Title: Stolen Moments
Author: SunReyes
sunreyes01@yahoo.com
Category: UST/DRR
Characters are property of 1013, don't sue me you
guys, I'm just an innocent bystander. I'm writing this
because I'm bored out of my mind; I love The X-Files,
Doggett, and Reyes. 

Rating: NC-17 

Sometimes I truly fall for the wrong guys.  It always
happens this way, well never so terribly before.  I
guess I shouldn't be surprised that I'm in love with
my partner.  Yes, I can finally admit it.  Well I
wouldn't quite call it love but I would definitely go
as far to say as I have it bad for John Doggett.  Wow,
it's so good to get that out in the open.  Of course I
could never tell him, believe me I've tried.  I've
contemplated the good and the bad and lately more than
ever I realize he doesn't return the gesture.  It's
sad really, he lost his son a few years back and now
he's losing her, Dana.  He cares for her, it's so
obvious and yet she doesn't allow herself to open up
to him, because she's in love with Mulder.  I guess
it's a nasty love triangle that I have gotten myself
into.  I should have seen this one coming.  I really
should have but I guess sometimes I let the best of
things get to me...the way he wiped the mustard from
that polish sausage off my face, *sigh* I really do
have it bad.  Now if only I could get him to show his
feelings towards me.  It's not so hard to believe that
he could have the slightest bit towards me, but I wont
grovel on it...if he feels nothing that's how things go
I suppose.

 

As I was getting ready for work, and daydreaming I
might add, the doorbell startled me, guess who it was
John.  There he was on the other side of the door
looking handsome as ever I might add, "well come in
John, what are you doing here?"

 

"I just thought I'd stop by and bring you into work
this morning, did you forget, we have a meeting at 8am
sharp in the assistant directors office"

 

Oh yes, A.D. Brad Follmer, he's a whole other story,
that I guess I can admit to, the sex was great, but he
was lacking worth, substance. LOL.  "Oh yeah, I
completely forgot, and well, my mind got the best of
me, I guess."  Sometimes I go on too much, oh well.  

 

"Your mind, huh?  Anything I should be worried about?"
 



He nudged at my shoulder, which sent off sparks of
electricity within me.  "Haha nothing of any
relevance, just stuff, you know how that is."

 

"Of course I do Mon" 



Man did he look good today, scrumptious I might add,
when does this guy not look sexy as hell though.  Oh
there you go again Monica, thinking about your partner
in unpartnerly like ways...ahhh too hell with it, I've
had to many sleepless nights not to think about him,
what's the harm in just one fantasy?  "You ready to go
then John?"

 

"Of course, here let me help you with that" John lifts
my briefcase and laptop and carries it out to his car
in front of my building.



"You really didn't have to go through all the trouble
John"

 

"It was no trouble at all, I love to help out a friend
in need, plus your car is sorta gone, no need to call
for a taxi when I'm around the corner."



"The corner?  John you're a riot."  He put my luggage
in the backseat then climbed into the car.    

 

"Oh it's not that far, at least not when you're flying
on the expressway."



"Well just don't drive like that with me in the car...I
really don't want to end up mangled to some pole on
I-64 John."

 

"Don't sweat it Monica, I can handle the road."

 

Then we pulled out of my neighborhood and hit the
highway.  The drive wasn't so bad, we talked a bit
here and there about work and our recent case then
somehow Dana came into the conversation.  

 

"You know Mon, I worry about Scully and William, maybe
we should be sending them away with Muldah" I just
love how John speaks, his especially the sound he
makes it's like this erotic sound coming from deep
within his core, it must be that New York accent, I
find so incredibly attractive.  Oh, haha he's giving
me this look "what?"

 

"Are you alright Monica, I just asked you something
and you completely ignored me, you just don't seem
like yourself today."

I guess it was because I didn't respond "Just
daydreaming again John, sorry.  Yeah I worry about
them too, but we can't let our fears get the best of
us."



"I know Mon, you've never seen me be irrational or
anything, I guess I just...well...you know..."



"You care about Dana, yes John I know"

 

"Of course I care about her, as much as I care about
you.  I guess it's just that she was my partner here,
and when she lost Mulder and I was assigned to find
him, I sort of became attached to her.  She was the
first person I felt that was being friends with me,
without knowing my history, about my son and all.   I
knew she wasn't being friends because she felt sorry
for me."    

 

"John, I really hope you don't think that about our
relationship.  You know that's not why I'm here,
because I feel sorry for you.  I lo...I care about you
too, and our friendship, plus this is the best thing
you could have done for me, The X-Files.  It's my
dream job, and you know it."  I rested my hand upon
his thigh, and could feel him jump from the impulse of
my touch.  



"Um yeah."

 

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, I was just
trying to...oh gosh, John please don't hate me, for..."



"Monica why would I hate you?  Jeez, you've made no
sense and certainly have not acted like yourself
today, what's going on?  Does this have to do with
Mulder and Scully?"



"It always has to do with them, haven't you realized
that?" Tears started to well up in my eyes, how do I
tell the man I long for, my partner, that I want him,
I need him, and long to spend every waking hour with
him.  

 

"Monica, I don't understand what your upset about. 
What's wrong?"  We pulled into the FBI garage and he
parked the car then unbuckled his seatbelt and turned
to face me.  "Monica, I thought you trusted me damn
it.  Why don't you trust me?   Why can't you tell me
what's obviously eating you alive inside."

 

How could he tell that I've been aching with this pit
in my stomach since as far back as I can remember? 
"If it's so obvious then why can't you figure it out?"
 I didn't mean to scream at him, but my voice rose
above an octave.  My gaze shifted towards the floor,
and the tears come pouring down my face.  How was I
suppose to deal with this, with him, I can't have him
and yet I long for him.  I know he has no feelings in
this way towards me, yet I wish he did, but would he
even admit them if he did?  He obviously cares for
Dana and hasn't told her.  Which is definitely a good
thing, because I wouldn't want to see him in agony any
more that I want to see him in pain from him thinking
I don't trust him.  I realize then that I've been
selfish, in wanting him for myself, and that he
doesn't know what is bothering me.  So I answer with
what I can.  

 

"It's not that I don't trust you John." I pause
contemplating which words to choose, should I tell him
the truth?  That I've trusted him since the case of
his son, Luke, and that I still feel this emptiness
inside me, perhaps the same emptiness that he feels as
well.  I know bringing up his son; will only add a
burden to him, yet he has no idea why I've been acting
so strangely.  

Perhaps it's the realization that I have fallen in
love with him.

 

He pauses for a minute thinking of what to say next, I
assume, and I truly don't know what is on his mind. 
"Then what is it Monica" He reaches towards me and
grasps my hands, the soft delicate skin tingles
against my palm as he brushes his fingers against my
own "Because whatever it is, we can work this out.  We
always have.  I can't lose you, Monica.  You are my
best friend, you're the only person that understands
me, and you've helped shape me into who I am."  

 

"John, you don't have to..."



"I don't have to what?"



"You don't have to say such things, I can handle the
truth."



"You think I'm lying to you?  Monica you're even
crazier than I thought.  How come you can come up with
the strangest of theories, and not see what's right in
front of you?"



"What are you talking about?"

 

"Me, Monica, are friendship...us, what we have, is so
extraordinarily special, I can't even grasp the right
words to call what we have something.  It's beyond
comparison to what anyone else and I have ever
experienced."



I pull my hands away knowing that he truly wants her,
and he's just trying to be friends with me, so that he
has a partner to work with, one which won't hurt him
in the end.  The kind of hurting that I'm suffering
now.  Why don't I just tell him how I feel, because I
know that he truly loves Dana, and he'll never fall in
love with someone so crazy and complicated.

 

"What about Dana?" I finally muster up the courage to
ask.  I'm strong, I've always been open about my
feelings, but I guess with the one guy I feel a true
connection, I can't say how I feel.  Now I understand
what Dana went through to get Fox, and why it took
seven years.  I hope my life isn't that complicated.

 

"What about her Mon?  You know she and I are just
friends, hell she doesn't even see me that way
sometimes.  You're probably closer to her after
delivering William, and sitting for him from time to
time."

 

That brings back memories of which I'd rather not
remember, poor Scully, fearing for the life of her
child while in labor with her son, she's certainly got
more courage than me.  But also the most pleasant
thoughts as well, watching Willy lay asleep and the
strangest of things happening, his mobile moving on
its own...I didn't tell Scully of that, she has enough
baggage to hold on to, worrying about Mulder and all,
although I'm sure she knows.  It's not something
easily to be missed.  



I realize that once again I haven't answered John and
he just looks puzzled at me, about how I daydream off
again.  "I'm sorry John, I guess I really am not
acting like myself today."



"It's all right Mon, do you want me to take you home?"

 

"How about after the meeting?  I could use a nap, I
hardly slept an ounce last night."

 

"Alright, come on, let's get going before the A.D. has
our asses in a sling."  We get out of our car, I grab
my briefcase and laptop and step into the elevator. 
A.D. Follmer is following us in as well.  

 

"Well hello Monica, how nice it is to see you this
morning.  Don't we have a meeting within the hour? 
Oh, and Monica, I need to see you early, stop by about
fifteen till so I can have a word with you."



"Yes sir" I reply then he steps out of the elevator.  

 

John turns to me and asks me "What was that about?"  I
consider telling him about our history together, and
realize that this is not the time or place, but it
does give me a reason as to why I've been acting
strangely around him.

 

I reply to John, "Oh that, yeah we need to talk, just
not here.  I'll stay for today, and then when you drop
me off home tonight we can talk.  Alright?"  I realize
what I've said before it has left my mouth, and know
that tonight could become a dangerous game, one that
I've played once before.  

 

"Sure, whatever works best for you Monica.  So long as
you're feeling alright."

 

"I'll manage, I'm just a little tired that's all."  
It's not really a lie.  I am tired from the lack of
sleep I've had over the past week.  

Staying up late and thinking about John, I guess I'm
at that age where you reach your sexual peak, and I
don't have anyone to reach it with.  

Hoover Building

"Sir, you wanted to see me?" I step into A.D.
Follmer's office, and he quickly ushers me in, and
shuts the door.  



"Monica, you look beautiful today."



"Brad" I respond warningly "We've been over for two
years, we can't just pick up those pieces we've been
missing."



"That's it Monica?  You're just going to give up on
'us'..." He gives me those sad puppy dog eyes and tries
to extend out his arms in a sort of hug fashion.  He
knows how I normally respond to that look, but I can't
allow myself to become close to him again.   "There is
no 'us' anymore, there hasn't been, and there won't
ever be an us again."  I know my words hurt him, but
it must be said.  I no longer have feelings towards
Brad in that way, and I hope he realizes what I'm
saying for the right reasons and not just because he
thinks I'm mad at him.  Although I should be mad at
him, we got into a pretty hefty argument before I
moved to New Orleans back in 1999.  Things didn't go
how we planned, but that wasn't any excuse for what
happened.

"Monica, I can't believe you of all people are saying
this.  Is there somebody else?  Is this because of
Agent Doggett?"  He looks at me accusingly and I know
that he can see right through me, he knows me to well,
or does he?  "Whatever is going on between you and
Agent Doggett better be by the book, don't think I
won't have you written up, wrapped up, and tossed out
of the F.B.I. Monica." 



"Sir, nothing is going on between Agent Doggett and
myself."  I stare him point blank in the face, and
hope he sees the truth in my eyes.  Nothing is going
on between us, even if I wish it were it still doesn't
change the truth. 

"You are dismissed Agent."   Brad opens the door
harshly and I walk out as if nothing was ever said. 
He knows his words hurt me, but I know the real
reasons he said those things.  He still cares for me,
even if it won't move him up in the bureau, he knows
he can always help my career.  I also know that deep
down inside himself, whether he chooses to admit it or
not, he's jealous of Agent Doggett, but for all the
wrong reasons.

Basement of the Hoover Building

I step out of the elevator and walk briskly to our
office to accompany John to our meeting with A.D.
Skinner.  I know that John wouldn't leave without me,
he'd rather come in late with me, then early and
alone, when it comes to meetings.  



"Hey John, are you ready to see A.D. Skinner?"



"Yeah Mon, did you get the report typed up last
night?" He is looking through papers on the desk, I'm
assuming for the report that I forgot to type up.  Why
shouldn't it surprise me, of all days?  

"Oh shoot, I knew I forgot to do something.  I fell
asleep early last night."



"But you said you didn't sleep at all Monica?  What is
going on, why are you lying to me?"



"It's not what you think John, I just forgot, mistakes
happen."



"Fine, if you don't want to tell me the truth, then
you better look A.D. Skinner in the eyes and tell him
some excuse.  My ass isn't going to be on the line for
this one Monica, I took the fall for you the last
time."  He storms out of the office and slams the
button for the elevator.  I close the office door, and
follow behind him.  



"John, I honestly forgot, we'll talk tonight, I
promise."



"Why can't you just tell me the goddamn truth now
Monica.  Why do I always have to wait around to hear
excuses, first Agent Scully was like this now you, of
all people Monica, I thought you were different!"



"John, you can't compare the circumstances."



"Like Hell I can't!" He gives me the evil glare, if
looks could kill, I'd be dead, and the elevator opens.
 I'm not sure if going up to see the A.D. is the best
thing right now.  John looks like he could burst any
minute, that little argument was just a confrontation.
 I've seen John, and this is nothing.  I guess tonight
could be trouble, because now I'm not so sure I want
to tell him how I feel, or what's been going on.  But
I also know that keeping this from him will probably
ruin our partnership.  

We step into the elevator, John pushes the button for
the floor of A.D. Skinner and we ride up in silence,
and might I add it was completely awkward.  Well, I
guess it's up to me to say something to him, but I
don't even know where to begin.  I guess I'll just
wait and we'll work things out when we get back to my
place. 

We step out of the elevator, enter the secretary's
office, and Kimberly tells us "You can go in, the
Assistant Director is waiting for you."  I never
understand what that means.  If he's waiting for us,
are we better off because we're not wasting our time,
or should we be waiting for him?  I never had to wait
to see Brad when he was an Assistant Director, but
then again I never dreaded seeing him either.  

"Agents, please take a seat.  It looks as though your
last case remains unsolved, do you have the paperwork
that you'll be filing?"

"Sir, about that.  My car broke down on my way home
from work last night, and I had to wait for a tow
truck, which never came, and then I had to hitch a
ride to work this morning.  I'm sorry I honestly
forgot with everything else going on, I know it's not
an excuse, but could you please give me another day?"



"You're right that's not an excuse, but we've got
bigger things going on right now.  There's a missing
persons case that needs to be solved that is top
priority.  I wouldn't have called you two in this
morning if it wasn't important but it's personal.  You
know that the first few hours are the most precious
and right now we need to do everything we can to find
the missing little boy."  The A.D's eyes began getting
hazy and misty and I knew that I needed to ask the
question.  

"Sir?  Whose little boy is missing?" 

"Agents Scully and Mulder's son, William."

My jaw dropped on the floor, how could this have
happened? When?  Where?  Who would do such a thing? 
We knew that their life was always in danger, but why
now?  There were so many questions to be answered and
very little time.   

"Sir how did this happen?"



"Agents, I think it would be best if you spoke to
Agent Scully yourself, and find out the cold hard
facts from her.  Agent Doggett you're dismissed.  I'd
like a word with you Agent Reyes."  Skinner nodded for
John to leave the office and Walter removed his
glasses from his face.  He began rubbing the bridge of
his nose, and looked upon the ground as if answers
would be lying there in front of him. 

 

"Agent Reyes, I know that you have a certain
connection between you and Agent Doggett, and the case
of his son.  I hope that Agent Scully will tell you
everything she needs to, in order for you to save
William before it is to late."  A.D. Skinner has a
puzzled look upon his face, perhaps he knew more than
he should or maybe he feared for the life of her
child, like he has all along.  

 

"Yes sir."  I responded to the A.D. and looked at him
to see if he had anything else to add to the case.

 

"Agent your dismissed."  

 

I left the Assistant Director's office feeling nausea
in the pit of my stomach.  I know I've walked these
thin lines before with a colleague and failed, and how
I fear that to be the case with Agent Scully's son as
well.  I walked out of the office and headed towards
the office to gather my belongings and head over to
Agent Scully's place and have a word with her.  I knew
that questions needed to be answered and she would be
the only person that could provide these truths.  As I
entered the basement office, I saw John sitting behind
the desk, chatting with someone over the phone.  I
could only venture as to who he might call at a time
like this.



"John, I need to head over to Dana's, are you coming
with me?"  

 

"Hold on for a minute," he replies into the phone and
then looks up at me, "Monica why don't you go ahead
without me, I've got something to take care of first,
you can take my car."

 

"Alright, call me if you find out anything."

 

"I will" John replied, then I pulled the keys off the
desk that were in front of John and I grabbed my coat
and quickly paced out the office.  I needed to get to
Dana to make sure she was all right.  I had to find
out the truths before someone else scared them out of
her, I feared for the life of that child, and now I
feared for her life as well.

 

Dana Scully Residence

 

After driving on the freeway, I pulled off at the exit
towards Agent Scully's apartment and parked in front
of her place.  It was a bit difficult to find parking,
because of all the police cars and spectators around,
curious to know what was going on.  I flashed my
F.B.I. badge to the officers in front of her apartment
and they allowed me in to see her. 

 

"Hi Dana."  She had a forest green blanket wrapped
around her shoulders to keep her warm while the police
and CSI searched her place for clues.  Her eyes were
tear stained and puffy and when I called out her name
she looked up with watery eyes once again.



"Oh Monica" her voice shivered like the cold air in
the dead of the night, and I felt for this woman, like
I felt for John Doggett.  Why should anyone have to go
through such pain, torture, and agony of losing a
child?  I knew then that there was only one thing to
do, to get her son back to her, safely.

 

"Dana, it's going to be alright, we'll find William, I
promise."  I knew that my words wouldn't mean much to
her, but it's better to have a positive outlook on
things, especially when they're gloomy as opposed to
telling her you might find her son lying face down in
the woods.  

 

"Dana, why don't you tell me what happened.  When did
you first notice William went missing?"  I approached
Dana and motioned for her to take a seat on her sofa. 
I sat next to her and listen thoroughly while taking
notes in my mind of more questions to ask her as well.
 

 

"He was gone this morning.  I woke up for work; there
was no sound in his crib.  I figured that he was still
asleep, since it was early, and I hopped into the
shower so that I wouldn't be late.  When I came out of
the shower, I got changed and went to open the door to
get the newspaper.  When I approached the door, I
noticed that the chain had been broken into two and
then I ran towards my sons crib, and he was nowhere to
be found."  Dana told me the story as if she was
reliving it.  Each pause she took was like a breath of
fresh air and a stab in the heart when she approached
the end of her narrative.

"Dana, do you know anyone that would want to take your
son?"



"Mulder always said that William was in danger, but I
truly believed that it was Fox who was in danger, not
William.  Monica, you as well as I know that there are
so many people out there that would want to take him
from me, and yet I truly have no idea as to why.  What
do they want with my son?"



"I don't know but we will find him.  John and myself
are making this case top priority."

 

"Oh Monica, what am I going to do?" Dana broke out
into sobs and I pulled my arms around her to embrace
her with compassion and loyalty.  I wanted her to know
that I was there for her, no matter what, and that if
she wanted Mulder around, we would find him. 

 

"Does Mulder know about William's disappearance?"  I
couldn't bring myself to call William Mulder's son,
perhaps it is their truth and not yet my own to know
such a thing.  I know that Mulder left a few months
ago so that he would no longer bring danger to Scully
and her baby, but it seems that is no longer the case.
 After trying to bring him back last January, we have
yet to know his whereabouts, and if anyone truly knows
how to reach him, it is Agent Scully.

 

"I...I couldn't tell him Monica.  I haven't been in
contact with him since our last potential meeting, and
he no longer sends me e-mails.  I never told you about
the last message, but he wanted to come home, and I
put his life in jeopardy by trying to send him away." 
I feel for this woman, she's been through so much. 
She rests her head upon my shoulders and looks up
towards my eyes, "Monica, when you find him, can you
tell him I lost our son?  I can't break his heart like
I've broken my own."  

 

Dana turned her head once again downwards and began
weeping for the loss of her son.  Her heart broken
more times than I can remember since I met this woman.
 Her courage has seeped through my skin and has given
me chills, more than I care to express.  For once I
wish I could ease her pain, give her Mulder's
whereabouts and their son back, and let them live
happily ever after.  An ending in a perfect world, but
ours is far from it.

 

"Dana, why don't you lie down for awhile, you could
use some rest after the morning you've had."  Dana
looked up from my shoulder and shook her head.

 

"I think you may be right Monica, but I can't allow my
son to be out there and do nothing about it.  I've got
to find him."

 

"The F.B.I is doing everything they can right now, so
is local law enforcement."  As I was about to tell
Dana that John and I were on this case, and she has
nothing to worry about, my cell phone interrupted us.

 

"Monica Reyes?"

 

"Hey Monica, it's John.  I've contacted the Gunmen and
they have something you need to take a look at.  I'm
not sure we should tell Dana what we've found until we
know what it is."  I tried responding without giving
my tone away to Dana, no need to scare her anymore
than she already is.

 

"Alright John, where do you want to meet me?"



"Well Mon, since you have the car I'll catch a cab,
and meet you at my place. Oh, and Monica, we still
have some personal matters to clear up."

 

"Yeah, I know.  I'll see you in an hour."  I hang up
my Nokia and place it into my jacket pocket.  



"Monica, what's wrong?" Dana asked with concern in her
eyes, on the brink of tears once again.

 

"Nothing Dana, you should rest.  I need to see Agent
Doggett for a little while, and then we'll let you
know what's going on."



"Monica you can't do this to me!   You can't leave me
out of the loop.  I need to know what's going with my
son!"  Scully was standing up practically screaming at
me trying to get her composure back from crying.  She
does deserve the truth, but I can't give her what I
don't know.

 

"Dana, there isn't anything happening that I know
about.  As soon as I know anything, you'll hear it
from me first, alright?"  I tried to sound honest and
caring in my reply but there was still anguish in her
eyes.  I hope she doesn't feel like I am truly cutting
her out of the investigation, because she no longer
works for The X-Files.  She's a professor at the
Academy in Quantico, and by no means do I think any
less of her abilities, I do hope she knows that. 

 

I give her hug and say my good-byes and head out to
the car on my way to John's apartment.  

 

While driving most of the way, I thought about what I
would say to John.  The inevitable would happen, and
I'd have to express my feelings to him in words, but
which words should I choose?  I stumble over the fact
that we are truly best friends and that's how we
probably always will be, and I suppose I can deal with
this.  It really isn't so bad, having him in my life
and all, so long as we have each other, I'll be truly
happy.

 

I pull up to John's house, let myself out of the car,
and walk up to his home.

 

11:00 A.M.

 John Doggett Residence

 

I ring the bell at the front, and hear footsteps
pattering away towards the entrance.  The lock and
chain are stumbled upon and the door swiftly opens
with John on the other side.  



"Hey Mon, come on in." I enter at his insistence,
follow inwards, and turn around to face him while he
shuts the door.  



"I went over to see Agent Scully" I tell him and he
looks at me in a puzzling manner.

 

"What did she say?" 



"Someone came in probably while she was sleeping,
broke the chain on her lock and kidnapped her baby." 
He turns around to face his front door and motions
towards the chain "I guess I should by a proper
deadbolt you think?"

 

I let out a sigh and respond with "John, what did you
find?"  

 

"Well, I called the three stooges and they hacked into
some surveillance that has been going on in Agent
Scully's apartment for the past few months.  Once they
accessed the main database they came across a
hard-drive with encrypted files.  They're working on
decoding the information as we speak, however they did
find a video surveillance clip that was taken at 4:35
A.M. this morning." 



"Well, what was on it?"  He had me intrigued by his
words, hanging on for more with every breath he took. 


 

"They're trying to clear up the video file, it's very
basic footage, however it gives us a suspect in the
kidnapping...here's a single image that was taken from
Agent Scully's apartment."  He handed me an image that
looked like surveillance from a 7-11, blurry and
unrecognizable.  The grainy image was hard to
determine what the person looked like, however the
suspect was obviously a female and she was bending to
pick up William in his crib.

 

"What are the stats of our female suspect?"  I asked
him.



"She's around 5'2, 120 lbs, we assume her age is
around 18-24, that's all we can tell from this.  Once
the boys clean some of the distortion we should be
able to match her if she's in our database."  I looked
at him puzzled, why would this young girl wish to take
William from his mother?  

 

"I guess I don't see the connection just yet, in time
we will.  I assume I should call Agent Scully and let
her know the latest news."



"Actually Monica, I'd rather wait to see what else we
could find.  I don't want to worry her anymore than
she already is.  Once we get a much more reliable
visual image we can certainly show her the photograph
and see if she can identify the suspect."

 

"But John, the most critical hours are..." He
interrupted me and put his fingers upon my lips to
shush me.

 

"I know Monica, I've been there.   I think it would be
best to give her what she needs when she needs it.  We
know all of her contacts and what not, and if we don't
know who this woman is, I truly doubt she will
either."



He had a good point, but I didn't want to see Dana
suffer any more than what she already had been going
through.         

"Now, onto other subjects, about this morning.  What
was going on?"

 

"John, I'm not so certain right now we should be
talking about this, we have work to do."



"Your right Monica, we can talk in the car, lets head
on over to the Lone Gunmen's and see if they cleared
up the picture and surveillance video any more."

 

We head out his front door to the car.  

 

"Why don't you drive John?  I think it'd be better,
given the circumstances."

 

"Alright."  We hopped on in his car and took off for
the highway.  John knows the best routes when it comes
to heading places, and since I'm still relatively new
to the area, it's best that he drives anyhow.  I turn
on the radio and channel surf, if you really want to
call it that.  I stop on this new song that I find
incredibly catchy, it has a sort of Mexican twist to
it, and being from the south and all, I do love salsa
and what not.  

 

Estoy loca enamorada de ti
It seemed to be like the perfect thing for you and me

It's so ironic you're what I had pictured you to be

But there are facts in our lives we can never change

Just tell me that you understand and feel the same way

 

The words are perfect in describing my relationship
with John, do I have the courage to tell him this, or
just listen to the song in its entirety?  
"John listen to the words, this is a great song."

 

This perfect romance that I've created in my mind
I'd live a thousand lives each one with you right by
my side

But yet we find ourselves in a less that perfect
circumstance 

And so it seems like we'll never have the chance

 

"Wow, deep Mon.  It's a rather catchy tune though."



"Yeah, I think it describes our relationship rather
well."

 

Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny

And you can't move on even though you try

Ain't it strange when you're feeling things you
shouldn't feel 

Oh I wish this could be real

Ain't it funny how a moment could just change your
life

And you don't want to face what's wrong or right

Ain't it strange how fate can play a part

In the story of your heart

 

"Damn" John replied rather strangely, and for once I
couldn't judge his reaction.  I had a strange feeling
that this song would mean something for both of us,
but I didn't expect it to be as blatant.  It really
was 'deep' as he said and wow it said everything that
I was afraid to.  


Sometimes I think that a true love can never be

I just believe that somehow it wasn't meant for me

Life can be cruel in a way that I can't explain

And I don't think that I could face it all again

I barely know you but somehow I know what you're about

A deeper love I've found in you, and I no longer doubt

You've touched my heart and it altered every plan I've
made

And now I feel that I don't have to be afraid

 

"Man I thought the last verse was rather familiar, and
I normally don't make connection Mon, that's your
department" He gave me one of those rare smiles that
he has locked away for special circumstances and I
realize that perhaps this is one of them.  

 

The chorus of the song plays on and my heart fills
with fervor.  I know that he feels the same way, and
even if he can't admit it to me, he at least as
admitted to himself for now.

 

I locked away my heart

But you just set it free

Emotions I felt held me back from what my life should
be

I pushed you far away

And yet you stayed with me

I guess this means

That you and me were meant to be

 

"Wow, that gave a lot more away than I probably wanted
to, but you have to admit John, 'I pushed you far
away' isn't that vaguely familiar, at least lately
more than ever?"

 

"Yeah, what's been going on, is there something
between you and Follmer I should know about?"

I laughed at his statement, Follmer, and me that was
old news.  



"Yeah, but that's dead and forgotten, at least from my
end.  Yes, Brad has been hitting on me lately, he
doesn't want to accept that we're through but that's
because" I took a deep breath for what I knew would
come next.

 

"That's because I'm in love with someone else." 



John turned his head towards me and gave me this
strange look in his eyes, I'm not sure if he was
trying to read me, or read right through me as if I
were lying to him.

 

"John you know me better than to lie to you."



"True, so who is this love of your life?"  

 

"John"



"Yeah? Who Monica?"

 

"Nevermind."  I just tried telling him, it was him,
and he didn't seem to catch on.  I guess some guys are
dense, but John is not normally that way.  Maybe he
doesn't feel the same way.  No point in looking any
more like an ass than I already do.  I can't believe I
told him that song describes us.  Well it does, at
least with our friendship, and it does describe how I
feel about him.  

 

Oh John, if only you knew and understood what I was
trying to tell you.  Perhaps you would return the
gesture someday.  I suppose for now, I shall stay
lonely and alone, but have you by my side as a friend.
 I guess I can live this way; I'd rather not...but
sometimes there isn't much of a choice.  

 

After another few moments of silence between us, I
turned the station in hopes of something more, I don't
know, not so personal that I shall have my heart
ripped from me.  He doesn't try and yet I fail to tell
him the truth of why I am not with Follmer, one day,
in the near future I will.  When the time is right,
but this isn't the time.  We have bigger things to
deal with, finding Scully's baby first and foremost.

 

Some moments are stolen in time.  Moments that when
rushing past you, you know not what to do, but as time
skips a course you know what could have been done. 
Each moment passing is truly a moment lost and yet you
still wish to find a reason to see through to future
moments and do the same again.

 

12:34 P.M. 

Lone Gunmen Residence

 

We arrive at the Lone Gunmen's and await their
approval to let us in.  These boys truly are the most
paranoid people I've ever met.  Asking us, no rather I
shall say interrogating us to make sure we are well,
us.  After a few questions and what not, they unlock
the doors and step aside for us to come in.  Frohike,
the shortest of the three, hands me a folder.  



"These are the surveillance photos we were able to
capture and fix up a bit."  Frohike added rather
proud.

 

Byers shuts the door and places all the locks back as
they were, and Frohike goes on "It took a lot of work,
but we've come up with your suspect.  She goes by the
alias Shelita.  We had to do a lot of underground
digging because there is no file on her, no birth
record, nothing, she doesn't exist."



"She has to exist, she took William from his home." 
Doggett replied sternly.

 

"Yes, we've thought about that," replied Byers "and we
also believe that she works within the government, on
a secret project known as Star 4.  We've yet to
determine all the findings and what not of the
project, but it goes deep.  It goes into the F.B.I.,
and Agent Reyes I think you might want to take a look
at who's involved." 

 

I walked towards Byers as he motioned towards the
screen.  There was surveillance set up in a park
somewhere outside of D.C., and Assistant Director Brad
Follmer was speaking with Shelita.  

 

I spoke up "There has to be a mistake or something?" 
I was baffled that Brad, my Brad, well he might not be
mine now, but still would he go through all the
trouble to kidnap Agent Scully's son.  

 

"So you know the guy?  He works for the F.B.I., in
your building actually. A.D. Brad Follmer" Responded
Langly after pulling up Brad's file on screen.  

 

"Yeah, Brad and I had a thing back in New York."  I
looked down towards the ground, ashamed of what I was
involved in, and with whom.  What if I led Brad along
and was trapped into this since the beginning?  What
if my coming to work in D.C. led him to kidnap Dana's
son?  There were so many questions, and I knew if I
said them to John he would think I was even more
paranoid than good ole' spooky Mulder.  

 

"Monica, I swear if you have anything to do with
this!" John shouted towards me.  



"John, don't you trust me?"  I pulled his hand towards
mine and he pushed me away coldly. 

 

"I don't want to be involved with someone who is
taking orders from the other side."



"John it's not like that.  I told you what Brad and I
had is over.  It's been over for two years, and why am
I the only person that sees that?" 



John looked at me with burning eyes, beads of sweat
perspiring off his head, "You better damn well be
telling me the truth, because if I find out
otherwise!" John might has well have been screaming
because I didn't even notice the Lone Gunmen standing
around anymore.  We were in our own world.  

 

"John, there's no reason to suspect Monica of
anything." Frohike coughed up.  He tried to sound
truthful but he was afraid that John would beat his
ass for butting into their conversation.

 

"Yeah well, I don't want to find out otherwise" John
retorted.  He moved over towards the door, unlocked
the layers of deadbolts, and stormed outside into the
alley.  "Find another ride home Mon, I've got business
to take care of."  

 

"Yeah fine."  I looked over at the boys and they
nodded in affirmation of a ride home.  

 

John jumped in the car and pulled out of the alley
within seconds and I was standing at the doorway
feeling deserted and abandoned.  How dare he think I
would be involved in anything like that? 

 

"Earth to Agent Reyes." Chimed Byers.  Apparently he
was repeating it several times, when I noticed his
hand waving in front of my face. 

 

"Yeah?"



Frohike replied with "Man do you have it bad for the
skeptic, eh?  We should analyze some of that water in
the basement."  

 

I laughed at his question and at his statement, I
suppose my answer was a submission of guilt on that
one, but how else would I answer them?  I tried
telling John but he didn't seem to understand or
reciprocate.

 

"Don't worry, he likes you too, he's just upset
because this brings back old memories.  The kind of
moments stolen in time.  Like his son Luke."  Byers
was right, and I knew that I had to be there for John
because he was reliving this moment in time once
again.

 

"That reminds me" piped in Langly, "the information
that we've come across on Star 4 is that they have
kidnapped children before, but it appears as though
they are kidnapping to save Agent Scully's little boy.
 Most of the young children that they take, they
kidnap to save them from the evils of the world.  From
the men of another project and belief, that wants
these children dead.  As far as we know, Agent
Scully's baby is safe, so long as these other men
don't get a hold of William."  

It took a moment to register what Langly had said.  

 

"So you mean to tell me that they believe they're
protecting her child?"



"Yes something to that affect, but it's not guaranteed
who Shelita is working for.  Brad is apparently in on
one of the projects, the one that wants William dead
is our suspicion, and his contacting her makes things
seem rather strange, and gloomy.  

 

There's no guarantee that William is safe until we
have him in our own arms."  Byers responds.  

 

I nod in understanding of what this all means.  I knew
there was more than what meets the eye, but I also
need to know whom Brad is working for, and where
William is.  I figure that if it comes down to it, I
could seduce, destroy and perhaps find out the truth
of it all if I spent an evening with Follmer.  Oh the
idea makes me sick, nauseating, but who ever said
anything about sleeping with him?  I could tease and
toy with him until he tells me what I need to know. 
Although there is a fear that John won't understand
what's going on.  I suppose that is a risk I'm going
to have to take.  

 

I tell the boys I've got things covered, and they
offer to drive me back to Agent Scully's, so I can
give her the news, whether good or bad.  On the drive
back over, I begin to think about John and the fact he
keeps running off.  Perhaps he knows more than he's
giving away himself.  Or perhaps I truly am paranoid.

 

2:00 P.M.
Dana Scully Residence

 

I arrive at Agent Scully's home again and this time
the police cars have all gone their own separate ways,
but there is one car I recognize as I step out of the
Lone Gunmen's van...Skinner's car.   

 

I step inside her apartment foyer and ring her
doorbell, awaiting her arrival.  When she opens the
door she allows me to enter and she locks it behind
me.  She looks stricken from the pain of her anguish
and I know that what I shall tell her might relieve
some of her suffering.    

 

"Dana, I've found some information on the
disappearance of your son."  When I speak these words,
I stumble for my grasp to sit down, with all the
memories flooding back to me, of Luke Doggett and
trying to save John's son before it was too late.  I
take a seat on her couch and try to appear calm and
cool, although I feel dizzy and nauseated.  I can't
let this woman see my fear because she has enough of
her own to stumble upon.  

 

She looks at me questioningly and reassures me to go
on with my findings.  Aren't I supposed to be the one
comforting her?  

 

After all, her son has been kidnapped just a few short
hours ago.  

 

Skinner steps in from the back room, and he puts his
cell phone away.  "I just got a call from the bureau,
I need to go in for a few hours.  Agent Reyes, I'd
like you to keep an eye on Agent Scully while I'm
gone."  It's not a question, nor should it have to be,
I nod in affirmation, and take Dana's hand in my own. 




"It's going to be alright."  She shakes her head and
leans it back upon the sofa.  Tears welling up in her
eyes, and her pain barely recognizable shines through
her tough layer of skin.  "It's alright to cry Dana,
your son has been taken from you, and I'd be bawling
if I was in your shoes.  John would be too..." And
then I stop myself.  I've gone to far and I can see
her pain and 

John's molded together.  Anguish and suffering alike
and I realize that I couldn't save his son, what makes
me think otherwise now? 

 

Assistant Director Skinner has already left and shut
the door, and I stand up to grab a piece of paper to
scribble a note.  Scully stops me, and grabs my arm as
I try to stand up.  "I need to grab something.  I'll
only be a moment Dana."  I look into her eyes, like
those of a child, and know that she understands.  She
realizes my arm and I grab a piece of scrap paper from
her counter and a pen.  I walk over towards the couch
again, and sit down.  I scribble a few words onto the
paper, and show them to her, so that any prying eyes
into the room won't know what I have written.

 

She understands why I'm doing this.  I want to tell
her everything I know, and I also realize that this is
dangerous.  The same people that have kidnapped her
son, also were watching her, and are most likely
watching us now.  We stand up in a swift motion.  Dana
grabs her keys, cell phone, gun, and badge.  We step
out the door after locking it and motion for a taxi.  

 

Once inside the taxi, I tell the driver to take us to
my apartment, and we sit back and wait, because there
isn't anything we can truly do right now.

 

2:15 P.M.

Grant Towers South

Northern Illinois University

 

"Hey little fellow, it's going to be all right." The
mysterious woman opens the car door and pulls out
William from a car seat.  

 

She lifts him to her shoulder, and pulls a blanket to
help cover him from the cold winter air.  She appears
to be taking pretty decent care of him, since he's
bundled in new clothes, and has a new distinctive toy
in his arms as well.  



William looks up at the mysterious woman, intrigued by
her eyes.  They appear to have a natural star-like
shape, which he points to, and she laughs at how cute
the little one is.  "Oh William, you can be so
adorable you know.  Yes, we've been watching you, and
we think it's time you learned of your very essence
and existence in this world."

 

2:30 P.M.

 

Agent Scully and myself were sitting in the cab on the
ride over, and my cell phone started to ring. 



"Reyes" I answered.  

 

"Agent Reyes, I think it would be best if you took
Agent Scully someplace safe to stay for tonight."  It
was A.D. Skinner on the phone, but he seemed strange,
bothered or something.  



"What is it?"  I asked him.

 

"There's been some threats on Agent Scully's life in
regards to William."



"That doesn't make any sense."



"It doesn't have to; I need you to take her to a hotel
or something for the evening.  Your house isn't safe
either Agent Reyes.  

 

Might I suggest you and Agent Doggett find a place to
stay as well."

 

"What is all this about?" I ask him.  "What the hell
is going on sir?"



"There's been several threats called in on your lives,
and I think it would be best to stay someplace where
you aren't being watched."

 

"Thank you sir."  I hang up the phone and report to
Dana our new plans.  Then I called John and told him
to meet us at the 

Marriott Inn.     

 

2:58 P.M.
Marriott Inn

 

We arrived at the front desk of the hotel and arranged
for two rooms, one so that Agent Scully and myself
would be safe, and the other room for Agent Doggett. 
We signed the papers and received our keys for two
adjoining rooms in the hotel.  

 

Agent Doggett entered briskly into the hotel.  "Would
you mind telling me what this is all about Mon?"

 

"A.D. Skinner called me earlier and mentioned that it
would be best if we stayed in a hotel tonight."  I
leaned closer to John to whisper the next tidbit.  I
didn't see any point in Agent Scully getting worked up
over nothing at the moment. "There have been threats
on our lives, and perhaps Williams as well."



"That's hogwash Monica, we don't even have William." 
At the rise of his tone, Agent Scully heard his
comment about her son, and storms over to him and
demands to know what we are talking about.



"Agent Doggett, is there something that you would like
to share with me? You or Agent Reyes because right now
I feel like I'm in the dark, when I should be out
trying to find my son."  Her voice now an octave above
her ordinary tone, and she was trying to keep from
drawing attention to our situation by screaming.

 

"Dana," I speak up, I know that John and her don't
always get along. "We're just looking out for you. 
You know that I wouldn't keep anything from you."

 

John looks at me accusingly and pulls me to the side
so that Agent Scully won't hear him.  He whispers in a
harsh tone.  "What the fuck is going on Monica?  You
haven't told me the truth since this morning when you
said you weren't acting like yourself, and now this. 
What has gotten into you?  What do you know about
William?"  

 

I move back towards Agent Scully so that she doesn't
feel left out of our conversation and I ignore John. 
If he's mad, he can sure as hell get over it, because
right now there are other concerns on my mind, and
Dana is right.  She should know what is going on.

 

I hand John the key for his room, and I take Dana's
bag and my own and carry them to our room.  I let Dana
inside, and I tell her I'll be with her in a minute to
explain everything.  I walk over towards John's room,
next door, and I stop him before he enters.  I grab
his hand and squeeze it so that he knows I'm still
here.  



"John, what has happened between us?  This morning
things were different, and we were going to talk
tonight, but we've certainly got side-tracked, and now
this..." I wait a moment for him to process everything
I've said.  "It seems as though you don't trust me
anymore, and I can't seem to understand why.  Why
won't you let me in John?  I know your suffering from
the loss of your son, but you don't have to suffer
alone.  You know I'd give anything to be with you, and
I'm not just talking about a one night stand either." 


 

John looks up at me, and squeezes me hand in
affirmation.  "I know Monica, but things have been
different, I didn't want it to end up this way, but we
can't change our fate."



"What has changed?  You came to me two years ago, and
I turned you away.  Every night after that I thought
about you and about why I did it.  I was afraid.  I
was afraid to get involved with someone who lost his
son.  But now, now I feel as though I lost a son as
well, and a friend.  I don't want you on the other
side of that wall anymore John.  I want to spend my
life with you, and you can't tell me you don't want
the same."  I'm standing close enough to him that I
can feel his breath on my lips and I realize that he
hasn't moved away, and I shouldn't allow this moment
to be stolen from us like the rest.  I lean in towards
his lips, to kiss him and taste the flavor of his
youth.  Just as our lips brush against one another, I
hear the adjoining hotel door SLAM hard.  I realize
that Agent Scully must have heard what was going on
and I motion towards the door.   We laugh at how
childish we seem, and I speak up "I need to go talk
with her.  I'll see you later, alright?" 



"Sure Mon."  He enters his hotel room and shuts the
door.  I hope he's not shutting me out of his life as
well.

 

I turn around, and use the key that is in my pocket to
enter our hotel room as well.

 

"Dana?" I call out.  I look around the room, and she
is nowhere to be found.  I know that she couldn't have
left because we were right outside the door and I
heard it SLAM.  I start to feel a nauseated turmoil in
the pit of my stomach and laugh that maybe she is in
the bathroom.  I knock on the door and there is no
answer, so I turn the handle, and there she is,
sitting in the corner, crying her eyes out. 



"Oh Dana," I come over to her and kneel down beside
her.  "Everything will turn out alright.  Why don't we
go sit someplace much more comfortable and we can
talk.  How does that sound?"  

 

She rises with me and I follow her to the bed.  She
sits down on the twin size bed and I sit opposite of
her on my own.  We're facing each other and I look
down to see her swinging her legs like a child who
just learned about the feeling of gravity.  

 

Sometimes she seems so calm and tranquil and the next
she's broken into pieces.  I can't allow her to be
broken because of her missing son, because John went
through that once before, and so did I.  I know what
it's like for my best friend to lose a loved one, and
I don't want to see Dana suffer any longer.  



I rise from my bed and she scoots over so that I can
sit beside her.  She looks up at me, with tear stained
eyes and says to me 

 

"Why?"

 

"Dana, I'm not sure any of us can explain everything,
but right now you need to be strong.  There are things
I learned today while at the Lone Gunmen's and I want
to tell you everything that I found, but you have to
hear me out first.  I don't want you to be upset with
what I'm going to tell you."

 

I glance down at her necklace and tell her "You've got
to have faith."

 

"I'm not sure that I do." She mumbles in response to
my comment, and I know that she maybe a scientist at
heart, but she also has become a believer in the
paranormal. 

 

I stand up and move towards my bag to grab the folder
that the boys gave us.  I hand it to her, like Frohike
handed it to me, and tell her all that I've come to
know.

 

"Dana, have you heard of the Star 4 project?"



"Yeah it's a top secret cult group that abducts.... you
think they're involved in William's disappearance?" 
Her eyes light up like she's on to something more,
like it has given her hope to keep searching for the
truth.

 

"They may be.  There's been recent surveillance of
your apartment."



"Yeah I know," she answers, "they are watching" she
adds in response as well.  

 

"That's part of the reason I had to get you out of
there Dana, because if they are watching, then your
life is in danger as well."

 

"What do you mean my life?  I thought this was about
William and his disappearance," as she adds motion to
the folder to add emphasis to her words.  

 

"It is Dana, but it also involves your life as well,
and mine, and John's."  She sits there thinking to
herself on the bed.  Dana 

doesn't know whether all of this is true but she
certainly jumps up like she's found the answer to it.

 

"I've got to get hold of someone who might know where
he is."



"Who?" I ask her.  

 

"A source.  I can't say, but he can."  She starts
towards the door, and I grab her arms so she can't
leave.  "What are you doing Monica?"

 

"Your life is in danger.  Aren't you hearing a word
I'm telling you?  If you step outside of this hotel,
the cult of evil, they are after your son, and they
don't realize that he's gone.  They'll take you and
torture or kill you until they have him...and since we
don't know where he is, they can't get to him.  So he
might not be as bad off as we thought."

 

"He's my son!" She screams at me and I drop hold of
her arms.  I back off because I know that she doesn't
want this, me trying to protect her, and realize that
I can still back her up if I must.  



"We're trying everything we can Dana, but it's
important that your safe so when you get your son
back, he has a mother to come home to."

 

Those words struck her deep and she fell to the ground
in a heap and tears started to flow down her cheeks.  



"What if he doesn't come home?  What if he doesn't
make it?"



"We're not going to let that happen" I tell her, and
once I again I help raise her from the ground and put
my arms around her for support.  I walk with her to
the bed and she lies down and shuts her eyes.  I sit
with her a few minutes and she doesn't stir so I
gently remove myself from her bed when I hear the
faintest whisper from her 

 

"Do you really think he's in good hands Monica?" 



"Honestly Dana I don't know, but given that he's not
with the people that want him dead, that's good."

 

Dana rolls over and falls asleep for a short while, so
I figured it would be best now if I went into John's
room and spoke with him.

 

4:48 P.M. 

 

I knock on the adjoining door and hear John stir in
his room.  He opens the door and allows me access to
his room.

 

"Come in Mon."

 

I enter and shut the door behind myself quietly as not
to wake Dana from her slumber.

 

"John, we need to talk."



"Yeah, we certainly do."

 

Apparently his room has a queen-size bed, so I sit
down and he paces back and forth.  "Monica, what's
going on?"



"What do you mean?" I ask him.  "I thought I made my
feelings perfectly clear."

 

"Monica to you clear is well, what about earlier this
morning?  With Follmer?  What did you two have going
on?  And why now are you all over me?"

 

"John" I pause, trying to think before I speak,
apparently setting my heart out hasn't worked in this
case.  "This morning I told you, things just started
out shaky, I didn't have much sleep, and what about
Follmer?  We had something going on two years ago,
certainly not now."



"What's that suppose to mean?" he asks me.  Does he
truly question my motives?

 

"I'm not in love with Follmer, I told you this earlier
in the car.  Our relationship was strictly sexual, not
based on love or friendship."  I avert my gaze as my
eyes become misty remembering why I broke up with
Follmer, he wanted my body, and I wanted his heart.   


 

"Yeah Mon you said that already.  So who's this guy
your in love with, and what the hell did we get
ourselves into in the hallway just a short while ago?"

 

I look up at him, tears overflowing the rims, and he
realizes his words have stung me as cold and brutal.  

 

"It doesn't matter" I respond "because he apparently
doesn't love me."  I look up and he sees my pain that
he's caused and I see his as well.  The suffering ache
of his lost son, the pain of me turning him away two
years ago, and now this, Scully's baby missing it's
too much to deal with in such a short time.  

 

"Monica of course that's not true.  What's not to
love?"  He gives me one of those rare smiles he saves
for rainy days, and you know what, it is a rainy day. 
At least in all of our hearts, the rain is pouring
out, and the pain is truly unbearable.  



"Monica, you still look incredibly tired, why don't
you lay down for awhile and take a nap.  When you get
up we can talk about 'us'.  Alright?"

 

"Alright."  I stand up to head back towards my room,
and he stops me in his tracks, with a sly grin and his
hands around my waist. 



"Where do you think you're going?"  He asks me and I
turn around to face him.

 

"I was taking your advice, and was going to get some
rest."

 

He answers me in a low seductive tone "I meant in
here, with me."

 

My knees buckle in his arms and I swear my heart skips
a beat.  Did he just say what I think he said?  My
eyes must have bulged out because he responded with
"...you don't actually follow everything by the book
Agent Reyes, do you?"

 

I laughed a low husky tone, and grabbed his hand and
we walked towards the bed.  "You know John, all I
really want to do is take a nap right now though. 
You'd never guess why I didn't sleep much last night."


 

"Because you were up late thinking about me?"  His
response struck me like a chord.  How could he have
known that, unless his thoughts were similar to mine? 
How would he have known he's the reason that I toss
and turn all night, wondering what will happen
tomorrow and thinking about every moment that has been
stolen before us?

 

"Come on, he motions, let's lie down.  All I want is
to hold you when you sleep anyhow.  At least for now."
 He winks at me, and we lie down under the covers, and
I rest my eyes because I know that this case will take
up all night.   

 

Time flows forward, moments rushing past in an endless
course of time.  As endless as the sun that sets and
in time shall set for ones own life.  No one knows
when the time shall come, but what if you could change
the course of your path of fate?  What if your destiny
was to change another's fate and risk your own life in
the process?  Would you accept the reality without
knowing the consequences of your actions?  What if you
had no choice but to act on something you saw,
experienced, and felt?

 

I stand frozen in time, motionless as if the world
moves on without me knowing the danger of my being
here.  I'm standing in a narrow hallway outside of a
small room.  The door is shut and we can't wait much
longer.  We pound on the door and she nods and I kick
it in.  We enter, gun drawn and see three women, one
watching over William, who is moving the mobile in the
crib. 

 

Gun drawn we bust on in and recognize the situation we
are in, truly the inevitable.  Agent Mulder is there,
being held hostage with a gun to his head.  Dana's
eyes are full of tears as she sees the two guys in her
life about to be stolen from her.  We have no choice
but to put down our guns and let this situation play
out.  Backup is on the way, and we can only hope that
they come in time.  



The woman holding the gun on William speaks up, "Oh
the Irony Agent Scully.  You had to come looking for
your son, and you caused all this.  You couldn't have
waited just a few minutes longer."



"What the fuck are you talking about!"  Dana screams
at the woman.

 

"We took your son to prevent this very instance, and
yet it still has come down to this.  We've been
watching you since you walked into the basement office
over nine years ago and were assigned to a project
known as The X-Files, and we know since then you have
been given a gift.  You might not even remember or
realize the power of it, but we do.  You have been
given the power of immortality and if you shall choice
to use this power, it will only protect one, not both,
and in turn sacrifice your own life.  You have the
power to make the decision of the future Agent Scully.
 Who shall live and who shall die."

 

"Why are you doing this?"  Dana cries out and falls to
the ground in tears pleading for the lives of those
she loves.

 

"We must kill both to ensure the future of our
civilization since we realize you can save one of
them.... the answers aren't for you Scully, they're for
your son.  "  

 

 Dana looks to Mulder, who nods in understanding and
his dying words come out "save our son, it's his fate
to save mankind."  

 

The gunfires and it takes the life of the man she
loves.  She had no choice; only more lives would have
been sacrificed if anything else had been done.  Her
eyes fill up to the brink and she crawls towards
Mulder's lifeless body.  She knows she must save her
son, and in doing so she is being robbed of her own
life, like the man she loves was robbed.  I bend down
beside her, and she puts her hand on my arm, "I need
you to take care of William, please Monica, you are
the only one I trust with him."  Tears are flowing
down her face and she's shaking with the loss of her
loved one.  She sees the gun rise towards her son, and
she screams out "No, don't" and they shoot lower on
the child.  She runs over to William and tells him not
to look at death.  She places her hand on him and
steals this moment in time.  She gives the gift once
given to her, to her son.  

 

Her dying words come out 'William it is your fate to
save mankind, you must never forget..." I rush over to
Dana and she has no pulse.  I realize there was
nothing I could do since it was a hostage situation
with more people holding guns than agents.  I turn to
see the three members of Star 4 take their guns and
lift them up, they look at me and speak out "This
wasn't suppose to happen and the fourth one shall know
what to do", and they shoot off their guns
simultaneously towards themselves to end their own
lives.  

 

I feel myself being brought into the light of day by a
voice so common it feels natural.  



"Monica" John speaks out and he's trying to shake me
from the dream I've had.  Apparently I've awoken him
from his own slumber and I realize where I am after a
moment.

 

"John we've got to find him" I speak out to him and he
nods at my response.  

 

"I know," he states and his eyes look grim like those
of death and longing.  I fear for John and how he has
to relive this and what it's doing to him.  

 

"John why don't you go home.  You don't need to be out
here on this case."



He interrupts my thoughts "Monica you very well can't
do this alone and Agent Scully is in no shape to be
working alone with."



"Please don't personalize with this case John, you'll
only end up hurting yourself."  I speak out before I
realize what I've said and he looks hurt that I'd even
say it, but it's the truth.  Some things need to be
said, and I know he realizes I'm only looking out for
him.

 

"You had one hell of a nightmare Mon" he states and I
nod with the cold sweat that's still on my brow.  

 

"It was so real, I swear I felt her lifeless body in
my arms."  He looks at me questioningly and realizes
who I'm speaking of.  



"I know," he states and with that I realize it is his
own submission of seeing the visions himself.  He
wraps his arms around me and I revel in the feeling of
his warmth.  My eyes glistening on the verge of tears
from what I've seen, and then I hear a knock at our
connecting door.  

 

I catch John's gaze and he nods approval so I call
Dana into his hotel room.

 

"Dana the door's open" She enters and doesn't look
surprised to see us in bed together.  I guess with all
the commotion earlier in the hallway, she might have
expected it.  

 

"I can't wait around any longer, I've got to find my
son," She tells me, tears falling from her eyes and
she comes and sits down on the side of the bed.  

 

I take her hand and mine and look up to her eyes 
"Dana everything will be alright."

 

"No, I had a dream" she begins, and more tears slip
down upon her cheeks.  "The group the Lone Gunmen were
speaking of, Star 4, they had my son, and I don't
know, maybe it's nothing, but they were trying to
teach him something.  I'm not sure what, but I think I
might know where they are keeping him." 

 

"Where?" I ask her.  I don't mention that John and
myself had similar dreams because I truly wish not to
scare her of the vision of death.  

 

"The youngest member, Shelita, she was carrying
William into a University.  I didn't get the name of
it, but the dorm complex was titled Grant Towers
South."

 

"We'll have to look into it." I stated and John looked
away and jumped out of bed and headed into the other
room.  

 

"Don't worry about him Dana, he just sometimes has
trouble taking leaps, you know how he is."  I smile at
her to reassure her.  

 

"If you really believe your dream has meaning we'll
look into it, alright?"



"I don't want you to just look into it, we've got to
do something before it's too late."

 

"I know Dana" I squeeze her hand and use my other hand
to wipe the tears from her eyes, "but we don't want to
risk anything either."

 

"Risk anything?  Monica? What are you talking about?"
Scully looks up at me confused and I know I must
answer her somehow, but I'd rather keep the dream to
myself.  

 

"I'm sure it's nothing, but I need you to tell me
everything on a previous case.  It involved a man who
made claims of immortality.  Do you remember the
claims Dana?"



"Yes.  He had a rare gift.  Why do you ask Monica?"



"I can't explain it, but I feel a connection between
the two cases."

 

"A vision?" She asks me, and I know that lying to her
will only make her work against me. 

 

"Actually yes...I can't seem to shake the significance
of it, and it all comes back to immortality and your
son."

 

"How so?" she questions me, and I realize that my
answers are only feeding into her pain, and when I
tell her the worst of the dream she freezes in motion.
 Her eyes bulge out, her tears fall like a river, and
the pain expands into my own heart as well. 

 

"In the vision, we found your son but we didn't expect
things to go so wrong.  Agent Mulder was there and you
had to choose between his life, your sons, and your
own...only being able to save one."



She realized the meaning of my words and the meaning
of her gift as well.

 

"Wow, then there's only one thing we can do, we have
to change the future.  If what you saw is what the
future holds, then we have to learn to make sense of
it.  Maybe you saw it so that your fate is to change
it."  



I was truly surprised that she could make sense of
things at a time like this, but what else could we
truly do?  

 

5:49 p.m.

 

"Dana, why don't you call the Lone Gunmen and have
them try to access any information on any local
universities as well as anything with the name Grant
Towers as well as Shelita.  I'm gonna speak with John
and let him know what we're doing."

 

"Alright" Dana nodded her head and wiped the tears
from her eyes.  She stood up and walked back into our
hotel room and retrieved her cell phone.  I could hear
the numbers being dialed but I couldn't see her in the
room.  

 

I stood up from the bed and walked towards the small
foyer where John was sitting with his head in his
hands leaning over.  I stepped beside him and rested
my hands on his shoulders and squeezed them gently. 



"John."

 

He looks up at my face and I can tell he's been crying
for the past few minutes while Dana and myself were
talking in the other room.  



"It will all turn out alright," I tell him
reassuringly although I feel as if I'm just trying to
reassure myself in the matter.

 

"How do you know that Mon?  Since when does what we do
matter?  It certainly didn't matter for Luke, and I
sure as hell don't want Scully to go through the same
thing I did." 

 

"John we can't guarantee anything in life, but if we
at least try, then we know that we made all the
difference we could."  

 

He looks confused at my words and speaks up to me "It
didn't seem to matter with Luke.  I tried everything I
could then, but I can't sit around here and listen to
the two of you talk about nightmares and visions. 
It's a bunch of hoopla and I don't want to lose
William to the same fate of my son."

 

He was right, us sitting around trying to keep
ourselves protected was only wasting precious time. 
Each moment that passed was a moment towards the
inevitable of finding William dead.  

 

John stands up from the chair and walks towards the
sink outside of the bathroom.  He turns on the light
overhead and washes his eyes so that Dana won't know
he's been torn apart as well.  I stand beside his
every move and come up behind him.  I wrap my arms
around him in the most endearing hug of sorts and
whisper into his ear "I'm hear for you now John.  You
can't lock up your fears any longer." 

 

He nods as if he understands the meaning of my words
and speaks out "I know.  Thank you Monica" He turns
around so that we're face to face and leans in and
brushes my lips against his.  They are soft and
luscious like the smooth feel of silk on a cool spring
day.  I pull away after our lips intertwine to do a
dance upon my heart.  I give him one of those precious
ear-to-ear grins that we so rarely encounter on The
X-Files and I look towards the room Agent Scully is
in.  He sees the anguish in my eyes and knows that his
pain is mine too and that we are forever one, in mind
and heart.

 

6:15p.m.

Room 817A

Grant Towers South 

Northern Illinois University

 

The four cult members of Star 4 entered the small dorm
room with William.   Shelita, the leader of the group,
held the little boy in her arms and watched as his
curiosity baffled her.  The little child had been
growing stronger and stronger each passing day, and
Shelita knew that the time was coming for him to learn
and train for his fate.  

 

She laid William down in a small crib in the center of
the room.  She pulled out the mysterious toy that the
boy had in his arms before and placed it in the corner
of the room.  Shelita spoke up "William I know you
want this toy.  I also know you can get it.  You have
to believe in your powers and use them wisely.  These
are the powers of which created you and may destroy
you if you do not learn them wisely.  Do not think
with these forces, let your actions be guided by them,
and not others words.  Do what is in your heart and
truly you will save yourself and all of man kind." 
William looked up at her beautiful eyes and cooed to
show that he understood.  Shelita sat down upon the
bed and waited for William to make his move.  Soon
time would fall and set and there would be nothing
anyone but William could do to save humanity.  

 

6:30p.m.

After picking up some food from downstairs John and I
sat beside Dana listening to the news that she found
out from the Lone Gunman.

"They discovered a few leads, the first being this
Shelita person from the Star 4 group.  She apparently
purchased a one-way ticket to O'Hare International
Airport in Chicago.  She was seen carrying a young boy
according to surveillance equipment, although the
young boy is still unidentifiable."  As Dana is
telling us the story in our hotel room, I notice her
hands are shaking and she's afraid for her son's life.
 This poor woman has suffered so much for what reason?
 I rest my hand upon hers to calm and soothe some of
her nervous energy that she had encountered and she
seemed unaware of our presence while she continued her
findings.

 

"The second lead was this Grant South and it dealing
with a University.  Apparently there is a college out
in the boonies of Illinois.  It's a small town, De
Kalb, and the University's dorms are in Grant Towers
South.  The boys believe that there is a connection to
William there, given that the Star 4 group meets in
this small town of De Kalb."



"Why would they take the boy to a college?"  I ask
Dana confused and intrigued by her findings.

 

"Northern Illinois University, apparently the students
wouldn't suspect having a child around.  It's not
uncommon for..."

 

"Children to have children" John chimes in.  

 

"Yes" replies Dana "I'm sure there's more to it then
that but at least that's something to go on.  A.D.
Skinner already booked three flights from Dulles to
O'Hare for tonight.  We have a few hours till we need
to be at the airport." 

 

"Did Skinner say anything else about our safety?"  I
pipe in.  I don't want to worry Dana but I also need
to know what's going on.

 

"He mentioned we'll have back up from the Chicago
Field Office and that there are already undercover
agents on campus.  

We can contact them when we get to Northern Illinois
University."

 

9:45 p.m.

Dulles Airport

 

Dana decided to head towards the bathroom before
boarding the plane and I glance over at John to make
sure he's all right going through with this.  I
whisper in his ear "I want you there, I just don't
want to see you suffer.  You've been through more than
enough."  I squeeze his hand and he smiles up at me.  
 



"I know Mon, I'll always be suffering but I can't live
with knowing that Dana could lose William because I'm
not there."  I nod in understanding of what he's
saying and kiss him on the cheek.  



"I understand," I tell him as I rest my head on his
shoulder.  He moves his arm to wrap it around me, and
I smile up at him with this new found intimacy that
we've established.  Just yesterday I was dying to tell
him how I feel, and now I know he's accepted the truth
between us.  Not that it doesn't mean we'll have a
rocky start and from time to time troubles, but I know
that we can always work it out because I love him.

 

"John" I speak up.  I want to tell him how I feel
about him.  I tried before but I'm not sure he knows
how much he truly means to me.  



Dana comes walking back and I know that I don't want
to be rude but I also don't feel like she should hear
what I want to say to John.  

 

"Yeah?" John asks me.  I want to tell him, hell I'm
dying to let him know, but I don't want to hurt Dana
anymore than she is already suffering.  I don't want
to remind her of the emptiness in her heart and in her
bed.  It's certainly not my intention and I don't want
to rub in her face what I've found.   We're friends
and I know she'd understand, but it's not fair for
her, now, with all the loss and suffering this woman
is experiencing.

 

"Uh," I stumble trying to make up something spur of
the moment "Thanks for letting me nap with you
earlier".  Maybe I should have gone for a less
intimate approach with words and just said something
like 'thanks for coming' but I didn't.  

 

He laughs a throaty deep laugh and responds to me
"Anytime you'd like to join me in bed Mon, I'd never
turn *you* down."  

 

My mouth drops and believe me I'd love to spend every
minute in bed with this man, I just can't seem to come
to the realization that he wants me in there too.

 

Dana comes back and takes a seat beside me, with John
on my left.  I remember that I still haven't figured
out the meaning of my dream and the realization creeps
up on me.  What if I can't change Mulder and Scully's
fate?  What if I change their fate and the end of the
world comes instead.  My head rests on John's shoulder
and I shut my eyes.  Thinking about the vision itself
scares me to death.  What if I have to raise William? 
And what did immortality have to do with anyways?  Is
Dana truly immortal?  Then why isn't William?  I know
that if I don't ask these questions now, soon it may
be too late.

 

I prop myself back up, and John looks over towards me
when he feels the loss of my head resting on his
shoulder.  I turn to face Dana and ask her "Do you
believe that you are immortal?"  



Dana laughs at my question, how can she not, it sounds
absurd, but is it really?  "Monica, I may be more open
to the paranormal but that's a pretty big leap to
believe that I'm immortal.  What even brings this
about Agent Reyes?" 

 

I'm not sure why she's chosen to use my last name now;
usually she does that when she wants a barrier between
us.  Am I making her uncomfortable?  Does she know
more than she's giving on to?  And does this involve
her son?  So many questions run through my head. 
Which to ask, and which to ponder?  

 

"Dana" I pause contemplating how to word what I want
to say "if you were immortal, isn't it possible that
William was passed this gift as well?" 



She eyes me warily knowing that I won't give up. 
"Monica, sometimes you really sound like Agent Mulder.
 If it were even possible to be immortal how would it
be passed on?  Are you suggesting that we run some
test?  And if there even hypothetically were a test to
run, how would we run it for my son, who is missing
right now?  And how does any of this deal with his
kidnapping?"



"Dana it makes sense.  Your DNA has to be encoded
somehow with this 'gift' of immortality, isn't it
possible that William could have been rewarded as
well."



"You make it sound like something grateful."



"And it isn't?" I ask her.  "Dana, I'm confused as to
why you wouldn't want immortality."



"What life do I have without my son and without
Mulder?  Do you think I want to live this way?"  Her
eyes well up on the brink of tears and I put my arms
around her and give her a hug.  

 

"Dana don't talk like that.  We'll get your son back. 
You've discovered where he's been kept, and as far as
we know they're trying to protect him."

 

"But what if it's too late?  What if he's already
dead?  I can't bare to think of what I'd tell Mulder. 
I can't imagine life without either one of them, and
right now I've lost both."  Her tears stream down her
face and the flight attendants call our rows for our
flight to board.  

 

John pulls out a handkerchief and Dana wipes her eyes
from the pain she's been suffering.  She holds so much
in, and yet she truly has broken down.  I've never
seen this woman so vulnerable and it honestly scares
me.  What if it was me in her situation?  I don't
believe I could keep on living, and I worry that soon
she might take her own life.     

 

We board the plane and I sit down between the two of
them.  I absolutely hate being stuck in the middle on
an airplane, but given the circumstances, I think I
could deal with being next to John for an hour and a
half.  Plus there's always the opportunity to join the
Mile High Club.  I laugh at the thought and perhaps
John is thinking to himself the same thing because he
winks at me and gives me one of those rare smiles.  

 

It seems strange, for such a rare smile, I've been
getting it a lot lately.  Maybe it's not so strange,
maybe it's the realization that we make each other
truly happy.

 

Once we're situated on the plane John puts his arm
around me and I rest my head on his shoulder again. 
"A girl could definitely get use to this." He grins at
me and glances back towards the bathroom.  "I knew you
were thinking that too." I add 

and he laughs his deep throaty laugh.

 

"So you wanna?" He asks me and I can't help but laugh
too.  



"Oh yeah" I smile up at him "But don't you think we
should wait till we get in the air?  That way it's the
Mile High Club silly." 

 

"We can always do it both ways Mon" I laugh at his
words and form visualization in my head.  I guess he
can tell because he chimes in "Are you getting a
little hot Monica?" I laugh with his words and I feel
a flush rise upon my body.  I hate being flirty around
him, but somehow I don't feel like I'm being flirty. 
I feel like I'm being me, and that's someone I haven't
been able to be in a long while.

 

10:15 p.m.


I looked over towards Dana and she has her eyes
resting like a sleeping child.  She seems so young and
vulnerable which makes the pit of my stomach churn,
poor woman.  I figure since she is asleep, she won't
notice if John and myself are gone for a little while,
say in the bathroom, and I stand up and grin at John. 
I lower myself to whisper into his ear "Are you
coming?"  I dart my tongue across my lips in a
seductive manner and he bolts towards the bathroom
with me.  

 

We walk towards the back of the plane trying to look
innocent and luckily the bathroom isn't occupied.  I
step on in, and John follows behind me.  I've never
noticed how tiny one of these stalls is until two
people are in there, and truly there isn't much room
for moving around.  Not that there'll be too much
moving, other than say a little thrusting.  

 

I wrap my arms around John and kiss him fervently.  I
part my lips to gain his tongue access into my mouth,
and my god that man has an incredibly tongue.  His
lips move down my neck and I groan out when he nibbles
on that incredible spot.  His eyes look up to me but
his lips never move and I know I need to touch his
skin.  I roughly pull apart his buttons on his shirt
and he stops my hands.  I look up at him confused and
he smiles and says "I want this as bad as you do, I
just don't want to go out there naked when we're
done."  

 

I laugh a low husky groan of approval and add to his
comment "I won't mind it so much, I'll keep you
covered."

 

He laughs and I continue to help him undo his buttons
and touch the warm skin of his chest.  I plant slow
soft kisses down his 

body and all of his shirt buttons are removed.  I move
on down his chest towards his navel and kiss and nip
his body thoroughly.  I start with his belt buckle on
his jeans and he stops by hands.  

 

"I want to see you Monica," and so he begins slowly,
in a deliberate tease and opens each button bit by bit
kissing the exposed skin he leaves behind.  When the
third button is open my bra is exposed and he gently
traces the outline of my flesh 

 

"You're so beautiful" he states and then the plane
begins to quake.  I grab hold of John to brace myself
since the plane is 

jerking and the captain comes on the loud speaker. 

 

"Everyone please take your seats and fasten your
seatbelts.  The remainder of the ride looks to be
rather bumpy.  We're going to try and level off at a
different altitude but there are some storms in the
area."  

 

"There's always the hotel room" I add after the
captain ends his speech and John laughs "Soon Monica,
soon."  

 

I'm buttoning up my top and trying to help John get
his buttoned as well.  After a few minutes of
turbulent winds and trying to get our clothes properly
arranged we both exit the small bathroom and take our
seats.  

 

When we get back Dana is awake and she has a look of
sheer terror in her eyes.  "What's wrong?" I ask her,
like I already don't know. 

 

"I'm not a fan of flying, you might say," and I
understand her completely.  She has her hand secured
to the armrest, and I remove her bolted fingers and
hold her hand to hopefully calm and relax her.  The
last thing Dana needs is more fear to deal with. 
"What took you guys so long in the bathroom?" She
adds, although the smirk on her face says she knows
more than she's giving on to and I laugh.  How could
Dana not know what has been going on?  Me sleeping in
John's bed earlier, resting my head on his shoulders,
and now this.  I quietly laugh at how I wanted our
relationship to be kept a secret and it obviously
wasn't heading in that direction.  I've been there
with Brad, and I certainly don't want problems arising
at work because of our relationship.

 

"Oh shit," I mutter up.



John looks at me with questioning eyes "What?"

 

"Brad.  I was planning on having dinner with him so
that I could find out why he was meeting with Shelita.
 I guess it slipped my mind, being with you and all."

 

I can't tell if he's hurt or confused but I know he's
thinking something, and I wish right now I could see
what's going on in that head of his.  



"Brad" he states matter of factly.  

 

"Yeah, didn't I tell you?"



"You told me that you once had a relationship with
him.  What is this about Monica?"



"His meeting with Shelita seems suspicious and sources
have confirmed that the other new-age cult group that
is after Dana's son, well there's a possibility that
Brad is involved."



"What?!?" Dana interrupts.  "Brad Follmer, the Brad
Follmer?" She asks and I nod my head.  "You mean to
tell me that he's involved and he's been involved in
our recent investigations.  That's just great!" She
adds sarcastically.  "He's had access to 

our files, and everything.  Now what?"  She looks at
me as though I have all the questions of the universe
and I shrug my shoulders.

 

"I don't know."



"Well you sure as hell should know, you've been
sleeping with him." Dana retorts and my eyes glare at
her words.  How could she think that? 

 

"What are you talking about?  Brad and I are history. 
Ancient history at that, and how do you know about it
Agent Scully?" I retort back.

 

"How do I NOT know." She remarks.  "Think about it
Agent Reyes, you call the A.D. by his first name. 
Tell me that's not a bit peculiar."  She's right with
that one.  



"Well we have not been involved for over two years, so
whatever you hear you should take it with a grain of
salt.  If you have a problem you should come and ask
me, rather than believe some dead rumors."



"The rumors aren't dead Monica.  They've been brewing
since you got here."



I didn't have a remark to retort so I just shut my
mouth and couldn't believe the argument we just had. 
Did people actually think I fucked every guy in the
office?  What the hell?  Sometimes I don't understand
people, including those who you trust with your life. 


 

I look over at John and he's sitting there in silence
like a good boy.  I guess he knows not to add any heat
to the flames and 

 

I'd love to reward him, but right now I've got bigger
things going on.  

 

Then John whispers into my ear "Monica, I know this
isn't the best time, but do you remember that phone
call I had early this morning?"



"Yeah, who was it?" I ask him.

 

"It sounded like Agent Mulder."

 

"What?!?" I exclaim.  "You've got to be kidding me
John."

 

"I wish I was.  They didn't identify themselves but
they said not to investigate the disappearance of
Agent Scully's son.  I didn't think anything of it,
given the news was out and all, but now I'm not so
certain."  



I gave him one of those evil glares "You're pissed
aren't you?" he looks up and asks me.

 

"How can I not be?  John why have you been keeping
this quiet?  Did you at least get a trace on the
number?"



"Yeah I tried, it was a cell phone and it came up
bogus.  I wanted to tell you Mon, but it hasn't been
the right time, and what about you and Follmer?  When
were you going to tell me everything about him and his
involvement with this case?"

 

"John that's different."  He's trying to change the
subject and I refuse to let him get away with it.  

 

"How so?" He questions me, and he gently moves the
hair by my eyes behind my ear.  I let out a sigh, a
breath of air I hadn't even known I've been holding. 
He then gazes at me with the saddest puppy dog
expression and what am I suppose to do?  I don't want
him mad at me and certainly I don't want to be mad at
him either.  I'd live and die for John but I truly
don't want to see him suffering because of me.  

 

"It just is."  I don't even know what to say anymore. 
I'm exhausted from our flight and from this childish
bickering.  

I should probably say something to Dana but I really
have nothing to say, her words stung me like a block
of ice smacking me in the face on a cold winter night.
 I glance over towards Agent Scully and she's buckled
in but she's turned towards the window to gaze
outside.  I can see her reflection off the glass and I
notice tears gently streaming down her cheeks.  I've
been stung by her words but I don't have the energy to
comfort her either.  She's right, about her fears with
Brad's involvement, but that certainly didn't give her
the right to say what was said.  

 

I rest my head back on the seat and shut my eyes.  I
want this night to be over.  I want to be in my warm
bed asleep, perhaps with John by my side.  However,
truly I just wish this nightmare would end and we'd
wake up already.  

 

11:49 p.m.

O'Hare International Airport

 

After arriving at the Airport we went to gather our
luggage, and John went to get the rental car.  

 

The remainder of our flight was turbulent, although
the bickering finally settled down.  I didn't say much
to Dana after our argument and I figured that I
couldn't go on forever being angry with her.  It's not
in my nature.  I could still feel the tension steaming
off her skin, and I figured that it was now or never
to settle things.  

 

"Dana I want you to know that I probably should have
told you about Brad and what I've learned, but I
didn't know he was involved till today with this
case."

 

Dana looks up at me and for once she's cool and calm. 
Perhaps she has no more tears to shed on the remainder
of the day.  

 

She looks up at me and asks plain and simply "Why?" 

 

"Why what Dana?  I don't understand?" 

 

"Why didn't you tell me that Brad knew Shelita?"  She
states it simply like she's been wording the question
for hours, and I realize that my answer will only
bring more questions upon her lips.

 

"I didn't know until a few hours ago."  I'm trying to
keep my cool, after all this is the woman who
practically called me a whore on the airplane and that
truly struck my heart like a stab in the chest.  I
didn't see it coming, although perhaps I should have. 
It wasn't that unexpected, was it?

 

"If I ask you something Monica, do you promise to
answer truthfully?" 

 

I'm hurt by her words and I answer, "I've never lied
to you.  Yes I'll answer you truthfully."

 

"Then why Brad?  What was your involvement with him
and why is he one of our leading investigators here? 
Was he brought into D.C. so that my son would
disappear, and why are you and John all of the sudden
involved?  It might not be my business about you and
John but certainly when the two of you are doing
things on bureau time it is my business."   



Wow she had a lot more to say than I anticipated and
I'm not even sure where to begin with her.

 

"Dana, what Brad and I had was in the past.  If you
want to call it a fling, fine.  However, his
transferring here has nothing to do with your son. 
I'm truly sure of that.  His involvement is still hazy
to me, and from when we worked together in New York;
he was never one to make trouble.  I admit Dana, he
seems to be stirring up trouble lately but as far as I
know it's only on The X-Files and it has nothing to do
with your son."

 

"Alright." She responded calmly.  "Then what about
John, are you using him like you used Follmer?"  Her
words caught my throat like a blade slicing through.  

 

"How could you think that?" I manage to choke out. 
"What John and I have his special.  I've known that
we've had a special connection since Luke's case, and
I can't fight off this feeling that perhaps we weren't
meant to be together."        

 

"Fate," Dana replies.

 

"I don't know.  Sometimes I truly don't believe in
fate.  I mean I use to and all, but then I got to the
realization that what if something happened to your
'fate'.  Then would you live unhappily ever after?  So
I found myself jumping to much more logical
conclusions."  I laughed at what I was saying.  "Wow,
I sound more and more like John everyday I've been
working with him."

 

"Yeah.  It's not so bad though, after all it seems
like you've found someone that makes you incredibly
happy."  



"Yeah you're right.  Thanks Dana.  I'm sorry about
before."



"I'm sorry about what I said earlier too."  We embrace
in a hug, gather our luggage, and walk outside to find
John with the rental car. 

 

Dana and I step outside to look for John.  After
awhile he cruises up to the curb in a Taurus and pops
open the trunk.  I lift the bags in and John steps out
to help us. 



"I've got it John, why don't you pull out the maps and
figure out where we're heading." 



"Alright Mon.  Thanks."  He hops right back in the car
in the driver's seat and opens up the glove
compartment.  He begins searching through all the maps
that the rental car company gave us and lands his
finger on the small town of De Kalb.  Dana motions for
me to sit shotgun so I take her up on the offer, after
all she knows about our new relationship so there's no
point in hiding it.

 

I sit down and look over at John as he's looking for
traffic to clear so he can pull out "Do you know where
we're heading?"



"Sort of Mon, we need to take I-190 E to I-294 S."

 

"It sounds like you know where you're going to me."

 

"Yeah I've actually been out here before on a case,
but after I-294 its all a guessing game from there,
well that and the map of course."  He glances over and
winks at me and I can't help but laugh with that low
throaty sound, man do I want this guy really bad right
now.  It's too bad we're in a rental and Dana's in the
back seat, or we'd be having a lot more fun.  

 

He focuses on the road and I can see his jeans are
incredibly tight...why do my eyes wander at the most
inopportune times?  

 

He speaks out "Once we get onto 294 we'll need to look
for I-88.  Apparently the college is right off of
I-88.  Shouldn't be too hard from there."  

 

He catches my gaze where I perhaps shouldn't be
starring, and at first I don't realize if he gets it
or not.  Then it seems like a light switch has gone
off and he smirks over at me.  He whispers in a
not-so-hush tone, but just loud enough so Dana doesn't
hear "You like what you see Agent Reyes?"

 

"Of course I do," I tell him.  "I'd like to see more
Agent Doggett although I think this is probably not
the best time."

 

He laughs and so do I and I hear Dana saying something
in the backseat. 

 

"What's so funny you two?"

 

I glance over at John and he does the same to me.  We
both don't want to give our secret away, and we burst
out like children in a fit of giggles.  

 

Agent Scully seems to know what we're up to, or
something of the nature and she comments to our
laughter with "nevermind you two...I think I know more
than I would want to anyways." 

 

"John I think that's the highway you're looking for" I
point out and he nods in approval.  We pull onto the
toll-road, and John mumbles something about toll-roads
in Illinois and not getting reimbursed.  I glance back
at Dana and the two of us girls begin to laugh at him.
 Sometimes he's even cuter than I can remember.   

 

"What?" He pipes into our laughter and we can't help
but give him those adorable grins we're so good at.

I still refuse to answer his question, not that he
needs an answer, and it's more fun to tease than give
into him.  I turn on the radio and channel surf the
stations to find something upbeat.  I stop at 103.5 on
FM of course, and they identify themselves as KISS. 
John and I laugh at that, because we'd definitely
enjoy doing that right about now.  



Maybe I'm anticipating this too much but the drive
seems to take forever, and I'd really like to get to
the hotel for the night.  

 

Well that and lie in John's arms till the sunrises in
the morning.

 

 

We pull off the highway and take the last exit before
the toll-way onto Annie Glidden Road.  After driving
another mile or so we come across a hotel and pull
into the parking lot. 

 

"Wow, it's packed here.  Think there's something going
on this weekend John?" 



"I haven't heard anything, why don't you and Dana get
two rooms while I find a place to park."



"Alright, we'll meet you inside."

 

Dana and I step outside in the cool crisp air and walk
briskly into the corridor of the hotel. 

 

"Hi" I speak up to the gentleman behind the counter.

 

"Hello, I assume you two are looking for a room?"



"Yes two actually."



"Well you're in luck.  There are actually two rooms
left.  There's some big stuff going on this weekend at
the college, and all the local hotels are booked.  How
many people will be staying with you?"



"There will be three of us" I reply and he nods. I
hand him my bureau credit card and he runs it through
the system.

 

"That's a relief.  Apparently the bed in one of the
rooms is broken.  A new mattress was ordered last week
but apparently it never came in.  When you check out,
just ask to speak with the manager and I'm sure we can
get you a fine discount."



"Alright, thank you." I reply and he finishes with the
card and gives us the keys to our room.  



"Here, you'll want to place this on the inside of your
vehicle." He hands us a ticket for the dashboard and
we walk over to meet John as he's heading inside.  



"We need to get the luggage from the trunk" I respond
and John agrees and so we head back outside into the
cool air and pull the bags from the trunk.  Dana puts
the slip of paper in the front of the car and we walk
back inside through the side entrance.  

 

We walk inside and locate the two adjoining rooms on
the first floor, rooms 115 & 113.  I hand John his key
and he enters the room with only one decent bed, while
Dana and I chose to share the two twin beds. 

 

I lie my bag on my bed and walk over to Dana, "Will
you be alright if I go see John for a little while?"

 

"Of course I'll be fine.  Have fun."  She said it with
a smile on her face, and for once things seemed
relatively normal, well except for being in Illinois
and looking for Dana's kidnapped son.  All right maybe
normal isn't the best word I could have chosen, but
given the recent circumstances it'll do.  

 

I knock on the adjoining door and John opens it with a
grin on his face.  "Hey beautiful!" He exclaims.  I
guess he then noticed Dana in the background and he
tries to regain his composure and masculinity and
says, "you want to watch some TV?"

 

"Yes," and I enter his room and shut the adjoining
doors and lock it.  He turns on the TV to some racing
flick and believe me my mind is far from racing, or is
it?  I try to pull the remote from his hands, but I've
never really noticed his strength, and boy is he
strong.

 

I try to pull the remote from his grasp but he
wouldn't let me grab hold of it.  He sits on the edge
of the bed and places the remote behind him with his
two hands in back.  "Pick a hand Mon," he says and he
smiles a devious grin. 

 

"Two can play at that game" I retort and I move up on
and over his legs to straddle him so that I can reach
his hands behind his back.

 

"Hey no fair!  That's cheating!" 

 

"You started it John" I smirk and he catches my lips
in his mouth as I pounce him down upon the bed.  At
that very moment, the bed decides to give way and the
nails holding the bed together split the board in two.
 We fell into a loud heap on the bed that now rests on
the floor, with wood shooting upward and I give him
that devious grin he's been giving me "Now look what
you've done John".

 

"Look what I've done?  Who was the one that pounced
me?"



"Well if you wouldn't have broken the bed we wouldn't
be in this situation."  

 

We both laugh at the absurdity of it and hear a soft
wrapping knock at the adjoining door.  

 

"Just a minute" I reply and I stand up and unlock the
door.  Other than being red from laughter,
embarrassment, and arousal, I open the door to see
Dana facing me on the other side. 



"Are you two ok in there?"



"John sort of broke the good bed." I reply and Dana
peers over to see the bed lying on the floor.  John
comes up behind me and puts his arms around my stomach
and nuzzles himself in my hair.  



"Now where am I going to sleep Mon?" He asks me as he
starts nibbling my ear, and moving my hair behind my
neck.  

 

"You can sleep in bed with Monica.  I'm sure she won't
mind."  Dana offers.  



"Is that alright with you Mon?"  John asks and I turn
around to see those adorable puppy dog eyes and I kiss
him quickly on the lips.  



"So long as you don't try anything in my sleep" I wink
at him and he laughs in amusement.

 

"Yes please don't." Dana speaks up, and I could tell
she wasn't too thrilled with the situation.  



"I think I'm going to take a nice long hot shower
before I go to bed.  Would anyone else like to join
me?"



Dana laughed and speaks up "Please take it in your
bathroom, just about everything is broken in there now
anyways.  Let's leave this bathroom in tact, alright?"



"Sure thing, Mon?"  He gazes up at me and I give him
one of those smiles I save away for a rainy day.

 

"Yeah, I could use a shower."  I start to walk in the
other room and he tugs at my hand.

 

"In here Mon, remember?"

 

"Yeah, can't I grab my clothes though for afterwards?"
 

 

"I'd rather see you sleep nude Monica."



"Yeah, but I'm sure Dana wouldn't appreciate it much."



"Oh I could always cover you up" and he wraps his
entire body along my full length in a nice embrace to
show me how he'd 'cover me up'.  It's not such a bad
thing, but I think we're already in enough trouble
with the bed and all, I don't think I want to explain
why the sheets need to be replaced as well.  I laugh
and grin at the thoughts running through my head, and
pull my small nightie from my overnight bag.

 

I enter into the bathroom and John's already started
before me.  He's running the water and he's got the
shower curtain closed, but I can imagine him now, the
warm water running through his hair, the soapy film
coming off his muscular body.  

 

Wow it's hotter in here than when I came in, and I was
pretty hot.  



I pull off my clothes, one piece at a time, and John
responds with "Are you coming yet?"



I laugh at his words and reply, "You haven't touched
me yet."  



"Monica" and the way he says my name is so deep and
husky it drives me insane.  I have fully removed all
my clothes and I pull back the curtain to see John
glistening in the shower.  



I step in and can't help but look him up and down. 
He's certainly sexy, and now I can get the chance to
admire him as well.  I guess he notices my attention
has gone lower and he whispers into my ear "you want?"
and I nod my head in affirmation.  

 

I look up into his eyes and see desire and longing and
I pull his head towards mine and kiss him deeply. 
Tongues darting and twining a dance of love it truly
is.  I pull back to breath and he smiles up at me.  He
whispers into my ear "You're incredible Monica" and he
moves his mouth to my neck and begins kissing down my
body and stops upon my breasts.  He rubs his hand
around my right breast and begins to suck and slurp
upon my left nipple, he then switches so that he can
give me pleasure equally.  My back arches, as I want
him to take more into his mouth and he begins to move
down my body towards my navel.  

 

I stop him so that I get to touch and taste every inch
of his body and I begin my slow seduction down his
body until he thrusts once then twice towards me.  I
begin to rub him and take him into my mouth and he
shakes his head no.  He brings me up so that he can
kiss me once again and as his body thrusts towards
mine, his arm grazes across the soap bar, he loses his
balance, trips on the soap and falls out of the shower
stall *Smack* onto the tile floor.  

 

"Are you alright?" I ask him and there's clear
confusion in his eyes.  

 

"Yeah I think so, but boy did I make an ass out of
myself tonight.  Maybe the universe thinks we should
wait or something." 

 

And I can't help but laugh at his statement.



"John you sound like me, although I don't want to
wait.  I want you in me John."  He smiles and stands
up from the floor.  

 

He's standing up and it appears his ankle and elbow
might be bruised but he seems alright given the
circumstances.  

 

I turn off the shower since the water is running cold
and realize that tomorrow we might need real showers
since we still haven't used soap or shampoo yet.  I
step out of the tub and he embraces me once again and
I'm shocked because of his last statement about us
waiting.

 

He looks into my confused gaze and smiles up at me "I
didn't say anything about not kissing or sleeping
together, but maybe we should wait for sex."  John
laughs at his words.  "Do I sound crazy Mon?"



"Yeah but that's why I love you." I tell him and I
kiss him once again, tongues darting and exploring new
found territory. 

 

I want to make love with him, more than anything right
now, and I can tell he would like it to, but he's
right.  This isn't the place for it.  It'd be much
more enjoyable at home, once this case is solved, but
right now we need our sleep.  

 

John helps me dry off with a towel and I slip my
nightie on.  

 

"I'll meet you out there in a few minutes" he replies,
and I look down at his situation.  



"Would you like me to relieve that problem for you?" 
I start to move down his body and he stops me again. 
I thought all guys loved that, does John not?  Twice
now, and I've been turned down.  I'm not sure why it
bothers him because it sure as hell doesn't bother me.
 

 

"I'll be fine, just give me a minute.  Why don't you
go make sure Agent Scully is alright."  I don't know
what else to do or say so I stand back up and plop a
tiny kiss on his cheek. 



"Alright, come in when you're finished."  



I walk back in between the open adjoining doors and
see Dana sitting there. 

 

"I can't seem to sleep," she adds as I notice the
television is on.  I sit beside her as she's lying in
bed and I give her a hug. 

 

"It'll be alright," I tell her, and her eyes are
glistening again with tears. 

 

"I hope so," she says and she closes her eyes to drift
off into sleep.  

 

I gently lift myself from her bed, shut off the
television and plop onto my bed.  I think over the
past twenty-four hours and how everyone's lives have
changed.  How time is being stolen from all of us, one
way or another, and only if we live now, will we
rightfully have what's ours.  I close my eyes and
start to drift off into a light slumber, when I feel
John come up behind me, and slip into the twin-size
bed.  I lay motionless hurt from Dana's pain and my
own.  I wanted John tonight and maybe he's right this
isn't the time or place, but who's to say it will ever
be.  Sometimes we have to make the most of what we
have and go with it from there.  I drift off to sleep
with Johns arms wrapped around me, at least I have
this. 

 

I awaken to the feeling of John's hands wrapped around
my stomach tracing tiny circles carelessly.  At first
I wasn't even sure if he was awake, until I felt him
snuggle into me and trace my ear with his tongue.  I
turn my head back to the side to see what he was up to
and he gives me a devious grin.  He sweeps his arms
under me and before I knew it I'm pinned to the bed
with him right above me.  He's captured my hands down
onto the bed and is giving me this evil look again. 
He's descended upon my lips and I start to moan in
protest.  Of course he couldn't tell it was a moan of
protest and not of pleasure.  Hell I couldn't even
tell except that I know Dana is sleeping only a few
feet away, and I'd rather not wake her.  



"John we can't," I whisper out as a protest, and he
releases my arms.  He looks hurt but what else was I
suppose to do?  He gently adds one last kiss to my
lips and stands up from the bed.  

 

The sound of his movement awakens Dana, and she lies
in bed starring up at the ceiling.  I sit up in bed,
notice the clock reads 7:45 A.M. and I reach for my
robe on the chair beside the bed.  

 

"Girls, I'm going to take a shower.  I'll be out in a
little bit," and John goes into his hotel room and I
can hear him searching through his bag for his
clothes.

 

He steps back into the room and looks over at me
"Monica have you seen my pants?"

 

"No, why?"



"Because they're not in my bag and I'm sure I packed
them."

 

"Maybe they fell out or something."  I stand up, wrap
the robe around myself and walk into his room to help
him find his pants.  

 

As soon as I step in the room, he pulls my hand
towards the bathroom, so Dana can't see us.  He wraps
his arms around me, and tries to pull back my robe. 

 

"What have you done with John?" I ask him with a grin
on my face.  He smirks at me with one of those looks
like he's saying 'real funny' and I can't help but
giggle.  "I thought you needed help finding your
pants?" I retort to his smirk and his smile fades.

 

"I don't know where they are Mon," and he walks me
back over towards his bed and shows me his garment
bag.  "I know I packed it."



"So this wasn't just a decoy to get me in your room?"
I chime in and he laughs.  



"Nope, I'm innocent as can be," and I can't help but
crack up when he says that.  



"John Doggett innocent?  What world are you living
in?"

 

"This one, and I'm enjoying it very much, thank you." 


 

By now he's pulled out all his clothes, and it seems
as though he forgot his work pants.  



"Why don't you just wear yesterday's clothes?"

 

"Those don't match my top."



"Now you're sounding like a girl" and he pushes me to
the wall, with my back flat against it and his hands
up by my head. 

 

"You're enjoying this aren't you?" He asks sternly and
then he probes my mouth with his tongue.  Seething an
answer to his question. 

 

I gasp for air and his hands are still posed to the
wall, holding my arms down in restraint.  



"What?" I ask him.

 

"Making me angry." He states and I avert my gaze to
the floor.  What happened since last night? 

 

"When did you become such a beast?" Once the words
leave my mouth I can't believe I've said them.  His
eyes grow wide, and he looks at me accusingly. 

 

"Me the beast?  I don't think so."   Then he drops my
arms.  He walks over towards the bathroom, steps in
and shuts the door.  I begin to hear the shower
running in there and I mumble to myself "what the
hell?"  



I walk over to the bathroom to find the door locked
and I pound on it fiercely so he knows I'm there and
he's listening.  

 

"Don't fall John, wouldn't want you to hurt anything."
 I don't know what's gotten over me.  A few minutes
ago things were fine between us, and now this whole
charade.

 

I walk briskly back into our room and see Dana sorting
through her clothes trying to decide what to wear.  



"What was that all about?" She asks me with one of
those raised eyebrow looks. 

 

"John, he's acting like an animal," and Dana laughs at
my words.  

 

"Well at least he's your animal," she states and I
smile at that.  She's right, he is my animal.  

 

I pull my clothes from my suitcase and Dana comes over
to me. 



"What's wrong?" she asks.  She sits on the bed beside
my bag and looks up at me until I answer her.

 

"Dana, I don't know.  I mean I want him and all, but
he seems so primal right now and everything.  He's
just not acting like himself I guess, and there was
something else.  I don't know if I should even be
telling you" she looks hurt that I'd even consider
keeping something from her.

 

"You can tell me anything Monica, you know that." She
tells me and I move the bag onto the floor so I can
take a seat next to her.  She places her hand on mine,
and I smile up at her with a look of gratitude.

 

"Last night." I pause contemplating how much I should
tell her, after all she knows most of it anyways I'm
sure.  "In the bathroom, when John and I were in
there, well..." I normally don't have trouble telling
people things but I guess I've never really confided
to Dana about my sex life, or lack there of. 

 

"Well?" She questions and I continue on.

 

"We were having fun in the shower, and I was going to
go down on John and he seemed upset by it.  I've never
known a man to look upset by that Dana."

 

"Monica I'm sure there's nothing to worry about. 
Maybe he just wasn't ready for you two to become
involved intimately yet."



"I thought about that, but he was about to" I paused
again thinking back to last night, and trying to chose
words that were appropriate for the situation "thrust
into me, and so I don't think that was it Dana."  She
looks like she's thinking what I've said over and
trying to come up with a reasonable solution to the
situation or the problem. 

 

"Monica maybe it's not what you think.  Why not ask
John?  I mean after all he did throw himself at you
this morning."  Dana laughs at the thought and I laugh
as well.  Apparently she heard more than I
anticipated.  



"Thanks" I tell her and stand up and grab my clothes
from the bed.  "Do you mind if I shower first?" I ask
her and she laughs.  

 

"Only if you don't want to shower with John.  Although
I think you'd have more fun in the other one" and we
both laugh.  



"Well I'd need to get into there, because he locked
the door.  I really don't want to have to pay for that
crappy room if I knocked down the door."  Dana stands
up and pulls a hanger from the closet.  She contorts
the metal so that the straight end will fit into the
keyhole.  

 

"Try this," she says as she hands me the tool.  I
laugh at the thought and the realization of what I've
told Dana, and step into the other bedroom.  



I put the straight edge of the hanger into the door
and as I hear it click, the door opens in front of me.
 Apparently John is done his shower, go figure.  "I
guess you're done" I speak up and he laughs a deep
throat laugh.  "Yeah, trying to spy on me Monica?"

 

"Who me?" I give him one of those angelic looks, like
I'm innocent, and he nudges me out of the way.  

 

I notice he's only wearing a towel, and I guess he's
caught my gaze because he speaks up "Were you thinking
of stealing it?" He asks and I can't lie to him.  Not
when he's looking so incredibly sexy and I want
nothing more than to lie back down and make love to
him for hours.  

 

"Yeah, only for a glimpse of dessert" I reply and he's
laughing again.  I know this isn't the time but I need
to know why he wouldn't let me pleasure him in the
shower.

 

"John?" I say

 

"What Monica?"



"What happened last night?  I mean in the shower?"



"Last I recall you pushed me out!"

 

"I did not," and I can tell he doesn't really believe
that because he's laughing with those words.  

 

"I slipped and fell, you know that," he replies and he
averts his gaze like he's avoiding something.

 

"That's not what I'm talking about John" I say matter
of factly.

 

"I just don't want you to do anything you don't want
to, is that so bad?" He asks me and I can feel tears
burning in my eyes.

 

"Why would you think that John?  Why would I do
anything that I don't want to?"



"I don't know, because I forced you to."

 

"John, you didn't force me to do anything in there,
hey wait a sec, then what's with this morning?"



"Oh that, yeah" and he walks over and pulls his shirt
from yesterday on. 

 

"So?" I inquire and he looks at me.

 

"I don't know I wanted a change."



"A change? John is there something you'd like to clue
me in on?"

 

"Yesterday, everything we seemed to do didn't fit
right.  I mean the airplane, then the bed, then and
the shower.  I figured maybe if we swooped this thing
in the ass it'd work right."



I laughed at his theory.  It was crazy but he has his
reasons.  



"So now what?" I ask him and I pull him into an
embrace with my hands around his head and he's got his
hands on my waist, drawing tiny circles.  



"We take one step at a time.  Let's not rush things. 
I mean I want to have sex with you and all; I just
don't want it to end up in a motel room for our first
time.  I guess I'm a romantic."  I rest his forehead
against my own.

 

"John, just being with you makes me happy.  I'm not
looking for perfection." 

 

"I know Mon, humor me will ya?"



"Hey you're the one sleeping in my bed and trying to
seduce me."



"I would never" and Johns face grows into a big smirk
and I punch him in the shoulder rather lightly.

 

"Right.  So what are you going to do about those
pants?"  I ask him, and he laughs.

 

"Well I'll wear these today and there's always laundry
or shopping" he remarks.

 

"Shopping?  I'm sure we could get you something sexy
to put on." I add and he laughs.

 

"I'd rather go shopping for you, say the lingerie
aisle.  See you try some things on," and he winks
after his statement.  I laugh a deep throaty laugh,
and I want to kiss him.  However now I'm not sure what
he wants, what he needs.  Does he want time?  

 

Or does he just want to wait till we get home so it'll
be nice & sweet?  I'm not sure I want nice & sweet
right now.  I think his animal primitive urges have
officially gotten to me.  ROAR.

 

I pull back from John's arms and speak up "I should
let you finish getting changed, I need to step
outside."  I have the sudden urge to smoke again, and
I thought I finally called it quit.  The real reason I
started to smoke was because of John.  It happened
after his son died.  I needed something, some sort of
fix, and once I inhaled one breath I was addicted. 
It's better than drugs or alcohol, but I'd rather not
smoke. 

 

I always thought it was a terrible habit for people to
have, until I picked it up.  Then you could say it
didn't bother me so much anymore.  What bothered me
was what you thought, John.  Yeah I know I shouldn't
care what other people think, but you'd get annoyed
every time I'd light up and that's the reason I quit,
for you.  I could never tell you that.  Not in a
thousand years, although I suppose it makes some
sense.  You're practically the reason I started and
you're the same reason I quit.  

 

It's kind of ironic I suppose, although there's
nothing much to do about it.  I'm just glad I keep a
spare pair of lights in my bag for a rainy day, and
this day sure is gloomy.  



I shouldn't be sad but the recent effects lately.  In
fact I'm happier than I've ever been.  I have John's
full attention, well other than this case.  Which I
might add brings gloom to my life.  All right so my
life isn't picture perfect but whose is?

 

I retrieve the lights, my lighter, and my key to get
back into the room and head outside for a breath of
fresh air.  I turn back around to make sure no one is
following me because I don't really want John on my
ass for smoking.  He'd probably mention it to Dana who
would give me a nice long lecture about my health. 
All right, I admit it I'm a bit cranky, but why
shouldn't I be?  I mean after all, the guy I love, yes
I admit it I love him, is well he's playing hard to
get.  I'm not sure if that's what he's doing or what,
but I sure as hell don't understand him, and I have to
work with him, which I knew would be hard enough, but
I figured what the hell I can handle it.  



I light my cigarette and put it to my lips, I inhale
the nice flavor of nicotine and boy does that feel
better.  I guess I've been craving one of these for a
while and well now that I'm all emotional and
vulnerable, I guess I'm not tough enough to avoid
those cravings.  Oh well.  

 

I inhale another breath of the Morley and I feel arms
wrap around my waste from behind.  I'm about to
protest but I know who it is, and I feel like a
teenager caught in the act.  I turn around to face him
and he takes the cigarette from my lips and stomps it
out on the ground.  I avert my gaze because I'm not
really in the mood to talk with him, I feel like he's
pushing our relationship away.  Maybe he's afraid of
commitment.  I don't know, but I'm tired of being hurt
all the time.

 

"Monica, you wanna talk?"  He asks in a bit of a stern
manner, and he places his finger under my chin so that
I look him in the eyes.  

 

"You made yourself pretty clear in there, and if you
don't mind I wanted to be alone."  Maybe that's the
last thing I really wanted, but I also didn't want him
to feel obligated to be with me here.  I never know
with John, if he's acting out of his heart or out of
friendship.  Shouldn't they be one in the same?  

 

"Monica, don't do this to me.  You're my best friend
you know that.  Tell me what's wrong."  He wraps his
arms around my waist and pulls me towards him.  I rest
my head upon his shoulder and my tears begin to fall. 
I don't want to cry, not outside, not with him right
here seeing me fall apart.  It shouldn't matter, but
it does.  It matters to me.  



"How can you not know what's wrong" I speak up with
teary eyes and I'm trying to hold back, really I am
but I can't.  

 

"Tell me Mon," He states and he kisses my cheek. 
There he goes again, being my friend.  Maybe that's
what I need more than him as a lover, but a friend. 
Although I thought that's what we had and we were
moving on to something more.      

 

"I don't know John.  I mean everything seemed fine
last night, and then in the shower you seemed
different, but this morning everything was back to how
it was yesterday evening.  I'm not sure where our
relationship is even heading right now.  To be honest
I don't even know if you want to be in it.  You seem
like your whole romantic thing is an excuse to avoid
intimacy, to avoid 'us'."  He seems like he's been
struck in the heart.  Had his heart torn out, and
maybe I just have.  I don't want to tear him to pieces
because I love him, but maybe I need to know he feels
the same way.  I don't want to have to keep on
guessing.  

 

"Wow" He states after a few seconds of silence. "It's
not you Monica, we've been friends forever, and I've
just recently realized how much your friendship means
to me in more than just an emotional level but also a
physical level as well.  I don't want you to do
anything you're uncomfortable with."  He pauses and
catches my averted gaze.  Once again he takes his
finger to lift my chin.  "I love you Monica, I want to
spend the rest of my life with you," and his mouth
descends upon my own.  I open my lips to him and he
explores with more fervor than before.  

 

"I love you too John, but sometimes you seem distant,
like your hiding something."



"Who's the one who came outside to smoke?" I laugh
when he says that.

 

"You know me too well don't you?" I respond and he
nods.

 

"Although Monica I don't see why you smoke.  It's a
filthy habit." I laugh when he says that.  He's right
and he knows I feel that way too.  I think he also
understands why I crave the occasional breath of a
Morley.  Sometimes it's a way to relax my nerves when
there's nothing else to turn to, and I am emotionally
stressed.  Although now that shouldn't be the case, I
have John.

 

We walk back inside and Dana has finished her shower,
and she's on her cell phone to the local authorities. 
When she hangs up she walks over to John and myself
who are sitting on my bed and she sits across from us
on her own.  



"That was the NIU campus police.  They're giving us
jurisdiction over the matter and in twenty minutes we
meet them at their campus department and we'll be
given keys and identification so we can get in."



"Dana I don't understand" I tell her and she nods.



"I also got off the phone with Skinner and he thinks
it would be best if we went undercover on our
investigation until we have any solid evidence that
Shelita is involved, and will link her to the
kidnapping.  We don't want to risk her running.  So he
thinks that our best shot is infiltrating the group."

 

"And what are your thoughts on the matter?" I look up
at Dana and she's averting her gaze.  She doesn't want
to personalize with this case but it's beyond that. 
Its her sons life at risk and personally I don't think
she should be on it, but if it was my son I'd probably
want to be involved too.

 

"It doesn't matter." Dana states and I stand up from
my bed and sit beside Dana, I rest my hand upon hers
and give her a hug.

 

"It does matter, and we'll find your son, alive and
safe.  Don't worry.  Dana, I'm not sure you're the
best person to go undercover though."  She's fighting
back tears and I can't blame her, I'd be crying too if
my son were missing.  

 

"I know, A.D. Skinner said the same thing.  He wants
you to go undercover Monica and he wants John to be
with you all the time, like a boyfriend I suppose. 
Skinner doesn't want to take any precautions and
figures that if you have backup you two can handle
most instances."

 

I inwardly smile at the idea of John and myself in a
dorm room, alone.  Then the idea creeps upon me, what
if Dana told Skinner of our new relationship, would
she?

 

"Dana, you didn't mention anything to A.D. Skinner
about 'us'?" I ask her while motioning with my hands
of John and myself.

 

"No, of course not, but please don't forget why you're
there you guys.  You're the only people I have left to
trust."

 

"We won't.  What did Skinner want you to do while
we're undercover?"  



"He wanted me to speak with the other undercover
agents from the Chicago Field Office.  They'll be
driving in sometime later today."



John speaks up "Skinner told me to do that."



"Well" she pauses for a moment choosing her words
wisely "He assumed you'd be busy with Agent Reyes this
afternoon."

 

"Alright" John replies and we stand up and grab our
coats and keys and head for the car.  



"Mon, did you think Dana is really gonna do what
Skinner asked her to?  I mean I think she's going to
get involved in something she shouldn't.  After all,
he did tell me to do that, you think I should call
him?"

 

"John you worry to much.  Dana needs some time alone,
I'm sure that's all it is.  My best suggestion would
honestly be to let her interview the agents from
Chicago, after all it'll keep her occupied."  I tell
him.

 

"Unless they tell her something she doesn't want to
hear." He responds and gives me a look like I'm right
and you know it.  

 

"What's she gonna do to them John, shoot em?" I ask
him and he laughs.

 

"You never know with Dana.  You never know." He
repeats the last line as if to himself, and I step
over to the car and he laughs.

 

"It's not that far a walk Mon.  I think it'd be better
to walk it anyhow, at least for now.  Otherwise we
might look like a couple of FBI agents"

 

"Oh and like that outfit doesn't make you look like
one?" I remark and he smirks at me.



"Yeah you're right.  We should find some clothes
around town."



"What do you mean we John?  I'm already trendy, you on
the other hand..." and he begins laughing. 

 

"Yeah Mon.  Come on, let's go meet the campus police
to get our information for classes" and he grins at me
"while I get to watch you go to school and be your
boyfriend."

 

"Damn your lucky.  You get me as your girl." I retort
and punch him jokingly in the arm.  

 

"Yeah I must be the luckiest man alive." He says and
pulls me into his arms for a nice, long breathless
kiss.  What can I say; he always leaves me that way.  

 

"Mon?" 

 

"Yeah?" 

 

"I can still taste that cigarette you had earlier....
gross" and I laugh at the thought.  "Stop laughing
Mon, you really shouldn't smoke." He retorts and I
grab hold of his hand like a teenager in love.

 

"I wouldn't have smoked if you wouldn't have been so
primal earlier and left me so unsatisfied" and I laugh
at the memory of earlier flooding back to me.

 

"Unsatisfied eh?" He looks up at me.  "Then we'll just
have to do something about that later," he says and he
gives me one of those sexy as hell grins.


When we arrived at the campus police department John
and I let go of one another's hands because we weren't
exactly undercover yet.  As soon as I pulled my hand
away from his, I felt an emptiness in my heart and I
looked up at John and his eyes showed the same longing
that I was experiencing.  

 

We entered the campus police station and asked for the
director in charge Mr. Luctar.  The director had a
striking resemblance to Sir Anthony Hopkins, which I
might add is frightening because of that movie he was
in a few years back.  

 

Always gave me the chills when I watched it back in
college, and here I am again.  After signing a few
forms and receiving the key and identification to the
dorms, John and I were on our way to the dorms.  

 

Once we left the campus police department I placed my
student id card the officers gave me in a holder that
they had supplied me with as well as that was labeled
with the NIU logo on it.  I also attached my dorm key
to the key chain and John swapped it right from me.



"Give it back," I demand and he only laughs at my
plead of insistence for it.  He opens it up and
examines the picture they used on it for
identification.  



"Nice pic Mon," he teases and I swat him for his words
and for stealing my key chain.

 

"Yours wouldn't be much better either if you were the
student" I tell him "but I don't think you'd pass
given your age."



"Ouch, that's below the belt Mon" and he bolts over
like he's been hit below the belt.   

 

"Anytime John, anytime" and I swipe my key chain back
from him when he's doubled over and laughing.   "Come
on" I tell him and I take his hand once again since
we're playing the role of boyfriend and girlfriend.  

 

We enter the lobby of Grant Towers South and wait for
the elevator.  Once it finally reaches the lobby, I
key in floor eight and we ride on up until the doors
open.  

 

"We're here," I mention and I take his hand and pull
him with me, so he doesn't fall to far behind.  "We're
looking for room 817" I say and we count down the
numbers until we're at the far end of the hall.  

 

"This must be it" John remarks and I put the key in
and turn.  We enter the room and the bureau was right.
 They arranged for separate beds and furnished the
room to avoid any suspicions.  There was a television
on one of the desks in the corner and a computer on
the opposite desk. 



"We were told we'll have complete internet access and
that we can log onto the FBI database if necessary." I
remark, and John nods in understanding.      

 

"What room is Shelita staying in here?" 

 

"She's in 823" I remark and we open our door and peer
out into the hallway to notice where her room is
located.  

 

"You'll have to stop by sometime today and say hi to
her or something.  Whatever girls do."  John said and
I laugh at his words.  

 

"You think she's just gonna open right up and show me
to William?" I ask John.

 

"No, but at least you have an excuse to walk over
there right now.  Plus you need to join their clique
of friends." 

 

"What fun" I say and he smiles over at me

 

"It won't be so bad.  You'll find out what you need
to, maybe you'll even be lucky and see William around.
 It'd make things a lot simpler."  

 

"Yes, yes it certainly would." I remark.  "Do you
think we should call Dana and make sure things are
going smoothly from her end of it?"

 

"I don't see the harm in it." He replies so I shut the
door, sit down on the bed, and pull out my cell. 
After dialing her number I wait for her answering
machine to pick up "Dana its Monica, call me when you
can.  I wanted to catch up on old times you know how
to reach me," and I hang up.

 

"So no answer?  I'm sure she's alright."  John says
and sits beside me and puts his hand on my shoulder.  



His gaze was stuck upon my lips and he lean in for a
kiss when a visitor interrupts us and is knocking on
the door.  "Come in" I shout and the door opens with a
young girl standing outside. 



"Hi, I'm Julianne.  I'm the CA on the floor.  You must
be Elizabeth."  I stand up to introduce myself and
notice that this woman is a bit shorter than myself
but taller than Dana.  She's got strawberry blonde
hair, which matches her freckles, and she's a little
tyke.  I'm surprised she's even old enough to be in
college.  

 

"Yeah actually I go by Bethie for short" I tell her.

 

"Good to know, and I take it this is your boyfriend?"
She points to John.  

 

"Yepp, he's mine, sorry you can't have him," and
Julianne laughs.  "Alright, just don't get into too
much trouble you too." She adds "and it was nice
meeting you Bethie.  If you need anything please don't
hesitate to stop by." She adds and shuts the door on
her way out.

 

I lay down on the bed with my feet hanging off at an
angle and John sits down in the middle of the bed I'm
on.  He leans down to me and moves my hair so he can
nibble on my flesh.  "We need you to look like a
college girl," he remarks in between nibbles and
gentle sucking.  "If you don't have hickey's no one's
going to believe that we're involved."  I want to swat
him for that, but I can't respond.  He's made me
completely speechless and I want more from him, I need
more.  I know he's doing this to tease me, what else
is new, but right now I don't really mind.  He lays
himself above me and moves his hand to my stomach to
trail my shirt up where he's drawing tiny circles on
my ribcage.  He moves his hand to my back to unclasp
my bra and I scoot off the bed mere inches to allow
him access.  Once he unclasps my bra I can feel his
feather light touch sending a burning sensation within
me.  He moves his lips to my stomach when my cell
phone rings.

 

I reach over to the side for my cell "Monica?"



"Monica its Dana, you called?"



"Yeah" I pause to take a breath because I'm still
highly aroused from John's touch 



"Did I call at a bad time?"  I consider for the
briefest of a moment saying yes, but I can't.  We're
on bureau time, we should be investigating William's
disappearance, although it is college life, and so
we're just wasting our sleeping time.  Plus we're
gonna be busy tonight trying to meet Shelita.

 

"Nope, just getting ready to meet Shelita a little
later, that's all."  John gives me the look like I
should have said to Dana yeah it's a bad time, I'm in
the middle of foreplay.  "Dana, is everything alright
with you?"  



"Yeah, just trying to keep it together.  Skinner
suggested that maybe I should fly home, but I can't
Monica.  I need to know that William is alright."



"I know Dana, we're looking into it." I promise her.



"I should let you go.  Let me know if you turn
anything up." Dana remarks.



"Will do," and I hang up the cell.

 

"Now where were we?" John says as he leans in towards
my stomach with his mouth, and I push him away.  



"We're on bureau time John, later alright.  Plus it
gives us something to look forward to," and John
laughs.  

 

"I could always give you something to look forward
to," he says with that sexy smirk on his face.  

 

I stand up and fasten my bra, pull on my shoes and
John takes the cue and puts his back on too.  



"Maybe we should get you another outfit before
tonight, you can't wear that"

 

"Yeah" he says and grabs my keys from the desk.

 

"Come on lets go out and see what there is around
town." 

 

We lock the door, and walk towards the end of the
hallway.  Passing us in the hallway was a woman that
caught my attention.  

She looked familiar to the photo I saw yesterday at
the Lone Gunmen's place, and her eyes were incredibly
intriguing.  I tried not to stare, and John didn't
even notice her at all.  Maybe that's good that he's
not checking out any other woman, but then again he
should be on the look out for our case.

 

When we approach the elevator I embrace him and
whisper into his ear "that was her". 

 

He looks at me questionably "Are you sure Mon?"

 

"Of course I'm sure," I tell him and my cell phone
startles us both.  

 

"Bethie" I answer it, since I'm in the hallway and I
know anyone may be listening.

 

"Agent Reyes, I've been trying to contact you and
Agent Doggett all morning."  Says A.D. Skinner.  



"Sorry I've been rather busy unpacking at the dorms"

 

"That's what I wanted to contact you about Agent
Reyes.  The bureau has been nice enough to lend you
both some clothes and what not in the room.  I'm sure
you'll find it suitable for however long you both will
be staying there."

 

"Thank you" I reply and I hang up the cell.  



"Come on" I tell John and I grab his hand and walk him
with me back to our dorm room.  When we reach 817 and
step inside 

 

I walk over to the drawers in the closet and sure
enough there are a few outfits "they'll do" I state
and he nods in agreement.  

 

"Why don't you get changed into something more fitting
for the occasion, while I stop by and introduce myself
to our mystery woman."

 

"Alright" John says and I step outside and go looking
for room 823 and I listen at the door a moment before
I knock.  I have my gun at my hip under my light
jacket and it's not visible but I can definitely reach
it if necessary.

 

There doesn't seem to be any sounds audible from
outside the door, specifically no crying babies.  I
knock on the door and wait a moment for a young woman
to open the door a half a foot and peer her head out.

 

"Hi I'm Bethie" and I put out my hand to shake her's.

 

"Hi Bethie, I'm Alyson" and she opens the door all the
way "and this is my roommate Michelle."  She points to
Michelle and I enter in and shake hands with the girl
I've seen in surveillance photos.  



"You guys have a really cool room," I point out to the
tube lights and pictures decorated on the walls." 

 

"Thanks" they both chime in and so I walk over towards
Michelle.  I figure I can get a background of some
events without their knowledge of my involvement.     




"Neat contacts" I point out and she laughs.

 

"Thanks.  So are you new to the school or just are
floor?" She asks me.

 

"Oh yeah I'm new to NIU.  I was supposed to start last
semester but they lost the paperwork.  Go figure. 
Nice thing is spring is just around the corner."



"So I take it your not from around here?"  Alyson
says.

 

"Yeah actually I grew up in Mexico and have been
moving around ever since."



"That's cool," she states and then both girls look at
one another and then to me.  Alyson pipes up "You look
21" she states and I nod.  "Would you do us a favor?
We're having a party tonight, since its Friday and
all, and we don't have too many contacts that are the
legal drinking age." 



I laugh and tell them "I'll see what I can do."



"We'll pay you for your trouble" Michelle blurts out
and I know that this is my only option for getting in
with their group and their involvement.  I know it's
not exactly a perfect plan when it comes to things,
but maybe if they're even a little tipsy they'll spill
the beans on their plans and with William.  

 

"Alright" I state and the girls write out a short list
and hand me their money when they've completed it.  



"Thanks" Alyson says and smiles a look of genuine
gratitude.  



"Yeah no problem" I say and smile back and she
whispers something to Michelle.  

 

Michelle nods in agreement, and then says aloud
"you're certainly invited to come hang out with us
tonight.  We're going to be partying with some of the
others on the floor.  It would give you a chance to
meet some new faces."

 

"Sounds good." I say and I open the door and walk back
to my dorm room.  

 

"John could you do me a favor?"



"Sure Mon"



"Could you pick up these things at the store?" I say
and then I go over and lie down on the bed.  "I think
we're gonna be up late tonight and I'd like some rest
for now."



"Alright."  I shut my eyes and I can hear him
unfolding the loose-leaf paper.  "What kind of list is
this?" 

 

"Michelle and her roommate Alyson are having a party
tonight and needed some things.  I've been invited, so
it would be wise of you to pick up everything on the
list."  I dig in my pocket to pull out the cash the
girls gave me, "here" I state and hand the money to
him.  



"Mon, do you realize that you could get in trouble for
this?"



I open my eyes and look up at him standing and
starring down at me, "yes but what other option do we
have?"



"Fine" and John sighs, "but I'm going with you tonight
to the party."

 

"Figured as much" I state and shut my eyes.  I hear
John grab my keys, the door shut and I fall into a
soundless slumber.          

  

Sometimes we fall in love.  Other times we miss a
chance of it because we brush it past us, like
tomorrow will always be and we have the rest of our
lives before us.  Well, sometimes that is the case. 
Then there are those other times.  The times that
we've fallen in love with what we want and not what we
have.  Those are the most painful of times, coming to
the realization of what exists and what we want to
have existed.  I've been there before; especially with
Brad and that is the one thing I don't want to happen
between John and myself.  

 

Dreams are just that, dreams.  An existence of
something we wish for yet without them our lives would
be less appealing.  Do dreams shape us into who we
are?  Or do our actions shape our dreams into what
they've become?  

 

I hear the door unlock, and I turn to open my eyes at
the light invading my sleep.  I squint to avoid the
pain of brightness but it's too late for that and I
pull the blanket over my head to rest for a few more
minutes.



John lets himself in, shuts the door and puts the
brown paper bag of liquor in the fridge.  I feel the
bed sink down from John's presence and I roll towards
him still shielded from the light.  My face is no
longer under the blanket but my head is in towards the
bed and the sheets are blocking the rays of light from
my eyes.

 

"Hey sunshine" John says and he moves the hair out of
my eyes.  He bends down and plants a kiss on my cheek.
 "You ready to go out for some food?  We don't want
you to be a lightweight tonight" and he laughs at the
thought of me tipsy.

 

"I could out drink you anytime John, just name the
time and place." I state half asleep and he laughs
again.  I turn towards him, sit up and crack my neck
from the tension of my nap.  I feel rather rested
given the circumstances but I know I'm in for another
late night.  

 

John winces when my neck cracks from side to side and
I smile up at him.  Oh how lucky am I to have this man
in my bed?  

 

What I wouldn't give to live this way back home, a
nice, carefree life with John.  I smile up at him and
he looks confused.

 

"Did I miss something Mon?" 

 

"No more than the usual" I state and he smiles back at
me 

 

"Alright then, lets get you dressed in something sexy
for tonight."  We both stand up and sort through the
clothes I've been loaned by the bureau.  I laugh, and
pick up something black, short and skimpy.  "I'm
surprised these came from our department, are you
gonna wear this?" He eyes me suggestively and glances
back at the tiny outfit, would you even call it that? 
  



"You should have seen the outfits in my closet when I
was back at college.  I'm surprised they even accepted
me into the bureau."

 

"Really?  I'd definitely like to see those clothes
sometime" and I shake my head no.

 

"Not in a thousand years John, not in a thousand
years" and I giggle at the thought of him even
thinking about seeing me in them.  If only he knew. 
If only he knew.

 

"You can see me in whatever you like?" He offers and I
laugh and gently punch him on the shoulder.

 

I whisper into his ear "How about nothing John?"  

 

He smiles and looks down at me "Sure just name the
time and place."

 

I pulled through a few more outfits "This is the one I
think I'll wear" I say and he glances over at it.  



"It's definitely short."  He says and he swallows long
and hard.  "It's really cute."  He adds.  The dress is
black and very tight, rather short and suggestive, and
the front is very low cut and revealing.  I change in
front of him and he's definitely enjoying the show. 
Once I get the dress on I walk over to the door and
look in the full-length mirror.  



"This will definitely do," I say and he smiles up at
me.

 

"You look beautiful Monica."

 

"Thank you John.  Now lets get you changed into
something for tonight, and while we're at it why don't
we figure out a cover story for how we met."



"You don't think we should tell them that my son was
kidnapped and you work for the FBI?"



"I think that would definitely blow our cover."



"Yeah, why don't you come up with it, you're the
creative type Mon."

 

"The creative type?"



"Yeah you know, you're the one who always thinks it's
something else, paranormal or whatever.  Gotta be
creative to come up with some of your theories."  I
swat him for that one and he looks hurt.  "I'm not
trying to be mean, I just think you're better at that
then I am."

 

"Sure" I say sarcastically and he shakes his head.  He
pulls out something to wear from his closet and shows
it to me.

 

"Will this work?"



"Yeah just don't wear those pants," I say and he
laughs and looks down at how hideous the two would be
and crinkles his brow.  

 

"Don't worry, I won't.  Why don't we grab a bite to
eat before the party?"

 

"Alright" I tell him and we head out to dinner.

 

"John do you even know of a place to eat around here?"
I ask him on our way down the elevator.  



"Yeah, when I went out to the liquor store earlier I
passed a few restaurants.  We'll have to take the car
though" and I give him a questioningly look and his
response is "Dana knows, she's coming with us to
dinner, and then we'll walk to the party from the
hotel."

 

"Sounds like a plan" I say and he smiles up at me and
take my hand in his.  

 

We step outside and it's a bit chilly for the outfit
I've got on.  John notices me freezing and removes his
trench coat "Here 

Mon." He states and places the jacket over my
shoulders.

 

"Are you sure?"



"Of course I'm sure, it's a decent walk to the hotel."


 

"Thank you John," I say and wrap my arms around him as
we're walking to the hotel to get Dana for dinner.  

 

When we arrive at the door to Dana's room it's open
and we both eye it warily, concerned for her well
being.  

 

"Dana?" I call out.

 

"Come in you two."  We hear Dana shout and John
motions for me to enter first and he steps in behind
me.  He still has arm around my waist and we enter the
hotel room to see A.D. Skinner sitting on the bed.



"Agents" Skinner says and John immediately drops his
arm from my waist and steps to my side.  I want to cry
out from the loss of contact but I can't, not with our
assistant director in the room.

 

I try to gain some composure; at least we weren't
caught in the act and speak up "Sir, what are you
doing here?"  

 

"Trying to solve this case.  Can I ask why you're
dressed like that Agent Reyes?"

 

"You told us to go undercover sir," I state and he
shakes his head no like he's confused.

 

"I didn't tell you to become a prostitute Agent.  At
least have the decency to put on some clothes for
dinner."  



"Sir with all do respect I'm going to a party tonight,
undercover and I was invited by Shelita."



Skinner eyes me warily and he nods his head in
understanding.  "Alright, have you learned anything
new yet?"



"Not yet sir, but Shelita's given name is Michelle so
perhaps we can do some more background work."



"Agent Doggett why don't you get hold of the
background information on this Michelle person."

 

"I would sir but I'm backing up Agent Reyes at this
party."

 

A.D. Skinner turns a shade of red I'm sure of never
seen before on him and states rather abruptly "I'm not
sure what the two of you have going on there tonight,
but you're on a case."



"We know that sir," I state.  "We don't have anything
planned except to infiltrate the Star 4 group, and
from our sources they are having a party tonight."



"What sources?"  Skinner demands, and I look at John
to see if I should tell our assistant director
everything, or only part of the story.

 

"Michelle and her roommate invited me, since I'm new,
and I was just bringing Agent Doggett along."  I could
tell the use of his last name stung him cold like a
slap in the face.  I couldn't very well say I was
bringing John along as my boyfriend.  

 

"You two better behave yourselves." Skinner looks
pissed and eyes John, "I'm not sure why you feel the
need to have your hands all over her Agent Doggett
since you're not on assignment during the evening."



"Sorry sir" Agent Doggett states to the Assistant
Director.

 

"Don't apologize to me, apologize to your partner. 
She could have you on charges for sexual harassment."

 

John turns to me with the most frightened eyes and
says, "I'm sorry Mon..."



"Ahem..." Skinner interrupts.

 

"Agent Reyes." John concludes.

 

"It's alright." I say and smile a brief second at him
so he knows not to worry so much.

 

"Agent Reyes" Skinner interrupts my smile and his
voice is on edge "Stop leading your fellow Agent on. 
He's on a job and doesn't need to be on you!"

 

"With all do respect sir," and I look towards John. 
He's sulking and he sees what I'm about to do and
shakes his head no.  I nod my head yes and continue
onward.   "John and myself our involved and if that's
a problem I'll transfer but you and I both know we're
the best two agents for the job tonight.  No one else
could have gotten invited to the party and we did.  If
you have an issue, you can have my badge and gun, but
think about what you're doing to Agent Scully sir." I
state and I look at Agent Scully who's stepped out of
the bathroom, changed and ready to go.

 

"Did I interrupt something?" Scully asks and notices
the A.D. is bright red with anger.  "I think I'm just
gonna head right on back where I came from," and Dana
starts to head back towards the bathroom when Skinner
stops her. 



"Did you know what they were up to Agent Scully?"



Dana looks over towards John and myself and I nod yes
and John nods no.  We really do make a great team. 
I'd laugh right now if we weren't in such a shit load
of trouble.    

 

"Sir to be honest how could they not.  I mean with
everything they've been through and hell look at the
bed that broke." 

 

Skinner's eyes go wide and a vein starts to bulge out
on his forehead.  John looks really worried right now
and I'm trying to hold in my laughter.  Poor Dana
she's trying to stand up for us but I think she's
realized she's said a lot more than she should have.

 

"The bed broke Agents?" Skinner demands and I
interrupt John before he can speak.  



"One of the beds in that bedroom" and I point to the
adjoining doors "was broken when we got here.  The
other one broke when John put his bag on the bed and
sat down.  There weren't any other hotel rooms so he
had to sleep in our room last night."  



"That is strictly prohibited by FBI guidelines."



"Yes, we know sir but should we let an entire
investigation be disrupted by a broken bed?"

 

"So instead you two fucked like bunnies in one bed?"
Skinner said and I could help but laugh.



"Hardly sir." I say.

 

"Monica, I know your reputation and I know about
Follmer don't make the same mistake with Doggett." 
I'm not sure exactly what he means by mistake.  

 

"Sir, what Brad and I had is really none of your
business.  Yes it might have been a mistake from the
past but what John and I have is different."    

 

"Agents I don't care what happens between the two of
you to be honest, as long as it does NOT happen on
bureau time.  See to it or I'll have you both tossed
out of the FBI, is that understood?"

 

"Yes Sir." John and I both say and Skinner nods his
head in agreement.  "Why don't you two take the rental
car for dinner and I'll take Dana out with my rental
someplace downtown perhaps."

 

"Thank you Sir." I say firmly and John mumbles the
same.  



John grabs the keys from Dana and she whispers
something into his ear and then John and I walk out
the door and clasp it behind us.  

 

"What did she say to you?" I ask him.

 

"Oh she tried to call to warn us that he flew in
unexpectedly but we didn't answer our cell."  

 

I laugh and grab John's hand "too late, although I
think he took it pretty well."



John laughs, "if you call that well."

 

Sometimes life has a way of surprising us.  I can't
fathom the idea that everything happens for a reason,
but I also don't believe it is pure chaos.  I guess
for a believer in most phenomena, I can't toss either
idea out the window.  I think some things just happen,
while others are determined, although by what you ask?
 Fate?  Perhaps, although some answers we may never
know.  Some aren't meant for us, and aren't meant to
ponder, while others are.  You shouldn't dwell on the
small mysteries of life because the more important
aspects will pass us by.

 

We arrived at the restaurant and John was a gentleman
as always.  He escorted me inside, hand on my lower
back, guiding me in.  Such a small gesture, yet so
endearing as well.  We sat down at the table, ordered
our meals and chatted freely.  



"Mon would you like some champagne or anything to
drink?" 

 

"I think I'll just wait till the party.  Not much
sense to start now," and he gives me one of those
grins with his baby blues shining deep.  I swear I
could see into his soul at that very moment.

 

"Yeah you're right," John says and his smile at that
moment made my stomach knot like a lovesick
schoolgirl.  Man do I have it bad for him.  Guess it's
not so bad, since he seems to reciprocate our
relationship but still.  I've never been like this for
anyone, especially not Brad.     



"Mon?"

 

"Yeah?" I reply and snap out of my haze of fog. 

 

"You sure you're up to tonight?"

 

"Most definitely, just thinking," I respond.



John looks confused "thinking about what Mon, us?"

 

"Yeah that, and I don't know there's so much going on
right now."  I tell him.

 

"If you want to take things slow we can.  There's no
need to rush into anything."



"I know, besides I'm the one who's been chasing you,
remember?"

 

We both laugh and he gives me his look of concern,
"seriously Monica." He states and I nod.  



"I know, I just think I need some time to adjust to
this, I mean us.  Not that I don't want it, I just
need some time, that's all." I say and gesture with my
hands.  John nods and seems to understand where I'm
coming from.  



"I just can't believe I'm the one holding us back, I'd
have never thought in a million years." I say and he
smiles over at me.



"There's nothing to be worried about Monica, after all
I'd never leave you.  You know that, right?"  

 

"Yeah, but sometimes I worry I mean we both work for
the FBI John.  I can't stand the fact that I could
lose you.  I'm not sure if I could go on after that."

 

"I feel the same way Monica, but we can't let that get
in the way of our lives," John says and he's right, we
can't.

 

Once we finish our meals and the check is paid for, we
head to the rental car.  John opens the door for me
and I slide in.  He shuts it and walks over to the
driver's side door and steps into the car. 

 

We pull out of the parking lot and head back towards
campus.  



"So you ready for the party?" John asks.

 

"Yeah, but I think we should have a code or something.
 I mean I haven't been to one of these in years and
I'm not sure how much they've changed," I say.  He
laughs and nods his head.



"Your right Mon, but we're also gonna hang together
because you're my girlfriend, remember?  So we should
be alright."

 

"Yep, don't forget to call me Bethie.  We don't want
them on to us."  

 

"I know Bethie," he teases and I laugh.  "So why don't
I have a code name?"



"It wasn't really a big deal before.  We sort of
figured you weren't getting an id or anything so you
were just you.  You want one too?"

 

"Yeah I think I should be entitled to one.  After all,
we'll have fun playing our little game."

 

"Our little game eh?" I say rather teasingly and he
laughs.

 

We pull into the hotel parking lot, drop the car off,
and walk back towards the campus.  It's not really
that far of a walk, except it's still slightly chilly
out.

 

"Here" he states and gives me his coat again.  I
willingly oblige and wrap it around my shoulders.  

 

When we get back to Grant Towers we enter the
building, and I take John's hand in mine.  He whispers
into my ear "So?"

 

"What?" I ask him and he laughs.

 

"What's my name?" I sigh, because it seems I've
completely forgotten and there's no point now in
making something up, we'll be there in five minutes,
not even.

 

"John."



"Bethie." He states and I giggle once again.  I love
the way his words come out, and for some reason him
calling me by Bethie arouses the hell out of me.



"Come on," I say and grab hold of his hand and take
him to our little dorm room.  I put the key in the
door and I hear chattering behind us.  John wraps his
arms around me and I can't help but turn around and
see all the commotion.

 

I turn into John's arms and he kisses me deep and hard
and shoves me against the shut door of the dorm.  We
haven't even gotten inside, and I'm certain there are
people starring at us, but he doesn't seem to care, so
why should I?  We pull back for a breath and his head
goes beside my right ear with his right hand propping
us up against the door and his left hand is moving
over my breast.  He whispers into my ear "They're
watching, and I haven't been invited yet" and he
kisses me again.  Deeper this time if I ever thought
imaginable.  Our tongues play a dueling dance and I'm
about ready to fall to the ground.  He pulls back so I
can breath and he gives me one of those sexy as hell
looks and I can't help it but laugh.  I then notice
past his shoulder are Michelle, Alyson and three other
unknown girls.  Everyone except Alyson seems to have
incredible eyes.  

 

They're star-shaped lens and I'm truly surprised they
all seem to have the same ones.  

 

"Bethie!" Michelle comes over and gives me a hug.  "We
were looking for you, the party is tonight you know"
and she smiles up at John.  "And who might this lucky
fellow be?"

 

"Her boyfriend," he states and I laugh since we still
haven't chosen a name for him yet.  He puts out his
hand to be friendly, and then he wraps both of his
arms around my waist, since he's now standing behind
me.  "The parties tonight?" He states rather gloomily.
 



"You can come if you'd like" Alyson offers and I look
to Michelle and she nods in affirmation.



"Thanks" John states "Oh yeah, we brought you some
stuff," and John opens the dorm and grabs the paper
bag with alcohol and takes it into Michelle and
Alyson's room.  I can only assume that since William
isn't in here, he's in one of the other girl's rooms. 
John and myself sit down beside one another and he
puts his hand on my leg.  If it were any other guy I'd
swat him, given the outfit I'm wearing and how his
hand is slowly traveling up my thigh, but not John. 

 

The other three mysterious girls sit down across from
us and Michelle is doing introductions.  I've noticed
that she seems to be the leader of the pact and they
follow her every word.  I'm not sure if it's some sort
of cult brainwashing or what, but she seems to have
them trained.

 

Michelle introduces the girls (left to right) "These
are some of our friends Jamie, Natalie, and Kristin." 
Each girl waves as Michelle introduces her to us. 

 

"I'm Bethie" I state "and this is my boyfriend John."

 

"Nice to meet you both" Jamie replies and smiles over
at us.  



Michelle pulls out the alcohol and mixes the drinks to
hand out.  John pulls me to him and whispers into my
ear "make sure she doesn't put anything in the
drinks," so I watch as she pours the alcohol and the
juice together.  

 

"How much do you want?" Michelle asks John and he
looks at me for an answer.  John looks concerned. I
grin and speak over towards Michelle "two for now
should do."  John's fear tends to settle down a bit
when I answer Michelle.  

 

Michelle hands us are drinks and we turn off the main
lights in the room.  Jamie turns around and switches
on the black lights and the strobe.  While Kristin
turns on the rope lights and Natalie flips the bubble
machine on.  



"You guys have a really sweet room," I say.

 

Alyson looks over towards me and says, "Thanks Bethie,
we've got some music too but that's for later," and
her and Michelle start giggling like they're up to no
good.  

 

I can't help but wonder what they have planned for
later tonight.  I've been to a few parties back in
college, and from what I remember; I did some crazy
things when I was drunk.  Might as well have some fun
I figure, and smile over at John, and he looks like
he's up to something too.  It's ashame I can't read
him right now, because he has this look in his eye and
I'd love to know what he's thinking.  Guess I'll have
to ask him later, when we're alone.

 

"Hey Mon?" John whispers into my ear.

 

"Yeah?" I say and tilt my head up towards him; we're
still sitting side by side.  He leans in to whisper
something and moves my hair behind my ear.  He
whispers to me, "you're so beautiful" and his mouth
descends upon my own.  I move my arms to embrace him
and he gently lies back on the bed and I follow his
maneuvers.  We're kissing and caressing and I'm lying
above him and I can feel his urgent needs pressing
through.  I look up and smile at him, lost at the fact
there's other people in the room, and he plunges for
my neck kissing and nibbling his way down my body.  He
runs his hands along my body, and I can't help but
revel in the sensation.  I need to touch him and I
pull his shirt from his pants, and plunge in for
another kiss.    

 

I hear the faintest of murmurs and we break apart at
the sound of the door shutting.  I glance over at John
and he's got this smart-ass grin on his face.  "I knew
it'd work."  He says and I give him 'the look'.  "Hey
I'd love to have you right now, but it seems to me
that it'd be more your style."

 

I laugh and we sit up on the bed.  "My style?"  I say
and laugh at the thought.  He stands up, goes to the
door and locks it and opens the closet.  He starts
rummaging around through there and he points to the
desk.  "Why don't you see if you find anything
useful?"  

 

I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that at
any moment they're going to walk in, and catch us red
handed.  "John what if they come in?" I say and he
laughs.  



"I already thought of that, we're looking for a
condom."  He perks up and grins like he's been
planning that line all night.  I can't help but laugh
at how crazy we look and sound right now.    

 

I open up another drawer and sort through some files
and papers until I come across the ticket stub for the
plane they ticket.  

 

"John, here." I say and hand it to him.  He shoves it
into his pocket and the door handle jiggles.  "Just a
second" I say and shut the drawer that I've been
searching in, I guess I'm lucky they didn't bring
their key.  John lies back down on the bed and I open
the door to see Jamie, Natalie, and Alyson waiting to
come back in.  

 

Natalie walks in first and looks to John, "Are you
guys done for now?  Or should we leave again?"  I
can't seem to decipher her tone but she doesn't seem
too happy.  Maybe she knows what we're up to.  

 

"Where'd Michelle and Kristin go?" I ask the girls.

 

Alyson sits down across from us on the other bed and
takes a gulp from her cup.  "They had to take care of
something," and I can only venture to imagine that she
means, William.  

 

I lean into John's arms and close my eyes.  The strobe
light is starting to get to me, and I can't help but
enjoy this closeness between us.  Alyson notices my
discomfort from the strobe, and turns it off without
saying a word.  



"Thanks," I reply and she smiles coyly at me.  I'm not
a complete profiler when it comes to the FBI, that's
not my specialty, but I can definitely profile Alyson.
 She seems to be the follower of the group.  She
doesn't appear to fit in, and I don't just think that
because her eyes are different.  Maybe she's a loner
when it comes to things or maybe she just happened to
get involved into something bigger than she ever
imagined.  

 

Kristin rushes in and looks at the three girls "Jamie
and Natalie I need to speak with you" and they rush
out the room and slam the door.

 

As the girls slam the door the phone rings and Alyson
says, "would you mind getting that?  I'm not home
alright?"

 

"Sure," I reply.  I pick up the phone, "Hello?"

 

"Monica is that you?"  My heart falls into the pit of
my stomach at the voice on the other end of the phone,
it's Brad.  "No I'm sorry, you must be mistaken."  I
say, and hang up the phone.  



"Shit" I mutter under my breath and run out to the
bathroom.  



John follows after me into the 'little girls room' and
I can't help but fall apart.  I feel sick to my
stomach and head to the bathroom to puke, but I know
I'm not sick from alcohol.  It's the fact we've been
caught.  

 

"Who was that Mon?" John asks me and gives me this
confused look I notice when I glance upwards.  He puts
his hand on my shoulder and bends beside me to wipe
the hair from my face.  

 

"Brad." I say dryly and the sound of his name on my
throat churns my stomach once again.  I feel my
stomach turn and my pulse race.  My skins feels sticky
and I can't help but want to fall to the floor and
make all of this go away.

 

"What? How?" 



"I don't know." I say and I want to cry out for
something.  Some sign.  We might as well be busted
because I'm sure Brad's getting hold of Alyson right
now.  

 

"You've got to keep your cool Monica.  I don't know
what Brad's connection is, but we'll figure it out. 
We'll find William, there's no other option."  He
states and I know he's right.  I agree and stand up
from the toilet. 

 

John helps gather me to my feet, and walks with me
towards the sink.  He turns the cool water on and
places his hands under it.  He pools some of the cool
water onto my flushed skin and the contact alone sends
a chill down my spine.  After another minute or so, I
start to regain some composure and relax a bit.  



"We have to go back in there." John says and he's
right.  



"What am I going to tell her?"  I say and he looks me
in the eyes, the truth Monica, the truth."  



I nod and know what comes next, I'm just afraid of the
consequences of it all.

 

We enter back into the dorm room and I sit down on the
bed. 

 

Alyson glances downward and I can tell something is
going on.  I fear she's on to us but then I see a tear
gently slide down her cheek.  

 

I come over and sit down beside her, "What's wrong?" I
say and she looks away.  



"Nothing that matters." She says and she puts her
knees up to her chest and hides her head for then her
tears begin to fall.

 

"It must matter if you're upset about it.  Where did
they go?" I question and she rests her head towards
the side to look towards the window and away from me. 




"Where they always go."

 

I can tell that she's not making this simple, but I
can sense that she wants to tell us.  She's just
afraid of the implications. 

 

"What has upset you?" I ask and rest my hand on her
arm for comfort.  She lets out a long deep sigh and I
can tell she's troubled by it all.

 

"You're not really a college student are you?"  She
looks up at me and I nod.  



"You're right I'm not.  I'm with the FBI and this is
my partner John Doggett.  We're here investigating a
case, the kidnapping of a young boy, William.  Do you
know anything about that Alyson?"

 

She looks away and I can see her tears spilling out,
even though she's trying to hide them.  "The girls
just came back in while you two were away, and there's
been some trouble."

 

"What kind of trouble?" I ask and only more tears are
shed.  "Does it have to do with William?" I ask and
she nods her head ever so briefly.

 

"Where is he?" John speaks up and stands from the bed.
 "If you're keeping anything from us, we'll see to it
that you and you're friends will spend the rest of
your life behind bars."



"I didn't even want to be involved." Alyson says and
she looks up at me.  "All because we ended up as
roommates, I get pulled into this whole ordeal."

 

"Anything you tell us may keep you out of prison." I
say and she nods. 



"William's in danger."

 

"Where is he?" John demands an answer and pulls Alyson
to her feet.  "Take us to him."  



She nods her head in affirmation and heads towards the
door when my cell phone goes off.  John picks it up
from the bed and hands it too me.  



"Reyes" I answer.

 

"Well hello Monica.  May I ask what you're doing
ruining a perfectly legit investigation?" The voice on
the other end of the phone answers.  I recognize it
and my anger boils to the surface.



"Brad, what the hell are you talking about?" I shout
back and he laughs a deep throaty laugh.  

 

"Michelle or Shelita as you like to call her.  She's
an informant of mine, has been for some time now. 
What brings you to her school?"

 

"What doesn't Brad?  Everything leads right here and
back to you."

 

"Are you accusing me of something Agent Reyes?  I
really hope you've found some incriminating evidence
linking me to your investigation."  

 

"An informant Brad, give me a break?"  I retort and
his laugh is really putting me on edge.

 

"Oh Monica, you don't honestly believe your partner is
going to save your career or that little boy of Agent
Scully's, do you?  

 

He lost his own son, what makes you think he's going
to find hers?  What makes you honestly believe he
wants to?"  He spits out the sentence like he's trying
to tear me apart and if we weren't on the phone I'd
have slugged him for it.

 

"Brad I swear if you have so much as a speck of dirt
on you in regards to this case, I will see to it that
you'll be thrown out of the FBI!"  I shout in the
phone and I can just imagine the Cheshire cat grin
spread across his face.

 

"Are you this feisty with everyone in the bureau or
just the ones that make you come?"

 

"You bastard!" I scream and I notice John's looking
over at me concerned.  I'm flushed from rage and if
Brad were actually around I'd slam him to the ground,
to bad.  I shut off the phone and throw in into the
bed.

 

John steps over towards me and I collapse on the bed,
trying to regain my composure.  He places his hands on
my shoulder in a comforting gesture "Are you alright?"
  

 

"Yeah Brad's just being an asshole nothing unusual" I
retort and I can see a strange look in John's eyes
from my words.  

 

"Sorry" I mutter up and he smiles.



"Don't be.  Come on, Alyson was just about to take us
to William."  We stand up and he puts his arm around
me, and Alyson heads towards the door.  



"William's this way," she points as we're walking out
into the hallway, "but there's been trouble.  You'll
see what I mean."  

 

Alyson says and stops at room 835. 

 

"He's in there." Alyson motions towards the door that
reads 835.  "I'm so sorry."  She says, and I glance
over towards John.  

 

He pulls out his gun and hands me his spare, since I
couldn't conceal one with the outfit I'm wearing.  I
stand against the wall beside the door, and John tests
the doorknob ever so slowly to see if it's unlocked. 
He signals that it's open and I stand gun drawn as his
backup.  He opens the door, gun in hand to see the
four girls leaning over William.  "FBI!" he shouts.

 

Natalie looks up, and I can see she's been crying. 
John rushes to William, and bends down to his side. 
John searches for a pulse and shakes his head in
dismay; "His pulse is thready."  

 

I pull out my phone and dial 911.  "What happened?" 
John shouts at the girls and Natalie speaks up.

 

"I don't know how it could of happened.  We didn't
even leave it near the crib," Natalie says and tears
start to stream out her eyes. 

 

"Leave what?"  I shout out at her and she looks away. 


 

"Everclear."  Michelle states and picks up William
from the floor.  His body is now motionless and it
appears he's at least unconscious, if not the
inevitable.  "He wasn't supposed to die.  That wasn't
his fate."  She replies rather calmly.

 

"His fate?"  John retorts.  "What the hell would you
know about his fate?  You kidnapped him for crying out
loud, you're the reason he's laying there dying.  If
he doesn't pull through this, believe me neither will
any of you!"  

 

I finish giving the information to the paramedics on
the phone and take William from Michelle's arms.  I
lie him down on the bed and check him for a pulse once
again.  "William don't do this to me."  I say to the
little boy and I feel the presence of an unknown
force.  "You're not taking him!"  I shout.  "He's just
a little boy," and I collapse to the bed wrapping
myself around William in hopes of protecting him.     
   

 

Time seems to fall like drops of rain, ever so fast
and yet so slow.  Expanding moments in time perhaps to
keep more from being stolen, or yet perhaps to give
time for a final goodbye.  I'd rather not think which
is the case as I'm laying here protecting Dana's son
from death.  My tears are falling, and I don't know
what else to do.  If I could save him surely I would. 
I'd give my own life if necessary, but it wouldn't
change the present or the future, and right now I'm
stuck in a moment wishing we could change the past. 
Wishing we could go back, and send Dana off with
Mulder and William, but it was her decision to stay. 
I can understand where she was coming from, but it
wasn't worth it.  This wretched situation we've gotten
ourselves into.  I can hear John in the hallway on his
cell phone contacting the assistant director, and
giving him the horrible news.

 

Next thing I know I feel an arm pull me back from
William and everything appears surreal.  The
paramedics have arrived and they're asking me
questions about William.  I can't answer, I'm frozen
in time, stuck between two planes of existence praying
for this child's life.  They take him from my arms and
rush him out towards the ambulance.  

 

John hangs up the phone and he pulls me to my feet. 
"Monica. Monica. Monica."  By the third time he chants
my name I snap out of distant trance and look up at
him.  I can see the anguish in his eyes and we head
towards the ambulance to see Dana approaching the
ambulance.  She has a sheer look of horror on her face
and she enters the ambulance and holds Williams tiny
hand.  The paramedics shut the door behind her, and
A.D. Skinner asks what hospital they're taking him to.


 

A.D. Skinner walks toward us, and John has his arms
around me in support.  I'm still weak and nauseated
from the thought of losing another child.  Once again
not my own, but that fact rarely seems to matter.  I'm
still grief-stricken, and I lean into John's shoulder.
 My tears silently flow and I know John's trying to be
strong for me and for everyone else.  



The ambulance sirens wail, and they rush off towards
the hospital.  I look up from John's shoulder for a
brief instant, and I can't bare to look into his eyes.
 I know he's suffering far worse than I am, but I know
if I see into his heart I'll fall apart and I can't do
that right now.  I rest my eyes and for a brief second
complete silence emerges.  It's a strange sense almost
overwhelming of future events to come.  The end is
nowhere near and yet it is.  A brief moment later, I
hear tires screeching and I glance up to see FBI and
squad cars storming in.  

 

Kishwaukee Community Hospital

 

It's been a little over an hour and a half since the
FBI arrived, and after giving them our statements and
what not, we pulled into the hospital parking lot.

 

"Are you ready?" John asked and he unbuckled his
seatbelt and turned toward me.  I nodded my head yes
but my heart told me no.  

 

"Not really much of a choice."  I finally muster up
and I feel butterflies dancing at the thought of
something terrible happening to William.  John notices
my anxiety and leans in to brush his lips upon my own
ever so gently.  He pulls back after the briefest of
contact and his lips twinge in a faint smile.  

 

We step out of the car and walk hand in hand into the
hospital to find out the news, good or bad, about
William.  

 

We step into the corridor and follow the signs.  As
we're heading towards where William is being cared
for, I bump into a gentleman and I turn to see who it
is.

 

"Agent Mulder?"  I say rather confused.  It's been
awhile since I've seen him but I never forget a face. 




"How is he?"  Mulder asks and I'm sure the puzzled
look on my face gives it all away.  "The Lone Gunmen
contacted me and as soon as I heard..." he trails off.

 

"I'm so sorry."  I say and I place my hand on his
shoulder, and he sighs a long deep breath.  "Have you
seen him or Dana yet?"  I speak up.

 

"No, I couldn't face losing him," Mulder replies. 
"How'd you do it Agent Doggett?"  



"With the help from a special friend."  John replies
and glances over towards me.  I squeeze his hand, and
he looks down at me and whispers into my ear, "thank
you Monica."    

 

Tears invade my eyes and I know I have to be strong
once again, this time for someone else.  I glance into
the room where 

 

Dana and William are, and she's holding him and
rocking him.  Her back is to me, so I know she hasn't
seen Agent Mulder yet.  I slowly and ever so quietly
open the door and both John and Mulder follow behind
me.  

 

Dana doesn't turn around to face us but I can see her
hand come up to wipe the tears that have fallen upon
her cheeks.  I stop behind her and put my hand on her
shoulder.  "Someone's here to see you."  I gently say
and Mulder comes out from behind.

 

"Dana how is he?"  Mulder asks and his gaze sets upon
their young son, a mere few months old and yet so much
life to live.  

 

So much life being stolen from William and from them.

 

"It's hard to tell.  Things seem tame now.  He still
hasn't regained consciousness, but we won't know until
later on if there's any permanent brain damage."  Dana
continues to rock their son and once again her eyes
fill with tears of fear for her sons life and for
Mulder's.  John and I begin to feel like we're
invading their personal space.  



"We're sorry for your tragedy."  John says and I rest
my hand upon Williams, and lace his tiny fingers into
my own.  I feel a tiny squeeze and for the briefest of
a moment I think I'm imagining thing and then I see
it.  His eyes flutter open and jolt a surprise through
all our hearts.  I bend down and place a kiss upon his
forehead.  



"We'll be outside."  I say and John walks with me
towards the door.  Before we leave I hear Dana's words
to Mulder.

 

"You shouldn't be here."  

 

It's barely above a whisper but I know he's aching for
her as much as she's aching for him.  They both have
been through some much hell and torment.  I turn
around before shutting the door to see Mulder place a
kiss upon Williams cheek and I 

hear him say, "You're right Dana, I'm sorry."

 

I shut the door quietly and notice that he hasn't
headed towards the door.  Maybe that's a good sign. 
Maybe William will be perfectly fine and maybe all is
right with the world for once.  Just maybe.  

 

"Your cell's ringing," John states and I don't even
realize it's been going off until he mentions it.  



"Agent Reyes" I state.  

 

"How's the boy?"  The voice on the other end of the
phone calls out.  

 

"Michelle?"  I question and I know it can't be.  She
should be in custody right now.

 

"It's true isn't it?"  She asks.

 

"What?"  I say in response not knowing what is going
on.

 

"He's immortal."  She states and then she hangs up.

 

"What? Hello?"  I say and the phone's dead.  I look up
at John, and his gaze peers into my heart.  "Strangest
call."  

 

"Yeah, was it Michelle?"  John asks.

 

"I think so.  She asked how William was and then took
the leap to assume he's immortal."  

 

"That's insane."  He replies.

 

"It just might be, but what if she's right.  I mean
what were the odds of William surviving tonight?"

 

"Monica you're sounding crazy yourself, and we're
still not out of the clear on William."

 

"I know, but what if perhaps William knew he was
immortal.  Isn't it at all possible that he knew he
would survive, and this was his way of telling us and
how do we explain him getting hold of the alcohol
anyhow?"

 

"I don't know Mon, but I think you're leaping to
pretty big conclusions." 

 

John and I sit down in the waiting room next to one
another and I take his hand in mine.  "How are you
doing with all of this?"  

 

I ask him.

 

"Managing."  John says and he looks down at me with
the saddest puppy dog eyes.  



"John you don't have to go through this alone, you
know that" and I squeeze his hand and rest my hand
upon his shoulder.  I feel him let out a breath and he
turns to look down at our entwined hands.



"Thank you."  

 

"Anytime John, anytime."  

 

A.D. Skinner arrives in the waiting room looking
anxious as ever.  "How is he?"  He inquires and
glances around suspiciously like something is going
on.  



"He finally regained consciousness," I tell him. 
"There's still a chance of permament brain damage
because he was deprived of oxygen but so far things
seem to be taking a turn for the better."  



"Shelita wasn't found in her room."  Skinner comments
and looks from side to side down the corridor. 



"Do you think she's still after William?"  I ask and
Skinner's face turn grave.

 

"Dana has been through so much, first Mulder and now
William."



I interrupt his next thought, "Sir, Agent Mulder is in
the room with Agent Scully."



"What?!"  Skinner replies and storms towards their
room.  He briskly knocks and enters swiftly.  John and
I stand at the doorway not to intrude.  



"You all shouldn't be here."  Skinner adds towards
Mulder whose gaze falls then to their son William. 
"Your lives are in danger and sticking together will
only make them stronger."



Mulder stands up, and replies, "he's right, that's why
I left and I shouldn't be here."



Scully stands up with William cradled in her arms "you
think you can just get up and walk out of my life
again?"  I can see tears forming in her eyes and she
glances towards the window so no one will see her
pain. 

 

"Dana you asked me to leave, I wanted to stay but you
thought it was for the best.  I pleaded with you, for
you and William to come with me, but you didn't want
to keep on running."

 

"I know" she nods her head, "it was a mistake."  Dana
adds and her tears are pouring from deep within her
heart.  



Mulder steps over towards her and wipes her pain away
and brushes a light kiss to her cheek.  "I'll never
stop loving you 

Dana, but is this what you ultimately want?  For our
son?"

 

"Oh Mulder, from the moment you left I've had so many
questions about our son, and my fears got the best of
me.  I can't do this alone."  She says.

 

The thought of this place makes me sick, as well as my
concern for John's well being.  I take Johns hand and
motion for the door.  We step outside of the hospital,
and take a seat on the curb.  John puts his arm around
me, and I lean into his body for support.

 

"You ok?"  He asks concerned. 

 

"Yeah, I'm just not a fan of hospitals" I tell him.

 

"Me either."  He states and lets out a long sigh he's
been holding.

 

"What's all that about?" I ask him.  

 

"What?"



"Your sigh," I say and he laughs.

 

"So much has gone on lately.  I guess it has taken a
lot out of me.  Well that and you."

 

"Me?"  I say innocently and he laughs.

 

"Yeah you, and us.  It's all so relatively new."

 

"You don't want it?" I ask him and I fear his answer. 
Maybe I shouldn't, but I do.

 

"Of course I want to be with you Mon, I just worry
about work and our pasts and what if it doesn't work
out."



"Your past."  I clarify and he nods his head.  "It's
alright to remember John, it's alright to let go too. 
Sometimes you've got to move on, but if you're not
ready, we can take it once step at a time."



"I know, I guess I just can't seem to become free from
all the restraints, and the pain of my past."

 

"It takes time."



"It's been time."

 

"You will John, you will.  I can't promise we'll
always be together but look how far we've come
together?  Neither one of us could have faced our
pasts alone."

 

"Yours wasn't that horrific," he states and his gaze
settles on the ground in front of us.

 

"My life wasn't perfect either though John, far from
it."

 

"I know, I know." He states.

 

"From now on we move forward with our lives.  The past
is just that, in the past.  We shouldn't let it steal
our future from us.  

 

We'll just take one day at a time and we'll go from
there.  We'll get through this together, like we
always have."



"And we always will."




  

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