The Trick Is To Keep Breathing by Dasha K dashak@aol.com Please archive at Gossamer and anywhere else, please tell me where you put it so I can come visit. Summary: What happens when Mulder and Scully walk off into the sunset? Rating: NC-17. Yep, one of those. Classification: S, R, little bit of H, little bit of A Keywords: MSR Spoilers: Fight the Future Disclaimer: They belong to CC, 103 and Fox. If they belonged to me there wouldn't be any Noromo bees hanging around. The title is taken from a song by Garbage. Feedback: Accepted with love at dakluz@stkate.edu Author's Note: Okay, my writing muse and I just had a fight. I wanted to write some smut and she ordered me to write a sweet little Mrs. Scully piece. Finally, after hours of animated debate, my muse made a final offer. "You can write smut," she said, "But it has to be Moviefic." I groaned. The last thing I wanted to do was write Moviefic. I begged and pleaded with her, but to no avail. She wouldn't budge. So here I am, tossing my hat into the Moviefic ring. This story is for Rachel Anton, who in my humble opinion, is the Queen of Quality Smut. Xxxxxxxxxxxxx Hand in hand, Scully and I walk into the summer sunset. The birds are singing, the grass of the park is fragrant and old people smile at us approvingly. All is right with the world. True love rings triumphant, good has vanquished evil, the X-Files have reopened and I've just about paid off my Visa bill. Yeah, right. At least the X-Files have reopened, and my partner is by my side. That's good enough for now. We walk a few more steps and stop under the shade of a large cherry tree. As if by mutual accord, our hands part and we turn to face one another. That thing, that moment in the hallway of my building, hangs between us, a palpable third presence. Or, I think it does. I am not even sure if Scully remembers what happened. The three days she spent in the Auckland hospital, the nearly 24 hours we flew from Auckland to Honolulu to Los Angeles to Washington, she never mentioned that moment. Mostly, she slept. It was only a few seconds, really, but my memory has filed it in excruciatingly slow motion. The way our confrontation stilled into that desperate, crushing embrace. The smell of her perfume surrounding me, rich and heady. The warmth of her lips pressing on my forehead. Her hands on my neck, mine touching her face, our eyes locking and my heart beating out of control. My breath catching in my throat as the inevitability of the moment hit me. For a long moment I forgot to breathe. Oh, I thought, this is really going to happen, and then I moved my face in closer. And then fate stepped in to thwart us. Scully brushes a strand of her copper hair out of her eyes and gives me a close-lipped smile. "What do we do now, Mulder?" she asks. "Our office is still Cancerman's personal ashtray, so I suggest we go home and relax." She laughs and again, I find it difficult to breathe. "I meant right now. I'm starving. Do you want to get something to eat?" By now, she should know I can refuse her nothing. "You're the boss," I say, and we continue on into the sunset. XXX We find ourselves sitting at an outside table at Barbaresco, a small Italian place in Georgetown, just a few blocks from her apartment. I watch in amazement as Scully puts away a huge place of orichette con funghi porcini. "Don't stare," she says with her mouth full. "Sorry, but my God, woman, you can eat." "Hey, didn't get much in the way of food in Antarctica, and the last few days the jet lag has kind of upset my stomach. This is the first real meal I've had since Dallas." I can't admit to her that I enjoy watching her eat, the passion and gusto she puts into a plate of wild mushroom pasta. The way she throws herself into living. My own plate of pasta puttanesca lies mostly untouched. Scully spears a clump of my pasta and gleefully chomps it down. "Hey!" I smack her hand away. "If you won't eat it, I will." "I'll ask the waitress for a box and you can have it for breakfast tomorrow." We don't mention what we saw, what we went through down there. I don't think either of us has fully digested it yet, can understand the enormity of what we saw. Right now we are merely content to be alive, to be breathing and sitting in the warm night of the city. Do you remember, Scully? I silently ask her. So much for psychic connections. She just wipes her plate with the last bit of her bread. Looking up at me, she sighs with contentment. "That was so good," she says, "Better than sex." I stifle a laugh. "Then you haven't ever had really good sex, Scully." Her little ears turn pink, just at the tips. Do you remember? At that moment, a bee flies in her face and she swats it away, her face a mixture of annoyance and amusement on her face. Her lovely lips twist upwards into a wry grin. "Do you sense a motif here?" Shit. Scully remembers. I don't know if this news makes me glad or not. I put down my fork and look at her. "We haven't talked about that yet." Just keep breathing, I tell myself. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale. Biting her lower lip, she dips her head so that her hair nearly covers her face. "I know," she says in a quiet voice, "I don't know what to say." Fear courses through my body in an almost nauseating thrill. "What do you mean by that?" Scully lifts her head, her blue eyes wide. "I just have one question for you, Mulder and I want you to be completely honest with me." "Of course," I manage to get out. "When we were in the hallway and you were going to-" She stops. I supply the words. "Kiss you?" She nods slightly. "Yes. Mulder, what was that kiss?" "I'm not sure I'm following you." "Was it just your way of getting me to stay?" Her hands tear her paper napkin into fine shreds. Oh God, is that really what she thinks? "Scully, do you really believe that after five years of partnership I'd try to seduce you into staying with me?" "You tell me." I take her cool hand in mine. "I would never manipulate your feelings in that way. I would like to think you know me better than that." Scully shuts her eyes and then opens them again. "I do, Mulder." Lifting her hand to my mouth, I kiss each knuckle individually. "That day I told you that you make me a complete person," my voice catches in my throat, "And I meant it. You give me the strength to carry on this personal crusade of mine. You give me everything and I have nothing to offer you in return." She sighs. "That's not true. You give my life purpose. Do you know how it killed me when they decided to separate us? Do you?" Her voice rises. "Yes, I know." "I want to see this thing to the end now. I want the truth. I want Melissa's death to have meaning, I want you to find out what really happened with Samantha. I want the world to make sense again." Her voice is vehement. I squeeze her hand tighter. "I want those things, too." She pulls her hand away and sits up as straight as can be. "I want you." "You have me, you always have." Scully shakes her head. "No, you're not listening to me. I want you, all of you. I have your friendship, your partnership and now it's time for us to move to the next level." So logical, my Scully. "Tell me what that means to you," I respond. "I want your love, Mulder." Her voice is barely audible. "You should know by now that you have that, too." "Not platonic love. I want to be with you, to touch you, to kiss you. I want to make love to you." Despite the warm night, goose bumps form all over my body. "God, are you sure, Scully?" She gives a low laugh. "Did you see me push you away in the hallway?" I have to laugh too. "Well, there was that bee-" "What would have happened if the bee wasn't there?" Her expression is more than a question, it is a challenge. I run my fingertip along the curve of her cheekbone. "I would have taken you back inside and made long, slow love to you. If you would have let me, that is." To my embarrassment, I am getting hard, right here at the restaurant. She shakes her head. "I would have been with you every step of the way." I signal the waitress for the check. XXX We stand at the entrance to her building. Scully gives me a shy smile. "Do you want to come in?" I kiss her cheek. "We don't have to rush things, you know." "Rush things, Mulder? It's been five years." With that, we go inside. The door shut and bolted behind us, we dumbly stare at each other, not knowing where to start. Finally, Scully breaks the silence. "So, who makes the first move here?" "Why don't you threaten to quit the Bureau," I laugh. I sit down on the pretty striped sofa and pat the spot beside me. "Sit down, get comfortable." Comfortable? Jeez, I can hardly breathe. She unbuttons her jacket and carefully hangs it in the closet. Gingerly, she sits down next to me. She's clearly as nervous as I am. Her fingers rise to toy with the gold cross hanging around her neck. "I forgot to tell you, thank you for finding this." "You wouldn't be you without it." I say, and I bend down to kiss the hollow of her throat where the cross rests. I kiss the tip of her nose, her forehead, her eyelids with reverence. "What's a beautiful woman doing with a guy like me?" "I'm kissing him. Finally," she says and brushes those full lips of hers against mine. Thankfully, no bees show up. A little voice reminds me to keep breathing. We slowly savor the delicacy that is our first kiss. Then it becomes harder, hotter. Deep and wet, her mouth tasting of wine and mushrooms, her tongue reaching to touch my own. Her breasts press into my chest, my hands are tangled in her soft hair. Scully pulls away and laughs. "God, Mulder, if I knew you could kiss like that you could have had me in that motel in Oregon." "Really? Because when you stood there in your panties, I wanted to do precisely that." Taking my earlobe in her mouth, she gently sucks the flesh there. Suddenly, my pants feel far too confining for comfort. Somehow, I manage to get my tie unknotted and a couple of buttons undone. Scully's neck is the silkiest place I have ever touched. She growls a little as I kiss its sweetness. Standing up, she unzips her skirt and lets it fall to the floor. And holy, holy shit, she is wearing a pair of black lace panties and lace topped thigh high stockings. My mouth falls open. "If only I could get a picture of that look on your face, Mulder," she says, smiling. "It's more impressive than any alien ship." She stands over me and unbuttons my shirt with hasty fingers. Her own white blouse comes off and she is before me clad in her white lace bra holding her round, perfect little breasts. Scully pulls me up off the couch, undoes my pants and tugs them down. I look down to see which pair of boxers I have on today. Thankfully it's a normal pair of blue and white striped ones. We stare at each other, dumbfounded at what we have done. Scully's hand brushes against my erection, which tents my boxers. She whispers in my ear, "Is that for me?" "It's all yours." I whisper back and again our mouths meet in a fierce kiss. She pushes me back down on the couch and straddles me. My hands reach for her lovely bottom and I press her into my hardness, groaning at the feeling of her against me. My shaky fingers get her bra unhooked and I circle the curves of her breasts. They are magnificent, full, the rosy nipples hard and peaked. Scully closes her eyes and tilts her head back, her mouth open. I trace each nipple with my tongue and yes, she is as delicious as I had imagined. She rocks in my lap harder now, the friction making it almost painful for me, but I want this to last forever. It's going to be so good. We've waited for so long. But Scully is an impatient woman, I find out. She lifts up a little and struggles her panties off. "Mulder, " she whispers in my ear with desperation, "Touch me." And I do, I do. I touch the coarse, damp curls on her mound, her slick wetness, her swollen clitoris and she makes a sound I've never heard before, a low keening noise. The most erotic thing I've ever heard. And then she shows me just how impatient she really is. Scully manages to push my boxers down and my penis rests against the softness of her inner thigh. "Give it to me," she says. I gasp, "But I want to-" She runs her tongue down the length of my chest and looks up at me with curiously mischievous eyes. "No. Give it to me, Mulder." I lift her hips and settle her slowly down onto me. Oh Lord. Let there be no bees in the vicinity. Her hands lightly rest on my shoulders and she smiles beatifically. We stop and look at each other, laugh a little. Finally. Then she begins to move and the feeling is nothing short of extraordinary. I can't help but cry out at the sensation and she silences me with a kiss. There have been many empty nights, when she was just a thin motel wall away from me, when I fantasized about making love to Dana Scully. Now I realize the poverty of my imagination. It never came close to this, not by a country mile. I never could have imagined how deep and wet and warm she'd be. I didn't quite get right the sounds she'd make, she's making now, ripe, animalistic sounds. Never could picture the expression of love and satisfaction on her lovely face. She thrusts herself down on me hard, her arms tightly wrapped around my back, my own hands pushing her harder onto me. And then I feel her internal muscles gather into hard contractions and she arches her back and, I'm not making this shit up, lets out a full bore scream. As she screams, she lowers herself down onto my cock and the waves start in me, too and I hear my own cries of pleasure join Scully's. No no no no, I think, I want this to last forever, I want to be in Scully 24 hours a day. Fuck the FBI, fuck the Consortium, all I want to do is fuck this amazing woman. Oh God, it's good. I feel like I just ran the Boston Marathon. We are certainly sweaty enough. I feel like I just won the Powerball jackpot. We kiss a final time and then just smile stupidly at each other. Wow, we did it. Scully laughs and jumps up. "Oh, my poor couch!" "Do you have any more furniture we can wreck?" She licks her lips and gives me the most dangerous of smiles. "We have all night to figure that one out." And we do. But this isn't a fairy tale. There probably won't be a happy ending for Scully and me. Our lives are just too dangerous. But as the sun rises in the morning, she lies in my arms and tells me she loves me. And I say it right back to her. That is enough of a happy ending for me. END Thanks for reading. Feedback is good for your karma. Send it to dashak@aol.com Dasha's Fanfic-O-Rama: http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Studio/7367