with desire.  I shivered, trying to catch my 
breath.  "Wasn't ... a fluke.  Definitely ... wasn't a 
fluke."

He smiled and slowly walked me backwards until we were 
standing beside my coach.  He sat down and fell backwards, 
lying down and taking me with him.  I was now sprawled on 
top of him.  He didn't say a word.  He was waiting, 
watching, to see what I would do.  I ran my hands up under 
his turtleneck and traced every rib and muscle, reveling in 
the feel of his muscles rippling under my touch.  I brushed 
his nipples with my thumb and he moaned, flexing his 
hardness into the juncture of my thighs.  I sat up, 
straddling him and lowered my core on top of the sizeable 
bulge in his worn jeans.  He gasped and then groaned as I 
began grinding myself in a circular motion on top of him.  
His hips immediately flexed and began thrusting gently 
against me.  

We were both grunting and moaning quietly now.  His hands 
slid up under my shirt and squeezed both my breasts.  I 
gasped and then whimpered as he began pinching my nipples 
through the fabric of my flimsy bra.  I lowered my face to 
him and we began to kiss again.  I couldn't believe we were 
doing this, dry humping on my sofa like a couple of 
teenagers, but that's where it was at.  And right now, it 
felt so good, I had no intention of stopping.  

I reached down and unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans.  His 
hands immediately slid under my waistband and began cupping 
my ass and squeezing in time to my motions.  I shifted so 
that the head of this erection was pushing the hard seam of 
my jeans right into my clit.  The sound that came out of my 
throat was deep and wet, almost a gurgle.

He shouted, "Scully, Jesus!" He yanked me by the ass hard 
against his groin and ground into me hard and the same time 
his mouth came up and sucked on my neck.  I squeaked in 
surprise as I felt my clit throb painfully and then release 
a wash of tremors that spread through my womb.  My core 
walls sputtered frantically and I shouted his name as I the 
unexpected orgasm rippled through me.  

I forced my eyes open just in time to see his head thrown 
back and hear him shout my name and he ground harshly into 
my crotch and rocked his hips as he came.  I watched his 
body spasm several times and then go still.  He opened his 
eyes and looked at me.  An embarrassed smile appeared on 
his face.

He covered his eyes with one arm.  "Christ, Scully, I 
haven't done that since I was a teenager!  I'm sorry, it's 
been a while."

I chuckled and he lifted his arm to peer at my from 
underneath it.  I grinned at him.  "For both of us, I 
guess, or did you just miss my orgasm?"

He snorted and took his arm away and we both dissolved into 
laughter.  All that nervous tension just finally busted out 
and we were helpless to control its release.  In the 
aftermath of our orgasms, there was nothing to do but laugh 
like idiots at the sheer joy that comes from release held 
so long at bay.  When we finally settled down, I kissed him 
gently.  "I have some boxers and sweats of yours here if 
you would like to change."

"Uh, yeah, the boxers anyway.  I'll have to see if there 
was any damage to the jeans.  Oh God, Scully, I feel like a 
total jerk!"

"Don't.  I didn't expect that to happen either but it was 
fun."

"Yeah, it was definitely the most fun I've had in years!"

I swallowed heavily.  "Years?"

His grin faded and he locked his eyes to mine.  "Yeah, 
years, Scully.  Years."

"How many?"

He was silent a moment and then, "Five."

"Five years?!"

"You didn't ... I mean you weren't ... with ... "

"Wasn't with who, Scully?  Who did you think I'd been 
with?"

"Phoebe."

"No.  Thought about it, but stopped myself in time before 
she could make me a cuckold again."

"Diana?"

"Diana?!  No!  Scully, what would make you think...?"

He pulled me to him and hugged me tightly.  His lips came 
down to my ear.  "I haven't been with anyone since you came 
back."

"Came back?  From ..."

"From being taken by Duane Barry."

"Oh, why not?  You've certainly had opportunities.  
Detective White would have jumped your bones, Phoebe or 
Diana, or ... probably even Marita."

He chuckled.  "You've thought about this a lot, huh?"

"Yeah."  I almost whispered now, embarrassed that I'd 
revealed how closely I'd watched out for his 
'opportunities.'

"I haven't been with anyone since then because when you 
were gone, that's when I realized that I ..."

"Realized what?"

He was silent a moment.  "Let's talk about this some other 
time."

"Oh, no, mister!  No way!  Realized what?!"  I grabbed his 
face in my hands and forced him to look at me.  "Tell me.  
Damn it, Mulder, don't run from me now."

He looked undecided and I saw the fear flash in his eyes 
but he closed them.  When they opened he had a resigned 
look on his face.  He knew I was not going to let this go.  
His voice was raspy and barely above a whisper.  "That's 
when I realized I was in love with you.  And I'd never told 
you."

I was silent, letting him think and letting him see that I 
wasn't bolting away from him.  I was flooded with a warm 
tingling feeling hearing his words.  He was in love with 
me.  My voice was small, "You realized you loved me?"

"I realized I was IN LOVE with you.  I already knew I loved 
you."  I couldn't help the tears that welled up in my eyes.

I kissed him gently and then pulled back.  His thumbs wiped 
the tears off my face.  I'd insisted that he tell me.  I'd 
pushed him to tell me things and I wasn't being nearly as 
forthcoming.  The physical stuff was one thing, but the 
emotional stuff was much more important.  I couldn't keep 
expecting him to give and give and get nothing.  He was 
already frightened to give that much of himself.  I locked 
my gaze with his again.  "That's good news."

"It is?"

"Yeah, it is."

"How come?"

"Because I'm in love with you too, Mulder."

"Oh God, Scully."  He pulled me to him and kissed me 
roughly, squeezing me until I could barely breath.  I 
pushed gently to rise away from him and he let my lips go.

"You're going to suffocate me."

He chuckled.  "Ooppss.  Sorry!"

"No problem, but uh, I'm feeling a little sticky here, so I 
think I'm going to take a shower and then I'll let you take 
one if you want one.  Or you can just clean up with a 
washcloth."

"A shower would be good."

"O.K."

I got up and trotted into the bedroom.  I yanked a pair of 
his sweats and underwear from an overnight bag that he kept 
here and handed them to him.  I grabbed my own sweats and 
clean underwear and headed for the bathroom.  I stripped 
and jumped into the shower.  My head was spinning, 
replaying the whole scene on the couch when I heard the 
bathroom door open.  "Mulder?"

"Yeah, it's me."  He sounded unsure.  "Scully?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I come in?"

"You need the toilet?"

"No, I mean, can I come in ... in there with you?"

I gasped.  Oh God, he wanted to shower with me? I still 
hadn't seen his body in all it's glory, uninjured.  We'd 
both just had orgasms out there but we hadn't removed any 
clothing!  I heard him mumble, "Forget it, Scully.  I'm 
sorry.  I..."

I don't know who's controlling my tongue these days but I 
blurted out, "Get in here Mulder."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"I promise to behave.  I just want to see you."

"Get in here."

He tentatively slid the shower door back and stepped in 
behind me.  I kept my back to him.  I heard him pull in a 
tiny gasp.  My body tingled.  I swear I could feel every 
place his eyes touched me.  I warm trail spread down my 
back and over my butt and down my legs.  My hair was full 
of shampoo.  I was feeling rather emboldened by recent 
events.  Yesterday I would have laughed if you told me I 
would be so bold.  But knowing he wanted me made all my 
little insecurities fade away.  I took a deep breath and 
turned around quickly, tipping my head back under the water 
to rinse my hair.  I heard him make a sound something like, 
"Hhuuhh."

My eyes were closed as I raised my hands to move my hair 
around to rinse the soap.  I gasped when I felt a soapy 
hand land on my shoulder.  He paused but then began running 
his soapy hands all over my chest.  He went over my 
breasts, over my ribs and down my stomach.  He stopped and 
I opened my eyes to see him rolling a bar of soap between 
his hands.  He murmured, "You're so beautiful, Scully."

I made no secret of ogling his body.  He was magnificent.  
It was the third week in December and he still looked like 
he had a slight tan.  His pecs stood out in stark relief 
against the shadows in the shower.  His abdomen was a firm, 
solid six pack, showing every muscle, not too big, just 
right.  His torso tapered to a narrow waist with lean hips 
and then flared out into muscular, elongated thighs 
sprinkled with dark hair.  The line of hair below his navel 
thickened and emptied into a dark nest surrounding his 
penis, which was only semi-erect, drooping away from his 
body to lay gently against his thigh.  Holy shit.  He 
wasn't fully erect and he looked big. 

I stared like a shameless hussy at his crotch and watched 
as his cock stiffened and lazily leapt up from his thigh.  
I could actually see it grow larger with every pulse.  I 
don't think I'd ever actually watched this happen. I was 
fascinated and couldn't seem to take my eyes off it.  I 
knew my face was burning up with embarrassment but I 
couldn't look away.  I felt my nipples harden and my 
breathing sped up as I continued to stare.  It stood out 
proudly from its nest of hair now and I licked my suddenly 
dry lips.  I heard a little moan from him and it surged up 
closer to his body, thickening and growing longer.  I made 
the weirdest sound in the back of my throat.  "Mulder, 
you're beautiful." I whispered.

"Hhuuhh, tha...thanks."  I stepped forward and wrapped one 
hand around him and shivered in reaction to feeling him 
jump and twitch in my hand.  He was like hard silk in my 
hand.  I began stroking him and he dropped the soap, 
bracing himself against the wall of the shower and the 
glass door.  I dropped to my knees.  

Where the wanton hussy in me came from, I'll never know.  
I'd never particularly had any special love for fellatio, 
but right now all I could think about was what he would 
taste like in my mouth.  I murmured, "I want to taste you."

He groaned, low and deep in the back of his throat as I 
gently slid my lips down his shaft.  I grasped the base and 
pumped gently as I began to stroke and suck him gently, 
swishing my tongue along the underside of his shaft.  I 
felt wild glee when I felt his knees buckle and then his 
attempt to lock them.  I used one hand to fondle his balls 
creating a constant grunting moan.  I liked that sound!  I 
could listen to that all night.  

He sounded like he was in ecstasy and I had a surge of 
feminine pride surge through me that I could do this to 
him.  He was so thick, there was no way I could take him 
all, but I took as much as I could and used my hand for the 
rest. I began moving the base of his shaft in a circular 
motion.  He shouted, "Oh yeah, Scully, perfect, just like 
that.  Just like that, oh God, yeah!"

I'd found something he liked.  I continued the squeezing 
and circular motion and sucked hard on end of his shaft, 
hollowing my cheeks with the effort.  I could feel the deep 
slow pulses in his shaft and it made me dizzy.  He gasped 
out, "Scully, I'm ... I'm gonna ... come.  I'm gonna come."

I sucked harder, squeezed harder and sped up the circular 
motion at the base of his shaft.  I felt him expand in my 
mouth in one giant slow motion pulse and then explode in my 
mouth.  His hips thrust into my face.  I knew he had no 
control.  I had a good enough grip on him that he didn't 
gag me.  I swallowed each spray of cum that hit the back of 
my throat.  He was shouting a wordless sound, mixed with my 
name and it was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard.  

My hands went to his thighs and I could feel them quivering 
as I lapped him clean, feeling him deflate in my mouth.  
"Holy Shit, Scully!"  He was panting.  

I stood up with my cheeks flaming.  He grabbed me and 
kissed me, tasting himself on my tongue.  I said, "I never 
promised to behave." 

He laughed then, a full throated belly laugh and I realized 
how handsome and utterly sexy he was when he smiled and 
laughed.  I maneuvered him under the spray and washed his 
back while he washed his hair.  When he finished he looked 
at me and said, "Seems I owe you, Agent Scully."

"You don't owe me anything Mulder. I wanted to do it."

"Maybe so.  And I can't tell you, by the way, how happy it 
makes me to know that you are willing to do that.  But 
regardless, I still want to do something for you."  He spun 
me around to face the spray and soaped his hands.  One went 
to work on my breasts, and one went to work between my 
legs.  His mouth began attacking my neck.  In about two 
seconds flat I was putty in his arms and moaning like a 
whore.  He was so much taller than me that he could reach 
everything at once and it was a new experience for me.

His three fingers plunged in and out of me while his other 
hand pinched and rolled my nipple.  My hands went above me 
to lock behind his neck and hold myself upright.  He 
stopped plunging his fingers and brought the heel of his 
hand down on my clit and began grinding it into my pubic 
bone.  I shattered and screamed his name and white lights 
flashed behind my eyelids.  My vaginal walls grabbed for 
his fingers in a death grip trying to pull them deeper and 
my nipples hardened painfully.  I shouted as he pinched one 
nipple hard and felt my body flutter again.  He held me as 
I came back to earth.  I slowly opened my eyes, tipping my 
head back to rest on his chest.  "Wow."

He chuckled.  "I take it that means it was decent?"

"Decent?  Way beyond decent.  Incredible."

He snuggled me close and kissed my cheek.  "Good.  Now the 
water's getting cold, let's get out of here."

I hadn't even noticed.  I turned it off and we hopped out, 
drying each other with my big oversized towels and taking 
our time to explore each other's bodies.  "Well, this is a 
first for me."

"What?"

"I've had two orgasms today and I still haven't ... "

He grinned.  "There's more than one way to skin a cat."

We began to yank on our clothes.

"Yeah, I guess so, but ..."

"I don't think I'm up for another round, I'm getting to be 
an old man, you know?"

I chuckled.  "I wasn't insinuating that we should.  I just 
think it's weird.  It's not the way I pictured it the first 
time with us."

"Since when do we ever do anything by the book?"

"Never."

XXXXXXXXXX

Sex makes me hungry and thirsty.  Despite the enormous meal 
we'd eaten late this afternoon, I wanted something.  I cut 
up some cheese and grabbed some crackers and we retired to 
the living room.  I turned on the stereo with some light 
jazz and curled up against Mulder on the couch.  We both 
released heavy sighs at the same time and then laughed.

XXXXXXXXXX

I don't remember ever being this happy or relaxed.  I know 
that sounds ridiculous and trite but it's true.  I'm in 
love and my partner just gave me the best blow job of my 
life in the shower!  How did that happen?!

She has no idea how many dreams and fantasies I had about 
that mouth.  Seeing those swollen red lips wrapped around 
my cock will go down as one of the most incredible sights 
of my life.  I close my eyes and I can see a snap shot of 
it against my lids.  I think my heart stopped when she said 
I could get into in the shower with her.  It had taken me 
several minutes to get up the courage to ask.  I didn't 
want to push things, but she seemed to be willing.  After 
all, she'd just dry humped me on her couch, which was 
certainly more than I ever would have expected so soon 
after our strange little talk.

From being afraid to kiss her to having her suck on my dick 
in one day!  How had this happened so fast?  It was 
careening out of control, but I had no desire to stop it 
despite my fears that this could be a disaster for our 
working relationship.  I couldn't turn this rig around now, 
no how, no way.  I was starved for intimacy. I'd tasted 
ambrosia and I was hooked, like an addict.

I knew I was wearing a goofy grin as I sat there on the 
couch with the woman of my dreams tucked under my arm, her 
head against my chest.  She was dribbling cracker crumbs on 
my turtleneck and I couldn't care less.  She looks so 
contented and ... sated.  Knowing I put that look there is 
a humbling feeling.  You would think I would be feeling 
like beating my chest right now, but I don't.  I'm still 
too amazed.  I'm waiting for her to tell me to leave.  

My chest squeezes tight at that thought.  I don't want to 
leave.  I don't want this spell to be broken.  I'm afraid 
that if I leave, tomorrow or the next day, she will be all 
awkward and embarrassed around me.  I don't want her to 
regret what went on here today.  Even though she initiated 
most of it, that doesn't mean that once I'm gone, she won't 
think she made a huge mistake.  I swallowed and tried to 
push these thoughts to the back of my head.  But it wasn't 
easy.  I'm not used to having something this good happen to 
me.  I was waiting for the other shoe to drop.  But how was 
I supposed to NOT get my hopes up now.  I knew I was 
setting my heart up for a fall, but I was helpless to 
prevent it.

She'd said she loved me.  Why was that so hard to believe?  
She'd become the center of my universe over the last seven 
years.  Why wouldn't I have become important to her?  
Important, yes, but a man worth loving?  Intellectually, I 
knew my self-esteem was destroyed by my parents and Phoebe 
and a variety of others.  

I knew I shouldn't feed into it.  But I couldn't help it.  
After all I'd put her through, after all the pain I'd 
caused her, I was amazed she was still my friend, let alone 
had any other feelings for me.  I was hesitant to believe 
it.  At the same time, my Scully didn't lie.

My Scully?  Oh boy. Careful, old boy, don't go getting all 
possessive now.  Aren't I already?  Great, how many Mulders 
were talking in my head now?  "Scully?"

"Yeah?"

"I have a question for you."

"Shoot."

"What's happening here?"

"Could you be more specific?"

"This is going to sound stupid, but, are we ... dating?"

She chuckled.  "I guess you could say that, although I 
think we're way past that stage.  Dating usually involves 
getting to know one another and I think we got that covered 
a long time ago.  But yes, there are still things we don't 
know about one another and things I would like to do with 
you.  There are places I would like to go with you."

"I need to tell you something."

"What."

I caught her chin with my fingers and tilted it up to look 
into her face.  "I need to know if we are ... exclusive."

"Exclusive?"

"If this is going to continue ... "

"Of course it's going to continue."

"Are we a couple now?"  I blurted it out, feeling foolish 
but needing to know.

She smiled.  "Yes."

I felt a melting sensation in my chest.  "I want ... no, I 
need for us to be ... monogamous, Scully.  Before, I might 
have been able to take seeing you date someone else.  I 
would have gone nuts, but I would have had nothing to say 
about it.  But now ... if I saw you with someone else ... "

"You'd what?"

"I'd probably kill them."

She laughed a tinkling sort of laugh that made me feel 
silly at the same time I enjoyed the sound of it.  She 
peered at me again and saw that I wasn't amused.  "I'm 
sorry, Mulder, it just sounded so ... so ... "

"Neanderthal?"

"Well, yeah."

"I mean it, Scully.  If we are together, we are TOGETHER, 
in every way, and that means no one else, ever.  I might be 
a caveman, but I have to be honest with you.  If I saw you 
with someone else, I can't say with any certainty that I'd 
be responsible for my actions."

She smiled gently at me.  "Well, to put your fears to rest, 
dear caveman; there is no one else.  There hasn't been 
anyone else in a long, long time.  And I don't anticipate 
there is EVER being anyone else."  She paused.  "I tried a 
couple of times."

"Tried?"

"Tried to date some men."  I clenched my jaw, not sure if I 
wanted to hear this.  She reached up and ran her finger 
down my jaw.  "Unclench your teeth, caveman, you'll like 
this story."

I opened my mouth and flexed my jaw back and forth in an 
exaggerated fashion.  She smirked at me.  "O.K., tell me 
this story I'm going to like."

"Twice.  Two different men.  One was a doctor who asked me 
out when we were out on a case in Virginia."

"Where?"

"Doesn't matter.  Here's the point.  To anyone looking in 
from the outside, he was perfect.  He was in his late 
thirties, unmarried, no kids, and a successful medical 
examiner.  He was muscular with blonde hair and blue eyes."

"That's enough."

She smirked again.  "So I said yes, because I couldn't come 
up with any reason not to and I wanted to have a night out.  
I was so tired of being alone at night."

"Oh God."

"Easy boy.  I went to dinner and it was a disaster, at 
least from my point of view."

"Why?"

"He kept asking about our work and I tried to explain what 
we do and some of the cases in layman's terms that he would 
understand."

"He was a doctor, I wouldn't think you'd need layman's 
terms for him."

"Not for the medical stuff, but the paranormal stuff.  So 
much of what we do and what we've seen, when you put it 
into to words, it just sounds ridiculous."

"Thanks."

"I don't mean it that way and you know it!  I know it's not 
ridiculous and I know what we've seen and yet, to try and 
explain it to someone else, it comes out sounding like a 
bad science fiction movie sometimes, you know?"

"I guess you're right."

"So by the end of the night he thought I was a nut case."

"I'm sorry, Scully."

"For what?"

"You can't even go out and have a normal dinner date 
without being tainted by me and what we do."

"You know, Mulder, this self-flagellation party you have 
going on really annoys the piss out of me sometimes.  As 
usual, you are missing the point entirely."

"Then what is the point."

"The point is that you and the X-Files are such a huge and 
integral part of my life that I can't even enjoy talking to 
other people sometimes now.  I mean, sometimes I can, but 
there's no one else in the world that I can talk to besides 
you that understands how this shit mixes up your emotions, 
challenges your beliefs, stresses you out."  She paused.

"So I win your company by default?"

"No!  Damn it, Mulder!  Why do you have to be so negative?"

"I don't know.  I'm not used to having good things happen 
to me.  And I find it hard to believe that a gorgeous, 
brilliant, capable woman like you could love me."

"Why not?"  I looked at her as if to say, 'isn't it 
obvious.'  "Oh, Mulder.  I don't know how you manage to 
twist everything so quickly.  First, let me finish the 
story."

"O.K."  I was resigned and felt foolish for interrupting 
her with my pity party in the first place.  I knew how 
unattractive that was, but as with so many other things, 
self-pity and I were intimate friends.

"I tried to steer the conversation around to Greg's life."

"Greg?"

"Yeah, that was his name.  Anyway, he told me about his 
schooling, his residency, his house in the 'burbs, his 
vacations to Aspen to ski every year."

"And?"

"Bboohooorrrriiinnnggg!"

I laughed now.  "Boring, huh?  Sounds pretty nice to me."

"Risking life and limb on the ski slope?  Nope, not for me.  
My idea of a vacation is quiet time on my couch with no 
monsters to chase, no danger to confront and no chance of 
bodily injury."

I chuckled.  "Yeah, I suppose we get enough of that during 
the week."

"Exactly.  And it's exciting and it's interesting and it's 
intriguing.  Working with you makes me think, hard.  It 
makes me test my beliefs and see how strong they really 
are.  It makes me push the envelope of my skills and makes 
me color outside the lines.  You challenge me in a way that 
no one else ever has."

I looked at her now, smiling.  "Who can compare to you, 
Mulder?"  She began changing from her own voice to a 
disguised low one.  "He says, <voice low> 'last week we had 
a doozy', guy died from some parasite that ate up his 
intestines. What's one the weirdest things you ever saw? // 
<her own voice> Well, I chased a liver eating mutant who 
consumes five livers every 40 years and then goes into 
hibernation.  // <voice low> Oh, well, the week before that 
my friend Chad broke his leg on the ski slope and I had to 
set the leg right there on the slope with his own skis! // 
<her own voice> Oh, well once, I cut up a dead guy who had 
striated muscle tissue all over his body and could make 
himself appear like anybody he wanted to. //  <voice low> 
Oh, I can top that!  There was this one guy who I autopsied 
who's stomach blew up from drinking too much Alka-Seltzer 
too quickly! // <her own voice> Oh, boy, that is just soooo 
interesting!"

I was laughing, holding my sides by the time she was 
finished.  She was grinning at my reaction and smiling so 
wide I could see every tooth in her head.  I wiped the 
tears from my face and gasped for breath.  "Oh, Jesus, 
Scully!"

"What?"

"I know you have a wicked sense of humor, but you're 
usually so dry.  You rarely cut loose like that for me.  I 
love it!"

She grinned again.  "I'll have to do it more often then."

"Please do."  I coughed and cleared my throat, bringing 
myself under control again.

"Do you get my point now?"

"Yeah, I guess I do.  I still feel bad that those normal 
lives don't interest you though."

"They do, to a point, but not like they used to.  I still 
want some of those things."

"Which ones?"

"I want a steady man in my life.  I want to settle down 
someday and have a house instead of an apartment.  But I 
wouldn't give up the excitement of the work for anything.  
I feel like we make a difference Mulder.  I know sometimes 
it doesn't feel like it.  Sometimes it feels like we're 
shoveling shit against the tide, but if we don't do it, who 
is going to?  And I'll confess.  It excites me.  I'm proud 
of the work we do.  I enjoy being outside the mainstream.  
I don't even know if I could go back to regular 
investigations anymore."

I looked at her seriously again.  "You are the most 
incredible woman in the world, do you know that?"

"Thank you.  I think you're pretty incredible yourself.  
That's my point, Mulder.  You made my life exciting.  You 
made me love figuring things out.  You gave my skills a 
unique place to shine.  And every man I come in contact 
with, I compare them to you."

"Uh, oh."

She grinned.  "And they come up short.  They come up way, 
way short, Mulder."

I felt the tears choke the back of my throat.  "God, 
Scully, you're fucking delusional, but I love you for it."

She whooped and launched herself into my arms.  "Here's to 
being delusional, partner!"

She kissed me.  Tenderly.  She kissed me again.  
Insistently.  And she kissed me again, with hunger.  She 
swallowed my breath and had me screaming for air inside a 
couple of minutes.  She finally broke the kiss.  "Let's 
clear this up once and for all and then I don't want to 
hear another word about it.  We are dating, but more than 
dating.  We are a couple.  You are my man.  I am your 
woman.  And we are monogamous.  And hopefully, soon, I'll 
be your lover for real."

Whoosh.  No more breath left here.  Nuh, uh, no more.  I 
squeaked, "Lover for real?"

There was that grin again, the one I'd seen more in the 
past day than I'd seen in the last seven years.  It was 
wily and predatory and it gave me an illicit thrill because 
it was aimed directly right at me.  Her lips lowered to my 
ear and she licked her way around the shell of my ear, 
making me shiver before she whispered.  "Yes, very soon, I 
want that gorgeous, huge hunk of meat between your legs 
buried inside me."

Gorgeous, huge hunk of meat?  Scully talked dirty?  God 
help me.  I was in so much trouble. "Ahhh, God, Scully! 
Jesus!  Are you trying to kill me here?" I exclaimed.

She giggled.  I could get addicted to that sound.  She 
obviously delighted in rocking my world.  I was seeing a 
side of her that I knew not many men had been privileged to 
see.  The sensual Scully.  The horny Scully.  The wild 
Scully.  Yes, there was a lot to learn about my enigmatic 
partner.  And more than I ever realized, there were many 
undiscovered layers.  I couldn't wait to start exploring.

"Let's go to bed," she said suddenly.

"Huh?"

"You know, Mulder, bed.  That thing in there with covers 
and four legs and a mattress."

"Smart ass!"

"I'm tired.  All this excitement wore me out."

"I'm a little played out myself."

She stood and led me into her bedroom.  And began to strip.  
Now, I'd just seen her in the shower.  I'd just had my 
fingers inside her and my hands on her naked breasts, with 
her gorgeous little bum pressed against my groin not three 
hours ago and still I felt like I must be dreaming.  Scully 
was stripping in front of me.  What would she wear to bed?  
I don't know why it surprised me, but when she was naked, 
she threw back the covers and crawled in.  Naked.  She's 
sleeping naked.  She turned to look at me staring stupidly 
at her.  "Are you coming, Mulder?  Or are you going to 
sleep standing there all night?" Her voice was a total 
tease.

I shook my head and pulled my shirt over my head, laying it 
on the chair.  I didn't want to leave a mess around her 
apartment.  She smiled at my attempts not to litter my 
clothes all over her floor.  I couldn't tell if she was 
pleased or amused.  Either way, I dropped my sweats and put 
them on the chair too.  I started toward the bed and she 
raised one eyebrow in the air.  I stopped.  "What?"

"What's with the boxers, Mulder?"

"I thought you'd be more comfortable ... "

"With you naked, yes I would."

My jaw dropped open again.  I hooked my thumbs in the 
elastic of my boxer briefs and yanked them down, tossing 
them on top of the rest of my clothes.  I turned to face 
her again and she held up a hand.  "Stop a second, I want 
to look at you."

I felt very self-conscious all of a sudden, even though she 
hadn't seemed to have any complaints in the shower.  Just 
as before, her gaze was blazing a fire trail down my body. 
I felt my balls spasm and my cock harden before her gaze.  
I couldn't remember the last time I got hard more than 
twice in twenty four hours.  And I jerked off a lot!  But 
then again, I had only my fantasies and memories of small 
glimpses of her body to fuel my arousal then.  Now I had a 
very naked, very real Scully staring at my body like she 
wanted to eat me alive.  I teased her, "Do you like what 
you see, partner?"

"Oh yeah!"

I grinned.  "Good, I wasn't sure I would measure up."

She cackled.  "Surely you jest!"

"No," I said slowly.

"Mulder, you really have no idea how handsome and sexy you 
are, do you?"

"That's absurd!"

"No it's not.  You don't see all the women ogling and 
drooling where ever we go?"

"They do not!"

"Yes, partner.  They do.  And not only that, they shoot me 
dirty looks, because they think you're with me."  She 
paused.  "And I luuvv it!  I don't give them any reason to 
think otherwise."

I crawled onto the bed and scooted up to her, laying on my 
side.  "And how do you manage that?"

"I give them the look."

"What look?"

She rolled up on her side facing me and made eye contact.  
Her eyes squinted slightly, her lips pursed, and her chin 
tilted down slightly.  I leaned back involuntarily.  Good 
god, I'd never seen that look on her face.  Her eyes were 
flashing.  She looked like an angry lioness ready to defend 
her cub.  Her face relaxed into its normal pose and she 
smiled at me.  "That look.  The 'you touch, you die' look."

I chortled and flopped onto my back.  "Scully, are you ever 
going to stop surprising me because I don't know how much 
more I can take!"

Without warning, she rolled over swiftly and rolled right 
up onto my chest, her elbows on the mattress under my arms 
and her legs dangling between mine.  "Get used to it Agent 
Mulder.  You've created a monster."

"Have I?"

"Yes, and I intend to pull out all the stops."

"All the stops?"

"Yeah, all the things I've been holding back.  All the 
looks, all the words.  They're going to come out now and if 
I've shocked you already, then you're in for one hell of a 
ride, so you better buckle up and hang on tight!"

All I could think about at that moment was, 'I could die a 
happy man now,' and 'I knew I'd never enjoyed being in 
trouble so much in my entire life!'

XXXXXXXXXX

SUNDAY MORNING
6:00 AM

We managed not to get out of hand over night.  I knew I'd 
shocked him and I didn't want to move too fast and make him 
pull away again.  I knew he was scared and I knew why.  I 
wouldn't hurt him like those others had.  I wasn't capable 
of it because I was in love with him.  He was afraid of 
ruining our partnership and that was a valid fear.  But I 
would never leave him.  

I woke up cocooned in a warm tangle of arms and legs and 
Mulder scent.  I snuggled closer, pressing my back into his 
chest.  His arm tightened around my middle and he smacked 
his chops like a contented kid and buried his nose in my 
hair.  I heard him murmur, "Scully."  Then he went still as 
he drifted into deeper sleep again.

I wondered when the last time was that he'd slept eight 
hours?  If he had felt safe enough to do that here then 
that was icing on the cake.  He hadn't had one nightmare 
either.

SUNDAY MORNING
8:00 AM 

Baalinng!

The phone's ringing.

I reached out blindly toward my nightstand to grab it and 
my hand landed on ... skin!  I jerked awake and looked down 
at a crown of red hair sticking out from the top of the 
covers.

Baalinng!

Scully.  I'm still here.  I spent the night in Scully's 
bed!  I spent the night with a naked Scully!  Hoo boy!

Baalinng!

She wasn't moving and the phone was still ringing.  I shook 
her gently, "Scully?  Phone."  She mumbled and burrowed 
deeper.  I probably shouldn't have answered her phone, but 
I can't stand a ringing phone.

Baalinng!

I levered up on one arm and leaned over her to grab the 
phone from her nightstand.  I wrenched the receiver to me, 
pulling the light weight princess phone off the nightstand.  
As it crashed to the floor with a clunk and rink from the 
innards of it's shell, I uttered a frustrated, "SHIT!" 
right into the mouthpiece of the phone.

<Hello?>

"Yeah?  Sorry.  Hello?"  I flop down onto my back as 
Scully's head pokes above the covers, grinning like an imp.

<Perhaps I have the wrong number.  I'm awfully sorry, sir.>

"Maggie?"

Silence.  Then.  <Fox?>

I mumbled another, "Oh, shit!"  Then louder, "Yeah, Mrs. 
Scully, it's me, hold on a minute."  I handed the phone to 
Scully.  "Your mother," stating the obvious.

Dana grinned evilly at me and said, "Hi, Mom,  Sorry, the 
phone fell on the floor.  What are you doing calling so 
early on a Sunday morning?"

I could vaguely hear Maggie chuckling.  Scully leaned over 
to cradle the phone between us so I could hear.

<Dana, honey, what's Fox doing there so early this morning?  
Are you leaving on another case?  Or did he spend the 
night?>

"Which answer will garner the most favor with you?"

<Well, I hope he spent the night.>

"You do?"

<Yeah, it's about time!>

"Mom!"  Now I chuckled.  Well, well.  I had the approval of 
the Scully family matriarch.  Things couldn't be all bad.  
"And this is your business ... how?"

I looked at Scully incredulously.  She wasn't going to get 
pissy with her mother was she?

<Don't get sassy with me, young lady.  I'm all for it.  I'm 
doing cartwheels over here.>

"Ooh, I'd pay to see that!"

<Figuratively, Dana.  I've been wondering when you would 
finally wake up and jump that boys bones.>

"Mom!"  Scully was turning bright red.  "We didn't actually 
... I mean, we did ... something ... but ... "  She paused.  
I raised my eyebrow, grinning and wondering how she was 
going to get out of this one.  "Why am I explaining this to 
you?"

I could hear her mother's laughter peeling out of the 
phone.  <Oh, Dana.  You're priceless.  You don't have to 
explain a thing to me.  Just know that I whole heartedly 
approve.  That man loves you to pieces.  No ones ever going 
to love you the way he does and you'd be a fool to let that 
get away.  He won't wait forever, you know?  If you haven't 
jumped him, don't wait too long.>

"Mom!  Jeezz!"

<Yes, dear?>  She sounded perfectly innocent and I was 
enjoying seeing someone fluster the unflappable Dr. Scully.  
Good to know someone could do it.

"Why did you call, Mom?"

<Christmas.  We need to make plans.>

"What's up this year?"

<Neither Bill nor Charlie can make it home, naturally.  But 
I'm going to ask Tara and Rena to come over on Christmas 
Eve, and I want you and Fox to come to.  No presents, we're 
all adults.  We'll just have a nice dinner.  Rena and Tara 
will spend the night and we can have the kids open their 
packages in the morning.  You and Fox are welcome to stay 
over as well.  That's up to you.  Casual dress.  Let's just 
have a nice time.  I don't want the girls alone with their 
kids on Christmas.>

I looked at Scully and began wondering if the mention of 
her sister-in-laws' kids would upset her.  But she was 
smiling.  "Sounds good.  We probably won't spend the night.  
I was going to have a little dinner party here on Christmas 
Day.

I looked at her puzzled.  I'd known nothing about it and 
wondered if I had been going to be invited.  <That's fine 
dear.  Now go pay attention to your new boyfriend.  I have 
to go to church.>

"Bye, Mom!"

<Good bye, dear and give Fox a kiss for me.>

"Oh, I will."  And she hung up.  We both lay there smiling 
at each other.  "Well, that went better than I expected."

"For sure.  What's this about a dinner party?"

"I have a little plan."

"Oh, and who were going to invite?"

"You."

I looked at her, puzzled.  "Me?"

"Yes."

"Just me?"

"Yes."  

A smile slowly stole across my face.  "A private dinner for 
two, Agent Scully?"

"You bet."

"Sounds wonderful."

"Maybe we can have the Gunman over for a little while 
during the day.  But I want dinner to be just the two of 
us."

"You're on."  I rolled out of bed and grabbed my sweats.  
"Scully, I need to go home for a little while."  I pulled 
on my turtleneck which was two days dirty now and my socks 
and sneakers.  I turned around and she was pouting.  Scully 
was actually pouting and it was cutest thing I'd ever seen.

"Why?"

I shook my head in disbelief.  "Don't pout.  I need to get 
some clean clothes and underwear and some stuff to 
replenish my overnight bag here.  And I have something at 
home I want to pick up."

"What's that?"

"None of your beeswax."

"It's a secret?"

"For now.  Do you like surprises?"

"Yes.  Sometimes.  With you that's a loaded question!"

I laughed.  "Good.  I'll be back before you know it.  You 
want me to pick up some bagels, cream cheese and good 
coffee?"

"Yeah."

"O.K."  I leaned over the bed and kissed her softly.  Her 
hands captured the back of my neck and pulled me down on 
top of her.  I grunted as she spread her legs and let me 
settle between them, the covers between us.  "I'll never 
get out of here if you keep this up."

"Maybe you don't need any clothes."

"Grrrr."  I growled at her and kissed her neck.

She giggled.  "One more kiss, then I promise I'll let you 
up."

I lowered my head and kissed her slowly, lapping my tongue 
slowly over hers and sucking on each of her lips gently.  
Her eyes closed and she hummed in the back of her throat.  
I felt my groin stir.

"Scully, I have to get up before I lose my motivation."

She nodded.  I gave her a quick peck on the lips and hopped 
up.  I grabbed my coat in the foyer off the coat rack, 
fished around in the pocket for my keys and went out the 
door, setting it to lock behind me.

XXXXXXXXX

I missed him already.  He hadn't been gone an hour. I've 
showered, changed and cleaned the toilet bowl and made the 
bed.  Now I don't know what to do with myself.  I was in a 
frenzy of anticipation.  I didn't want to jump him the 
minute he comes in the door, but Christ!  It's like, now 
that I'd touched him, I wanted the whole enchilada.  

I laid down on the couch and closed my eyes, remembering 
the shower we took together last night.  I've never enjoyed 
giving head like that.  It was actually turning ME on!  I 
was wet before he ever laid a hand on me.  God and he was 
big.  I'd always wondered what was in those pants.  I 
suspected, I couldn't help but wonder.  But I was 
unprepared for seeing it and feeling how much it turned me 
on.  Knowing that just looking at me in that shower had 
made him hard.  I felt warmth seep into my bones and myself 
relax into the couch.

I ran my hands over my breasts and felt my nipples harden 
through my tee shirt.

The door bell rang.  Shit.  He couldn't be back that fast!

I jumped up, feeling somehow embarrassed even though no one 
could see me.  I looked out the peep hole and saw a kid in 
a uniform.  I unlatched the lock and opened the door a 
crack, leaving the chain on.  "Yes, can I help you?"

"You Dana Scully?"

"Yes."

"Flower delivery for you."  He bent down and picked up a 
long white box. I eagerly opened the door and took it from 
him.  He held out a clipboard and I signed.  He mumbled, 
"Thanks."  And walked off down the hall.

I scooped up the box and trotted into the kitchen.  I tore 
the ribbon and the lid off the box.  A dozen blood red 
roses with the thorns cut off the stems lay in a nest of 
green tissue paper.  I grabbed a vase, filling it with 
water and putting a tee spoon of sugar in it to make them 
last longer.  I arranged them carefully, smiling like an 
idiot.  Finally, I picked up the card that lay in the 
bottom of the box.

"D-For the love of my life. M-"  I felt the tears sting the 
back of my eyes.  Oh boy.  Mulder the romantic was making 
an appearance.  What else had he said?  Candlelight dinners 
and slow dancing had been on that list.

I stuck my nose in the roses and inhaled deeply.  An hour 
later the door bell rang.  I let him in.  His arms were 
full with two grocery bags, and a duffel bag slung over his 
shoulder.  I took one bag from him and he dropped the 
duffel bag inside the door.

I followed him into the kitchen, openly curious.  He pulled 
a smaller bag from inside the large one and handed it to 
me.  It was a CD of mixed love songs.  I smiled and ran 
over to the stereo and put it in, hitting random play and 
hustled back into the kitchen.

My jaw dropped as I saw him unpacking the grocery bag.  He 
had a roast, some potatoes, a bag of baby carrots, an 
onion, two bottles of wine, two red candlesticks and two 
brass candle holders.  He proceeded to put stuff in my 
refrigerator and then turned to find me staring at his ass 
again as he'd been bending into my fridge.  

He smirked at me.  "What?"

"What's all this?"

"Sunday dinner.  For later."

"You cook?"

"Yes, I cook."

"Never know it from the stuff growing inside your fridge.  
I don't know why they call it the crisper drawer.  In your 
case, they should call it the rotter!"

He chuckled.  "I can cook.  I just don't normally choose 
to.  It's no fun to cook for just yourself.  But I want to 
cook for you."

"A man who cooks.  This is looking better and better all 
the time!"  He grinned again.  

"The Cabernet Sauvignon is for dinner, but the white 
Zinfandel we can have now if you want."

"It's only 10:00 AM."

"Oh yeah.  A little early, huh?"  He reached into the 
bottom of the second bag and held out a bag with bagels and 
cream cheese.  I was starved.  I hadn't eaten, waiting for 
him.

"Any coffee, or should I make some?"

"Nope.  You sit and eat.  I'll make the coffee.  The last 
item from his bag of tricks was a bag of emerald cream 
Arabica beans.  He waggled his eyebrows and went to my 
cupboard, unerringly finding my bean grinder and coffee 
accessories.  

XXXXXXXXXX

LATER THAT NIGHT
8:00 PM

We'd eaten bagels and then went out to the mall Christmas 
shopping.  We'd split up to buy something for each other 
and met back up at the food court for a late lunch at 1:30 
PM.  We went back to my place.  I'd put his CD on again and 
we'd danced in my living room.  

He cooked his roast with all the fixings and we ate 
companionably, talking about Christmas and how good it 
would be to see the kids and how excited I was that he 
would be a part of it this year.  I invited him every year 
and every year he turned me down.  This year, he seemed 
eager to go.  Of course, brother Bill was not going to be 
there.

We finished dinner and he packed up the leftovers while I 
did the dishes.  He came up behind me and wrapped his arms 
around me.  My hands went slack in the soapy water.  "We 
need to talk about work," he mumbled.

I sighed deeply.  "Yeah.  Let me finish here, I'm almost 
done."

"O.K. Can I help?"

"No, I just have a couple of glasses to go.  Get some wine 
and go relax on the couch.  I'll be right out."  I turned 
as he grabbed the wine and two glasses and then walked 
away.  I could not get enough of the sight of that ass in 
jeans.  These jeans were black and he was wearing a cotton 
green polo shirt that made his eyes blaze a deep green.  I 
hadn't been able to stop looking at them through the flare 
of the candles on the table during dinner.  He looked good 
enough to eat.

I joined him a few minutes later.  He handed me a glass of 
white wine and I leaned back into the crook of his arm 
which he draped over my shoulder.  We sat in silence for a 
while.  I peeked up at him and he had a lazy smile on his 
face.  "What are you thinking about?"

"You ... and me."  I smiled.  "I feel so ... relaxed and 
contented.  I mean, I knew that being close to you was what 
was missing in my life, but I didn't even realize how much 
it would mean."

"How much does it mean?"

"It makes all the difference in the world.  In a scant 48 
hours, you've changed my entire outlook on my future."

"How so?"

"I'm looking forward to it."

"Your future?"

"My future with you."  I rolled over into him and wrapped 
my arms around his waist and squeezed.  His hands rubbed up 
and down my back, warming me and making me shiver a little.  
"Are you cold, Scully?"

"A little, but you're warm."

"Yes, and getting warmer by this minute."  I chuckled and 
straddled his legs.  He looked up at me, smiling.  "I love 
you, Scully.  I never thought I'd be brave enough to say 
that. I never thought I'd get the chance.  But however 
flaky I get about this, don't ever forget that I love you."

I kissed him tenderly.  "I love you too, Mulder."

"What about work?"

"What about it?"

"Do we let people know we are a couple or do we keep it a 
secret?"

"Well, they already call me Mrs. Spooky, so I don't think 
it would be a gigantic surprise."

"True, but I think we should be careful.  They can 
speculate all they want, but they don't KNOW FOR SURE, so 
they can't split us up because of it.  No evidence."

"You're right, Mulder.  We should be sure to keep our hands 
to ourselves at work.  We don't need to advertise it."  

"Good, then that's settled.  What about on the road?"

"What are you asking, Mulder?  One room or two?"

"It would cut down on expenses!"

"And send up the red flag of confirmation you say you don't 
want to raise."

"Yeah.  O.K., two rooms, but can we sleep in one?"

"Let's play it by ear.  I need to think about that.  It 
would probably be prudent to sleep apart on the road."

"But it will be torture.  I've slept with you one night and 
the thought of returning to my own empty bed ... I already 
can't stand the thought of it."

I smiled at him.  "There will be nights when we need to be 
apart."

"I know, but if we NEED to be, that's one thing.  When we 
don't HAVE to be, I want to be with you, Dana.  I'm still 
not sure this isn't all some delusional hallucination I'm 
having.  It's going to take me a while to believe that this 
isn't going to go up in smoke."

"I'm not going anywhere."

I pulled her to me and kissed her, chastely at first.  She 
began to kiss me back and I felt the familiar tingle in my 
groin, responding instantly to her touch.  Her hands were 
running up and down my sides.  "I have this fantasy," she 
mumbled into my ear.

"Dana Scully has fantasies?"

"Indeed."

"What's your fantasy, little girl?"

"It involves laying in bed and looking down ..."

"And?"

"And seeing your head between my legs."

Oh shit!  "Dana, oh my god."  All blood has now left my 
head and taken up residence between my legs.

"Mmm. Is that something you are willing to do?"  She began 
twirling her tongue all over my neck and nipping me 
lightly.

I nearly choked.  I'd only been dreaming about it for five 
years.  I stood up keeping her in my arms and her legs went 
around my waist.  I walked carefully into the bedroom.  I 
placed her gently on the bed and stripped her slowly, 
kissing her as I exposed skin, enjoying the soft silkiness 
of her skin.  "Your skin is so soft, Scully.  I can't get 
over how soft it is."

She hummed and watched me through hooded eyes as I stood up 
and stripped in front of her.

XXXXXXXXXX

If I'd ever seen a sexier man, I couldn't remember it.  The 
room was dark, but a bright moon is casting a slice of 
light in through the window and giving just the right 
amount of illumination.  I couldn't see everything, but it 
was dim and soothing.  I was crazy with anticipation.  I 
knew he was going to make my fantasy come true.  He was 
going to put that oral fixation to use on something besides 
sunflower seeds and I twitched with anticipation.  He 
pulled me to the edge of the bed, my legs dangling over the 
edge and leaned over me.  He kissed me languidly, deeply.  
I melted into his kisses.

He ran his tongue over my neck and collar bone and down 
into the valley of my breasts.  Oh God, yes.  For the first 
time, he sucked my turgid nipple into his mouth and sucked, 
hard!  I didn't recognize the choking sound in the back of 
my throat, but it apparently turned him on, because I felt 
him shudder and move to the other breast, giving it equal 
attention.  He made his way down my ribs and I jerked when 
his tongue swirled in my navel, tickling me.  His fingers 
raked through my stiff curls below my navel. 

He knelt on the floor, spreading my legs gently as he 
kissed his way up my thighs.  His razor stubble tickled me 
gently.  He smiled and then lapped me from bottom to top 
with the flat of his tongue.  I bucked my hips in response 
to the sudden assault.  One hand came up to hold my hips 
down and he returned, swirling his tongue around each lip 
and then sucking them into his mouth.  I forced my eyes 
open over the arousal springing from between my legs and 
propped myself up on my elbows.  

There it was.  The vision from so many of my fantasies.  
His brown hair spiked up, eyes closed, licking and sucking 
between my legs like he was at a feast.  A guttural groan 
escaped me and his eyes opened and fixed on my face.  He 
paused, then backed up slightly.  I whimpered.  Almost in 
slow motion, he stuck his tongue out and lowered it, 
lapping between my moist folds and swallowing.  He eyes 
were gleaming with mischief and it made my pulse soar.  He 
lapped me again but this time moved up and swirled that 
talented tongue around my clit, making me buck up into his 
face again.

Two fingers slid inside and curled up behind my pubic bone, 
gently circling until he found THE SPOT!  Oh Lord, did he 
ever find the spot!  I threw my head back and licked my 
lips as I felt my womb melt and an odd cringing in my 
vaginal walls start up with each swipe of his fingers.  His 
head lowered and began lapping my center of pleasure in 
time with his finger movement.  

I felt the wash of intense warmth flood my body just before 
the spasm started.  Once again, my walls gripped his 
fingers.  The base of my skull tingled and my legs quivered 
around the sides of his head.  He waited for me to recover.  
I panted and finally lifted my head again to look down.  
His chin was perched on my pubic bone.  He had a wide eyed 
innocent look that screamed mischief.  He was proud of 
himself.  I pressed my lips together tightly in an effort 
not to laugh at the look on his face.  I cleared my throat.  
"Proud of yourself, are you?"

He smiled a Cheshire cat grin, all teeth.  I chuckled.  He 
stood up and looked me over.  "Scoot up."

I gathered my energy and slid up to position myself in the 
center of the bed.  His hands ran up my legs and then he 
lowered himself between my thighs and began kissing me.  He 
whispered, "Christ, I feel like I've got a fever.  Jesus 
Scully, you're so beautiful when you come."

I shivered.  He lowered his mouth and attacked my neck 
again, sucking on my pulse point.  I whimpered.  I swear, 
no man had ever made me whimper.  I was overwhelmed by the 
feelings he was releasing in me.  For the moment anyway, he 
seemed to have lost his reticence.  Perhaps my reaction to 
that awesome display of oral gymnastics had blasted his 
fears away.  I hoped so.

XXXXXXXXXX

She whimpered.  I sucked on her neck and Dana Scully 
whimpered, right into my ear.  My cock throbbed every time 
I heard that sound.  I wanted to hear it again.  I was so 
hard my cock ached.  Watching her react to me had been the 
most powerful aphrodisiac I'd ever experienced.

I slid my hands down and under her to cup her tiny little 
ass and press her up against me.  Her lips landed on my 
neck and began to pull at the tendon there.  I tilted my 
head to give her better access.  I couldn't help the groan 
she pulled up from my toes as she sucked and made little 
passionate noises in her throat. 

Those sounds were driving me crazy.  Her hands were busy 
rubbing up and down my back, brushing the top of my ass and 
skittering back up my spine.  She nipped at my earlobe and 
swirled her pointed little tongue around the shell of my 
ear and I was all done.  No more waiting.  I wanted inside, 
and I wanted it NOW.

I crushed her mouth under mine and bucked my hips sliding 
into her in one swift stroke right to the hilt.  I gritted 
my teeth and shouted, "Ahhhhh, God, Scully."  

Holymotherofgodisshefuckingtight.  I blew air out of my 
pursed lips and curled my toes praying for control.  Her 
inner walls were wet and incredibly snug, pulsing around my 
engorged shaft.  So hot in here.  So fucking tight.

When I felt the urgency subside, I began to move slowly 
inside her, in and out, long, deep strokes, savoring the 
little gripping feeling that skittered over my cock with 
each push inside.  She went wild, grunting, moaning and 
whimpering as I sped up.  She was almost sobbing in her 
need and I gritted my teeth, praying for endurance.  I was 
determined to be relentless.  I was going to make her come 
again if it killed me.  I kissed her again and pulled one 
hand into action to tweak her nipple, peaked to perfection 
under my fingers.  She panted, "Mulder, so good, ooohoohoo, 
squeeze it, yeah, Oh, you're filling me so full, so full."

I let my weight sink into her, my knees sliding down on the 
bed and let myself slide my chest over hers with every 
thrust inside.  I'm didn't think I would last despite my 
best efforts.  Feeling her hard nipples brush against my 
pecs, I almost lost it.  She began sobbing again, gulping, 
and taking large, ragged breaths.  "Oh God, Mulder, don't 
stop, please don't stop, oh, never felt this, oh God, keep 
going, little more.  Oh God!"

I couldn't speed up in this position but I began stroking 
into her as hard as I could and pressing my pubic bone 
against hers at the bottom of every stroke.  She broke, 
finally.  And she screamed.  "Oooooohhhhhh, 
Ggggggoooooodddddd, Mmuulldderr!  Yyyyyyeeeeeeaaaaaahhhhhh!  
Sweet Jesus, Oh fuck, yeah!"

Her screams and the incredible feeling of her walls 
gripping me tight sent me soaring.  I groaned from the 
depth of my soul as I was rocked with the most powerful 
orgasm of my entire life.  I screamed something 
unintelligible and then panted her name as the my body 
twitched and the dying little spurts of come emptied from 
my cock, now a little sore from such an intense explosion.  
I collapsed on top of her and we listened to each other 
pant and felt our heart beats slowly returning to normal.

Into the quiet she murmured, "Yeah, that was definitely 
worth the wait."  I couldn't help the chuckle that bounced 
my torso against hers.  

She giggled and pressed her heels into my ass, keeping my 
now flaccid but still pulsing cock inside her.  I lifted my 
weight onto my elbows realizing I was probably crushing her 
but unwilling to move away just yet.  

I bent down and kissed her again until we were both 
breathless.  "Yes, it was definitely worth it."  



PART 3 ( R )

CHRISTMAS EVE
MARGARET SCULLY'S HOUSE
5:00 PM

Dinner was an enthusiastic affair.  My mother had gone all 
out.  There was ham and turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, 
her famous creamed onions, broccoli, turnip and mashed 
potatoes.  We all ate ourselves sick.  My sisters-in-law 
both seemed to like Mulder.  Mom sat him at the head of the 
table since he was the only male there and insisted that he 
cut the turkey and ham.  He'd been uncomfortable with that 
role, I could tell, but he went along like a good sport, 
loathe to disappoint my mother in the face of her 
overwhelming approval of our new relationship.

The week at work had been hectic.  We had been given 
several cases to investigate.  Two could wait but one 
needed attention.  I'd done autopsies on three victims and 
sent tons of lab work to Quantico and the forensic labs.  
We had labs and forensics doing all the background work up 
for us.  We would have to leave after Christmas for 
Michigan.  But Skinner had told us that under no 
circumstances were we to ruin our holiday.  He didn't ask, 
but I knew he sensed the change between us.  He was 
probably one of the few in the Bureau who didn't think we 
were already involved.  But just the fact that he said WE 
shouldn't ruin OUR holiday, was his subtle way of telling 
us he was onto something.

My mother couldn't wipe the evil grin off her face every 
time she saw me and Mulder exchanging a lingering look or a 
smile.  She was really beginning to get on my nerves, but I 
didn't want to make an issue of it and ruin the mood.  My 
nephews, Matthew and Marcus who were five and three had a 
food fight before we were finished.  Mulder was no help as 
he laughed through the whole thing making it impossible for 
Tara to scold them.  Little Olivia, Charlie's little girl 
was only a year old and was the picture of decorum in her 
high chair watching the entire proceedings with fascination 
while eating with her carrots and mashed potatoes with her 
hands as if it were the most natural thing in the world.  

I had a twinge of envy as I watched Tara and Rena with the 
children, but firmly squashed it down.  I decided nothing 
was going to ruin this holiday and least of all my 
melancholy over things I couldn't change anyway.

Mulder had made love to me every night since Sunday night, 
sometimes fast and wild, sometimes slow and reverent.  I 
couldn't remember ever being this sexually gratified in my 
entire life.  I was 37, on the tail end of my sexual peak 
and I was feeling it bad.  But Mulder, despite having 
turned forty, seemed more than willing to keep up with me.  
I was slightly amazed at his appetite, despite knowing 
about the infamous porn collection.

He'd briefly mentioned that Frohicke's birthday was coming 
up and maybe he should give the tapes to him.  I'd laughed 
and said maybe he should give some to each of the guys for 
Christmas.  He'd run home and returned with three boxes of 
them and a load of wrapping paper.  We'd spent one 
afternoon doing nothing but wrapping each film 
individually.  

Much to my surprise, he talked me into watching a couple of 
them and we ended up fucking on the couch and the living 
room floor, I got so excited.  Needless to say, there are 
about 10 tapes hidden away in a draw under my entertainment 
center.  He just grinned when he saw me spirit them away, 
shaking his head in disbelief.  Each of the guys was still 
getting about ten tapes.

Dinner over, I was helping my mother clean up in the 
kitchen and Mulder was playing with the boys in the living 
room.  Tara came in to help.  She looked at me smiling.  
"Mulder is so good with the boys, I'm surprised."

I smiled.  "Doesn't surprise me."

She nodded.  "I guess there's a lot none of us know about 
him."

"That's an understatement," I quipped. 

"I owe you an apology, Dana."

"For what?"

"I've held a certain opinion of your partner without ever 
really having any of my own information to go on."

"Bill."  I said his name with resignation.  She nodded.

"I know how opinionated Bill can be and I know not to 
blindly believe his opinions of people, but he's usually 
right."

I nodded.  "Not this time, Tara."

"I know, I realized that the sole reason he doesn't like 
Mulder is because ..."

I cut her off. "Because he thinks he puts me in danger."

"Partly, but the biggest reason he hates him is because you 
care for him and listen to him instead of to Bill."

I stared at her in shock.  "What do you mean?"

"Bill has this archaic idea that his little sister is not 
supposed to fall in love and that she will forever seek his 
advice and approval.  No matter who you chose for friends, 
they wouldn't be good enough for you in his eyes."

"That's ridiculous.  I'm a grown woman.  I have been for a 
long time."

"I know that, but you'll always be his LITTLE sister."

"Yeah, well, he better get over it, because from now on, I 
won't be tolerating anymore of his caveman bullshit."  I 
paused, realizing I was getting angry and none of this was 
Tara's fault.

"I'm sorry Tara, but this is a long standing problem of 
perception between Bill and I and it's long since past time 
that we work it out."

She nodded. "I won't get in the middle."

"I know you won't.  But Tara, it's more serious than that."  
She looked at me with a question on her face.  "Mulder 
isn't just my friend."

Her eyes got wider as the implication dawned on her.  "Oh, 
my.  What exactly is he?"

"He's everything to me."

"Define everything."

"He's my work partner, he's my best friend, he's my rock."  
I paused.  "And he's my lover.  I'm in love with him, Tara.  
And he loves me."

She took a deep breath.  "Bill will take that mighty hard."

"Yeah, well, tough shit."  She knew I meant it without 
rancor.

"He'll get over it."

"I don't know if he will or won't, but it won't change 
things.  If he wants to remain a part of my life, he will 
accept it.  He doesn't have to like it, but I won't have 
him attacking Mulder verbally every time they are in the 
same room.  Mulder's done nothing to deserve it."

My mother interrupted at this point.  "Girls, when the 
opportunity is right, I will talk to Bill, Jr.  He'll take 
it better from me than from either of you who are too 
emotionally involved here.  I'll break it to him gently and 
then I'll tell him to behave himself.  But now is not the 
time.  He isn't here."

"You're right, Mom, I'm sorry."

"It's all right."  Tara went back in the living room as Mom 
and I finished up the dishes.  Mom stood drying her hands 
on a dish towel and looking at me.

"What?"

She smiled.  "So, he's your lover now, is he?  Last week 
you'd just sort of, not really, blah, blah, blah."

I blushed.  "Mom, you have a real way with words."

She chuckled.  "So how was it?"

"Why should I tell you?"

"No reason, really.  I guess I'm just nosey.  I would think 
after the two of you held back for about five years, it 
would be pretty explosive."

"How did you know ... ?"

She quirked her eyebrow up at me, reminding me where I got 
that from.  "Dana, I've known he was in love with you since 
I saw him when you were gone.  He was beside himself with 
grief.  I'd never seen a man so devastated and still 
living."

I felt my throat get thick.  My voice was a croak.  "He 
won't talk much about that time."

"I don't imagine he will, maybe I'll tell you what I know 
sometime.  But it's Christmas and again, it's not the 
time."

"O.K., let's join the others."

"One more thing?"

"Yeah, mom?"

"You haven't fooled me either.  I've known you were in love 
with him too, for years."

"I didn't know."

"I did."  I nodded at her, deciding it was better not to 
ask how she knew.  We joined the others.

Rena played on the spinet and we all sang Christmas carols, 
my incredibly off-key.  Mulder kept laughing at me, but I 
couldn't muster up the indignation to be angry about it.  I 
knew I sucked at singing.  Ahab used to say I couldn't 
carry a tune in a bushel basket.

After coffee and warm apple pie, we decided it was time to 
go.  I kissed the boys and Olivia good bye and hugged Tara, 
Rena and Mom.  Mulder followed behind me dutifully hugging 
each of the women.

I chuckled as I heard Rena through the closing door behind 
us say, "Christ, does it get any better looking than that?"

Mulder snapped his head around to me and actually blushed.  
I laughed and raced him to the car.

XXXXXXXXXX

I had gotten the boys each wool sweaters and wool socks.  
But I lost out to Mulder's porn collection.  They were an 
overwhelming hit.  If you could have heard the hooting and 
hollering.  I went in the kitchen so I didn't have to be 
the brunt of any rude comments.

Mulder came looking for me.  "Hey, you."

"Hey."

"You O.K.?  Did the boys upset you?"

"No, I just figured you needed a few male bonding minutes 
out there."

He smiled and wrapped me into a bear hug.  The guys didn't 
know we were an item yet.  We hadn't spilled the beans.  
They had eaten enough for an army.  My six pound ham and 
five pounds of potatoes were gone.  I shuddered to think 
what they spent on groceries.

'Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire' was playing softly on 
my stereo in the living room and Mulder began swaying 
gently with me in his arms.  I melted into his chest and 
let my head rest on his chest.  He tucked my head under his 
chin.  I looked up at him.  He gazed down at me, a soft 
contented look on his face.  His hands came up to cup my 
face.  He kept swaying.  

"Scully, you've made me the happiest man on earth."

"I've never been happier either, Mulder."

"God, you'll never know how much I love you, Scully."  I 
saw a shadow over his shoulder.

I tried to squeak out, "Mul..."  But his lips descended on 
mine and he slowly kissed me, pushing his hot, wet tongue 
into my mouth.  Despite the audience I knew was there, I 
couldn't focus when his mouth was on mine.  I whimpered a 
little, and pulled back, trying to get his attention.  He 
just backed me a step against the counter and deepened the 
kiss, pressing the beginning of his erection into my belly.  

I finally got up enough strength to swat the back of his 
shoulder with my hand.  He lifted away just as the shadow 
cleared its throat loudly.  Mulder stepped away from me 
quickly and spun around.  All three boys stood there with 
their mouths hanging open.  Frohike looked like he'd been 
shot.  My hand came up to cover my mouth.  "Oh God," I 
murmured.

Mulder stuck his tongue in his cheek.  He did that when he 
was trying hard to think of something to say.  Finally, he 
said, "Ooppss."

Langley started laughing.  Byers smiled.  Frohike was still 
frozen.  I looked down, feeling the red flush rising up my 
neck.  Mulder cleared his throat.  "Well, now you know.  
This isn't the way I planned on telling you guys."

Frohike finally spoke.  "I should hope not."

Mulder looked at him and actually looked sincere when he 
said, "Frohike, I'm sorry.  I really am."

He spun on his heel and went back into the living room.  
Byers shook his head.  "I'll go talk to him."

Mulder shook his head in the negative.  "No, I will."  And 
he left me in the kitchen with Langley and Byers.

Langley looked at me and smiled.  "Way to go, Scully, I 
wondered if you'd ever break him down."

My jaw dropped and Byers said, "Yeah, about time."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Byers peered at me like I was an interesting specimen.  
Langley tilted his head as if to say, 'you don't know?'

Finally Byers said, "Dana, he's been in love with you for 
years, but he was so afraid of losing you.  We told him he 
should go for it, but he just kept telling us we didn't 
understand how complicated it was."

Langley nodded in agreement.  "I remember asking him, 
'what's so complicated?'  She loves you, you love her, and 
you should be together.  But he wouldn't listen to me."

I smiled at them.  "Seems everybody knew he was in love 
with me but me."

Byers asked, "Who else knew?"

"My mother, apparently."

"Ahh, well, mothers are like that."  He smiled.  "Well, I'm 
happy for you and don't worry, Frohike will get over it."

"Is he really that upset?"

Langley looked at the ceiling.  "Dana, you know he loves 
you don't you?"

"Well, yeah, but I thought it was like, 'love you as a 
friend'."

Langley shook his head in the negative.  "No.  He knew 
there was never any chance for him, but as long as you were 
single, he didn't have to face that and move on.  Now he 
does.  He also knows that Mulder is in love with you.  
They've commiserated about how hopeless it was that you 
would ever love either one of them."

"They have?  Oh, that's just great!"

Byers spoke up.  "No, nothing bad.  Mulder never told any 
of your deep, dark secrets.  Some of those conversations 
ended with Frohike assuring him that you did love him, he'd 
just have to make you aware that he loved you.  But he was 
too chicken."

XXXXXXXXXX

Frohike stood staring out the window looking down at the 
street lamp on the sidewalk.  It was snowing lightly and I 
thought what a beautiful picture it made.  I shook my head 
and walked up behind him, not too close. 

I wasn't kidding.  I really did feel bad.  I knew he loved 
her too.  I knew he would be hurt by this, but maybe I 
didn't even realize how bad.  He covered up so much with 
wit and sarcasm.  But that was his defense mechanism and I 
knew that.

"Frohike, talk to me."

He spun around.  "Not now, Mulder."

"Yes, now.  I'm sorry you had to find out that way.  I was 
going to tell you guys, but when she wasn't around.  And I 
was going to tell you privately, because I knew you would 
be upset.  And for all the times I've cried on your 
shoulder, I felt I owed you that courtesy."

"Courtesy?"

"Don't split hairs with me, Frohike.  I know you're upset.  
I know you're angry.  But you also know I love her.  You do 
know that, right?"

He seemed to deflate a little.  "Yeah, I know that."

"And you know that I would never, ever hurt her 
intentionally, right?"

"Yes."  I paused.  Unsure whether to say this next thing.  
I swallowed rather noisily and he looked at me.  "Say it."

I took a deep breath.  "She loves me, Frohike."  I blinked 
back the tears.  "You were right.  I can't hardly believe 
it myself, but she really loves me."

He looked at me and I stopped trying to stop the tears.  I 
knew he wouldn't think less of me because of them and he 
knew I wasn't faking them.  "I knew that too, but it still 
hurt.  Not so much knowing that you two were finally 
together.  I always knew that you were meant for each other 
if you'd both just yank your heads out of your asses."  I 
smiled.  

He was whispering now.  "I guess it hurt to see you kissing 
her, because ... I could see how much she loves you too.  
Knowing it and seeing it are two different things, you 
know?"

"Yes.  And again, I really am sorry you saw that.  It was 
stupid of me to kiss her with you guys here, but ..."

He smiled a humorless smile.  "You couldn't help yourself?"

I smiled then, gently.  "You have no idea."

"Yeah, I think I do.  If a woman like Scully ever offered 
herself to me, I don't think I would be able to resist 
kissing her whenever I got the opportunity either.  I just 
couldn't stand there and watch it, yet, I couldn't walk 
away.  I didn't mean to ogle you two."

"That's O.K., I understand.  I think she was a little 
embarrassed."

"I'll apologize later."

"No need."

"I want to be happy for you, Mulder.  I know that I SHOULD 
be happy for you."

"Don't."

"No, I need to say this just so you know."  He paused.  
"And I WILL be happy for you soon.  But I need to process 
this and accept it.  Give me a little while, O.K.?  And try 
not to rub it in my face in the meantime."

"Deal.  Are we O.K., Frohike?  This isn't going to ruin our 
friendship, is it?"

"No, man.  We'll always be friends.  No chick is ever going 
to come between us."

"Scully would have a fit if she heard you call her a 
chick."

He laughed.  "Scully would have a fit if she heard a lot of 
things I've said."

We laughed together then.  "I love you too, you know?"

He chuckled at that and looked up at me.  "Don't get all 
mushy on me, now, Mulder, or I may have to kick your ass."

Frohike the wise cracker was back. We were going to be O.K.  
I held out my hand and he shook it.  "Ready to rejoin the 
others?"

"Yeah.  Take care of her, Mulder.  I know you will.  But so 
help me god, if you ever break her heart, I'll kill you 
myself."

I nodded solemnly, trying not to laugh.  At the same time, 
I knew he meant it.

XXXXXXXXXX

After the boys left, we decided to exchange gifts.  Mulder 
gave me a sky blue teddy with matching silk panties from 
Victoria's Secret.  Nestled inside the box was a tiny 
wrapped square.  I opened it and found a sapphire ring 
inside.  I gasped.  "Mulder, you shouldn't have done this?"

"Why not?  You're eyes always remind me of sapphires, 
especially when you're angry.  And I wanted to get you 
something nice.  I finally have someone to spend money on, 
and you can't take it with you when you go.  I'm glad you 
like it."

"I love it!'  I kissed him until he pried me off him, 
indicating that he wanted to open his package.  I put the 
ring on and it fit perfectly.  The four carat stone was cut 
round and beveled and sparkled in the light.  It was set in 
white gold.  I wore it on my ring finger of my right hand.

He shook the box I got him and I laughed.  "It's heavy."

He tore the paper open and gasped.  "Kalil Jibran!  Oh my 
god, Scully, I've been wanting to get this for so long, but 
I was too cheap!"

I laughed.  "Oh, you'll buy a sapphire ring but you won't 
buy a book you want?"  He laughed.

"Sounds pretty silly, doesn't it."  He paused.  "Thank you 
so much."

I knew he'd wanted it.  He'd left me a passage from a 
Lithuanian philosopher that was all about love and finding 
the girl of your dreams.  I'd cried when I read it and he'd 
told me who it was by and that he'd been wanting to pick up 
the "Second Treasury" of his works, but never got around to 
it. 

We kissed again and then sat looking at each other.  I 
stood up abruptly and stripped right there in the living 
room.  I put on the teddy and panties and strutted around 
the living room to Mulder's laughter and open admiration.  
He finally grabbed me and swung me up into a fireman's 
carry and carted me off the bedroom. 

We didn't come out till the next morning.

EPILOGUE (NC-17)
MULDER'S APARTMENT
TWO WEEKS LATER

I walked out of the bathroom and stopped to admire the 
view.  Mulder, bare ass naked, sprawled out on his stomach 
in the middle of his bed.  I sneaked up quietly and then 
leaped onto the bed, landing straddling his thighs.  He 
shouted in surprise and craned his neck around to look at 
me.

"Are you trying to give me a heart attack, woman?"

I laughed and bent over to suck on the back of his neck.  
He moaned and his head flopped back down onto the bed.  I 
lapped my way down his spine and fondled his gorgeous ass.  
He lifted his hips as I tried to slide my hand between his 
legs and groaned deep as I grasped his shaft in my hand.   
He came up on all fours.  I let my tongue slide between his 
cheeks and swirled it around his anus.  He pulled away from 
me slightly but then settled back.  I could hear him 
panting.

I wandered further and sucked on the skin behind his balls.  
He shuddered.  I loved the immediacy of his passion.  I 
loved the way he didn't hold back his reactions to my 
touch.  It was intoxicating.  He was such a sensual 
creature.  Knowing that I could unleash this purely 
uninhibited thing in him was a powerful feeling.  He'd told 
me he'd never reacted like this to any other woman, with a 
total absence of fear.  I didn't know whether I believed 
that or not, but I was willing to take his word for it.

I spread his legs and turned over on my back, scooting my 
head between his legs.  I took his ass cheeks in my hand 
and gave a gentle tug.  He whimpered and lowered his cock 
to my mouth.  He was fully engorged, the head red with 
blood, his veins bulging.  He was panting as he watched me 
like a hawk.  I stuck out my tongue and swirled it over the 
head, lapping up his leaking fluid and teasing him.  He 
whimpered again.  That always killed me.

I tugged again and he spread his legs wide, lowering 
himself.  I engulfed him with my mouth, taking as much as I 
could into my mouth.  I felt him bump the back of my throat 
and I began sucking, bobbing up and down his shaft.  I 
loved it when he lost control.  His eyes never left mine.  
I saw his eyes roll back in his head and knew he was about 
to lose control.  I let go of him with an audible pop and 
he groaned.  I crawled out and flipped him over onto his 
back.  

He grabbed my hips as I grabbed him and guided him to my 
moist folds, coating the end of his shaft.  He moaned 
lightly, "You're sooo wet, Scully."

"Mmm. Yeah."  With that I sank down slowly until he was 
embedded fully.  He was so deep in this position.  I loved 
the feeling of him bumping my cervix.  He hissed air 
through his teeth.  I waited for him to settle, just 
enjoying the feeling of being so full.  

I began to ride him slowly, watching his face.  I loved to 
watch his face and see what I was doing to him.  I realized 
suddenly that I was a very, very lucky woman.  How many 
women could say that they had a man who loved them as 
completely as Mulder loved me.  No more fear.  No 
reservations, no secrets.  He loved me with everything he 
had.  He loved me with fierce intensity that stole my 
breath away sometimes.  And I loved him just as much.  It 
was rather overwhelming at times, but I wouldn't trade a 
second of it.

He raised his knees slightly and began to buck up under me 
faster.  I matched his pace and braced my hands on his 
shoulders.  His hands came up to fondle my breasts and I 
felt my body melt and tingle with warmth.  He gasped, "How 
did we get here, Scully?  Oh Lord, how can it be this 
good?"

He seemed truly baffled and overwhelmed.  My heart surged 
with love for this man laying beneath me and worshipping me 
with just a look.  I sped up and began to grind myself into 
him with each thrust.  He grunted.  I felt the spasms start 
and shouted his name, throwing my head back and feeling my 
ass cheeks clench violently as wave after wave washed 
through me, leaving me limp. 

He rolled me over quickly before I had a chance to recover, 
lifted my legs straight up in the air, holding me behind 
the knees.  He was squat kneeling between my legs as he 
pounded into me with a wild fury.  "Yes, Yes, Yes, Mulder,  
hit me hard, let go, come for me. Oh yeah, let me see it.  
Come for me."

"Sccuulleeeeee!  Ooowwwwaaaahhhhh.  Ohyeahohyeahohyeah.  Oh 
honey, yeah!"

Honey?  Did he just call me honey?  He collapsed between my 
legs, letting mine fall to the mattress.  His arms wrapped 
around my shoulders and his head nestled into the crook of 
my neck.  When he was sufficiently recovered, I asked him, 
"Am I mistaken, or did you call me 'Honey?'"

He lifted his head and looked at me, a smile tugging at the 
corner of his mouth.  "I don't know, did I?"

"Yeah, you did."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No, it was just weird."

"Oh, so, should I be careful not to do it again?"

"No, it's O.K., as long as we're alone."

He flopped his head back down, this time between my 
breasts.  "You never answered me, Scully."

"What was the question?"

I felt him smile against my chest and press a quick kiss to 
the side of my breast.  "How did we get here?  How did we 
find each other and get lucky enough to find the courage to 
finally let our feelings show?  Not that we don't deserve 
happiness after all we've been through, but it still seems 
a little unreal to me sometimes.  You complete me like I 
never thought possible.  I feel so ... whole ... when we 
make love."

"Hmm, me too.  I don't know ... HONEY ... must be kismet."

He chuckled.  "Kismet huh?"

"Yeah, you know, fate."

"Thought you didn't believe in such things."

"Neither do you."

"I do now."  I chuckled.

"I love you, Mulder."

"Love you, Scully."

"Here's to kismet."

"To kismet."  He kissed me and rolled to the side, taking 
me with him.  His penis slid out of me, leaving a sticky 
mess.  I scooted away from the wet spot and curled up under 
his chin.  He pulled me up against him tight and we fell 
asleep.

My last thought was, 'Kismet?  Where did I come up with 
that?'

THE END.